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Post Reply I need more people to talk to
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17

Werning wrote:

"i just think i'm not boring"

When previously you said

"I have been told by many people i'm not boring "

"i just come across as boring"

You think you're boring, and when you talk about it, it annoys some other people. If you were actually boring, chances are those people who removed you wouldn't have added you in the first place.


i never bring it up well not until now and when i get removed i get told usually it's cause i'm boring.
Only my current friends which are very few have said i'm not boring.

I Can't figure out what i'm doing wrong i take genuine interest in people talk to them about their hobbies and mine there isn't much extra one can do so it baffles me as i want to solve this problem since it's ruining any chance of a social life i have.

A problem always has a solution but i can't figure it out unless people communicate with me tell me what is making me seem boring and fix that issue as i can't see it myself that is obvious.

if i can solve these problems i feel i will be better off but anyone who can tell me what the issue is refuses to talk with me so i'm left with one option just talking to people and hoping they don't find me boring and if they do they tell me what the issue is that makes me seem boring.

I don't think it's too much to just ask here for anyone to talk to me since this is the only place i really socialise \o/

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17 / M / usa salem oregon
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
those who know dont talk.
those who talk dont know.
lol just a quote it doesnt really help your problem but its something to think about ill be any ones friend if there down to talk about anime im just a simple otaku wanting to msg on the post the quote comes from a book called tao te ching if your interested
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22 / M / Canada
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
Kind of like the very common ugly complex, you think you're not boring but boring at the same time. What a boring complex!

Why not simply stop trying to appeal to people who make you feel that way? Do you really want to take part in a 'social life' which is itself the catalyst of this whole dilemma for you?

Really ask yourself.
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17 / M / usa salem oregon
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
he who tries to shine dims his own light.
he who defines himself cant know who he really is.
stop thinking and end your problems.
must you value what others value, avoid what others avoid how ridiculous.
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17

Werning wrote:

Kind of like the very common ugly complex, you think you're not boring but boring at the same time. What a boring complex!

Why not simply stop trying to appeal to people who make you feel that way? Do you really want to take part in a 'social life' which is itself the catalyst of this whole dilemma for you?

Really ask yourself.


Sure i do i want a social life.
I try to appeal to those around me as much as possible whilst remaining who i am that's one thing i will never change.
All i can do is keep trying which i will always do because there is a light at the other end there has to be.

Though i guess i can ponder on this more in the morning since i need to sleep but i honestly just want to make more friends and have people to talk to why wouldn't anyone want that?

As long as it doesn't cost changing who you are to a great extent.
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Batcave
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

I have been told by many people i'm not boring i just come across as boring which is why others are likely to not enjoy talking to me.
That's all i meant i just think i'm not boring from my perspective of what boring is i'm not disagreeing that others percieve me as boring because it's obvious they do and no matter how many changes i make about myself that opinion doesn't change for new people i meet :/


Judging from the way you talk about yourself and other people, you just seem to be really insecure. I don't think anyone else can help you with that. Having more friends will definitely not either. It all starts from you.
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17 / M / usa salem oregon
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
well my friends in real life literally came to me if you want more friends in real life you gotta be more open about things about how you feel and stuff i was just standing back letting life happen now i got like 4 friends who lived with me for like a year and other friends coming and going so no need to worry about it if they find you interesting then they will come to you if they cant accept you for who you are then who need those kind of friends any way
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17

Axerilis wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

I have been told by many people i'm not boring i just come across as boring which is why others are likely to not enjoy talking to me.
That's all i meant i just think i'm not boring from my perspective of what boring is i'm not disagreeing that others percieve me as boring because it's obvious they do and no matter how many changes i make about myself that opinion doesn't change for new people i meet :/


Judging from the way you talk about yourself and other people, you just seem to be really insecure. I don't think anyone else can help you with that. Having more friends will definitely not either. It all starts from you.


I'm not insecure i'm fine i'm a great person and am confident about myself not about how others see me but that's mostly on them unless well in a situation like this where it requires both people ^^
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29 / M / Hellhole, USA
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
I don't know if you're boring, but you do sound very needy. I get that you may be lonely, but you seem to be coming at this from the wrong angle. You're wanting friends and people to talk to because it's missing from your life --- you're trying to fill that void. So you go out of your way to try to make an impression and bombard the person with questions and try to be funny.

Stop dwelling so much on what the person thinks about you and let the friendship grow organically.

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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17

tntcls wrote:

I don't know if you're boring, but you do sound very needy. I get that you may be lonely, but you seem to be coming at this from the wrong angle. You're wanting friends and people to talk to because it's missing from your life --- you're trying to fill that void. So you go out of your way to try to make an impression and bombard the person with questions and try to be funny.

Stop dwelling so much on what the person thinks about you and let the friendship grow organically.



you are probably right thanks and i am needy that's not a bad thing though it's not a good thing either it is what it is.
but you are probably right in what you said.
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28 / M / New Jersey
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
Well I'm going to play devils advocate here and offer my friendship. I do enjoy talking to people quite often and am well versed in the art of conversation. I may come off as a bit insane sometimes but that's just a side effect from being a writer. I have a variety of different hobbies and love anime to death.

Feel free to send me a friend request and message me anytime to talk. (this goes for anyone on this forum in need of a friend.)
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Boise, Idaho
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
lol same hmu
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M / Vancouver, BC, Ca...
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

i am needy





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F / BuBbLeS!
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/17/17
what a shame, I don't consider you boring, seems like their loss not yours. I rather like interacting with you and I hope you find other friends. I will accept any friend's request and talk just about anything, so best of luck and your future interactions with many
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Wherever
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Posted 9/17/17 , edited 9/18/17
Some deep life lessons in this thread
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