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Post Reply Anime ruined by exes?
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25 / F / VA, US
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Posted 10/30/17
Funny question I'm sure but does anyone else have a series that is a bit tarnished by the memory of someone else? I can't watch several series from it. Makes me think next relationship I'll just keep it as my own safe haven bc it really is my own little world
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21 / M / Imouto Sanctuary
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Posted 10/30/17


I never had that problem, but have a headpat, my imouto. I think it is natural to want to share your hobbies with someone else. Something as personal and unique as a song, a film, or an anime series are unfortunately the type to be associated in particular. That being said, I tend to keep such hobbies to myself, and only bring up anime I liked beforehand to discussion, instead of liking it in the context of being with a romantic partner.

Ex:

Person 1: I like this anime airing this season, do you?

Person 2: Indeed, I do as well.


Perhaps that could help with association, if you liked the series without any specific input from said partner.
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25 / F / VA, US
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Posted 10/30/17


ahh! you make it sound as if said anime was somehow forced upon my partner!! we actually fell in love over playing pokemon as kids lol. but honestly I mean more like series you shared with someone on the couch all the way through haha.
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23 / F
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Posted 10/30/17
Yeah. Some anime and songs
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Posted 10/30/17 , edited 10/30/17
All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is a place I'd dearly love to be, but all my exes live in Texas, that's why I hang my hat in Tennessee.

But, nah I couldn't let someone ruin something I like...I imagine the ill feelings you have over those anime will fade in time, and you can enjoy them again.
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21 / M / Imouto Sanctuary
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Posted 10/30/17

j4zzberry wrote:



ahh! you make it sound as if said anime was somehow forced upon my partner!! we actually fell in love over playing pokemon as kids lol. but honestly I mean more like series you shared with someone on the couch all the way through haha.


I apologize, that wasn't my intention. I tend to share my hobbies after a while, due to that it gives one more thing to converse about, and another facet of a romantic partner that I can see and appreciate, despite how crappy their taste is.

As for a series watched simultaneously, that is what I generally think may have lead to such things, if not heavy conversations stemming from a mutual watching of any sort, such as a recommendation, a rabbit stream, etc.

I cannot say I have done so in a romantic tone, but I dislike Bakugo from My Hero Academia due to an asshole I have seen at several points being aggravating, nor will I look at Yang Wenli from The Legend Of The Galactic Heroes again after seeing as seemingly ignorant dullard parade his idiocy around the forums.



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25 / F / VA, US
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Posted 10/30/17

PeripheralVisionary wrote:


I cannot say I have done so in a romantic tone, but I dislike Bakugo from My Hero Academia due to an asshole I have seen at several points being aggravating, nor will I look at Yang Wenli from The Legend Of The Galactic Heroes again after seeing as seemingly ignorant dullard parade his idiocy around the forums.





lol THIS. anime also helps us cope with the assholes out there fs
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Posted 10/30/17
Never had that happen with an anime before but it did happen to me with Doctor Who. Use to watch that show religiously but I can't anymore no matter how hard I try so I can kind of relate.
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Posted 10/30/17
Yeah. Me and this girl weren't dating but we would do things on and off ;). One night, she saw I had crunchyroll downloaded on my PS4 and asked me if I liked a show called Miss Kobayashi's Dragonmaid. I laughed for like a minute and then got off my bed and told her to SKRRRT. She was pretty thicc but if you like moe anime I don't wanna talk.
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23 / F / Michigan
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Posted 10/30/17
Ergo Proxy

Great anime, don't get me wrong. However, my shittest ex suggested it and now whenever I see it I immediately think of them and get pissed.
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Posted 10/30/17
Nah. Relationships don't ruin masterpieces.

Good example was Cowboy Bebop. My ex loved it, but I loved it too. Idgaf. It's still one of the best for me.
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25 / F / VA, US
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Posted 10/30/17
yea I mean maybe you can't ruin a masterpiece like that. I still consider Ghibli all mine in this lil world haha.
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28 / M / livin in debauchery
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Posted 10/30/17
I guess my ex was into Inuyasha...?


I mean, I watched it because Adult Swim, but admittedly I might have feigned interest a bit. lol
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27 / M / Laramie, WY
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Posted 10/31/17
I remember a nasty breakup I had after which I couldn't deal with a few shows that reminded me of her. It was funny because the shows had nothing to do with our relationship, but for whatever reason watching them brought memories of her that I couldn't tolerate at the time. Macross Frontier was one (the ex in question confessed to me after anime club the same day we started watching the show in club, and I would play the soundtrack on my iPod whenever I would go and visit her), and Eureka Seven was another (watched the E7 movie on the Greyhound when I went to visit her in Casper for spring break - was the last time I saw her since she broke up with me over Facebook)

The actual shows themselves weren't so much of a trigger, but the music was. Whenever I hear music in anime I like, I download it to a music player and have a tendency to listen to it obsessively. On top of that I tend to associate certain memories with the song I was listening to at the time, and playing that song gives me the same emotion I had at the time. Certain songs I keep on my player just for the rush of nostalgia I feel from them. This is especially true for my first 2-4 years in Laramie, as it was a huge change both attending college for the first time and adjusting to my new home. Some of my best and worst memories are from this time period, as are some of shows I like and the songs I listen to to this day.

Thankfully, as far as this particular ex is concerned I've gotten over it to the point where I no longer feel sad or negative when I think of her, so I can watch these two anime without any negativity. Now that I think back, even if things didn't work out we were still happy while it lasted.
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Posted 10/31/17 , edited 10/31/17
No, but try to establish boundaries with yourself.

Things like "Would I like this show without X watching? Would I have come across this show eventually, even if years down the line and still liked it? Then it's not about X, I just watched it with X one time."

Hopefully that will lead to more bittersweet rather than aggravating memories.
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