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Post Reply How do people expect you to make friends IRL
605 cr points
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27 / F / USA
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Posted 1/2/18
I tell them I'm a girl online, then get friends
13403 cr points
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25 / M / Perth, Western Au...
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Posted 1/12/18 , edited 1/12/18

Ryulightorb wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:



yeah, or you can make more friends on the internet at home and stop worrying about how to get friends IRL... give it time and good things will happen, look for discord groups for popular streamers you follow or game clans you like etc


Yeah ill give it time and i don't really care for irl friends much but my family does and my psychologist keeps telling me i NEED Irl friends >.<


well maybe look for new places like art groups or joining into sport or something do manly shit like build a fire and fuck a girl near it something idk dude


Ryulightorb wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:



yeah, or you can make more friends on the internet at home and stop worrying about how to get friends IRL... give it time and good things will happen, look for discord groups for popular streamers you follow or game clans you like etc


Yeah ill give it time and i don't really care for irl friends much but my family does and my psychologist keeps telling me i NEED Irl friends >.<


well maybe look for new places like art groups or joining into sport or something do manly shit like build a fire and fuck a girl near it something idk dude


i will look into some art groups doing manly stuff and sports isn't something i enjoy but i do enjoy art a lot gonna check once everything opens up again in a week!


just do it :)

also check out internet groups you may find more groups on apps like DeviantArt, youtube and discord also things like twitch.tv that may show you different communities for whatever you enjoy :)

take care of yourself, also try walking around wearing things like sunscreen and covering up for summer skin cancer isn't cool guys anyways I'm sure you can do it, follow your dreams you can go to nasa if you wanted to
irene 
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18 / M / Canada
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Posted 1/13/18 , edited 1/16/18
>I hate pubs and will never goto one due to the noise level.
Take noise cancelling ear plugs. Whole box of like 400 for 20$. Cancels out most ambient noise but you can still usually hear when someone is speaking to you. Also pubs aren't inherently loud. Go to a nicer/classier one. Find a jazz or blues club and go there to enjoy the music.

>There are no clubs for interests in the areas or meetup groups on websites etc.
Yes there are. You're not looking hard enough. I never knew my town had any cybersec enthusiasts for years. Then it turns out that we have not only an OWASP chapter, but also a DEFCON group AND a 2600 group. On top of that my area has two universities with tons of clubs that don't care whether you're a student or not.
Try harder, then complain.

>Im trying to find a job but no luck.
Coworkers aren't always friends unless you work at a small business or a restaurant or something. Big companies, you might learn to like 3 people MAX.

Here's some other options:
>join Badoo, enter preference/purpose for finding friends instead of a relationship.
>If there really aren't any meetups for your interests (I still find this hard to believe) then start one yourself. There are people in your situation too.
>You're living with your parents and you're of a legal age to go to a club? The fuck are you doing?! Once you get a job, move out and get yourself a roommate or a few.
>Go to the gym, work out for a bit, find someone else working out alone, ask them to spot you, hit it off from there.
>Saw in a diff post you like computers. Go on craigslist, make an ad to fix computers for a small price or hell, even free. People will come to you for work, you'll meet a lot more people doing something you like and by encountering more people on a daily basis you'll be way more likely to make some friends.

From what I can tell, most people in this thread are either emos/asocials/don't have friends and want to feel better about themselves. Seeing stuff like "online friends are better than IRL friends," "friends are overrated," whatever. This is all bullshit. You can't call up an online friend to go get food together. You can't invite an online friend to celebrate something with you. You can't have an online friend be your best man/bridesmaid at your wedding (assuming you do find a worthwhile partner.) Don't try to pretend that online friends are on any level even close to an IRL friend. I've got lots of online friends, even online friends that live in my city, and a few really close IRL friends, and you can bet your firstborn I will always always always prioritize my IRL friends over my online ones.
180 cr points
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31 / M / Canada
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Posted 1/14/18
I'm not really interested in 'friendship'. There was a time though when I thought having a few buddies to chum around with was one of the most important things in life. I realized over the years that I just get more enjoyment out of structure. And I guess if friends were apart of that structure, that would be fine, but it's really the structure of things that I value the most ... my routine, that is, that keeps me together, rather than just chumming around with friends. Plus, Online friends are better anyway!
19826 cr points
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M
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Posted 1/14/18
I'm the opposite. I find it 100x easier to make friends IRL as opposed to online.
576 cr points
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19 / F / Sweden, Kalmar
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Posted 1/15/18
I'd suggest just try to go out a lot, any kind of activity, club, maybe a convention? Even if there aren't many options within 10 minutes, there's probably one not too far away.
Also the internet is a great way to make friends, and once you have one you'll likely be introduced to more of their friends. And after a while, voila, friends.

Where I live most people are quite reserved IRL, and we do not speak to strangers. Most of my friends are made through mutual friends, so once you get one there will likely be more opportunities.
30707 cr points
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 1/15/18

Perribotta wrote:

I'd suggest just try to go out a lot, any kind of activity, club, maybe a convention? Even if there aren't many options within 10 minutes, there's probably one not too far away.
Also the internet is a great way to make friends, and once you have one you'll likely be introduced to more of their friends. And after a while, voila, friends.

Where I live most people are quite reserved IRL, and we do not speak to strangers. Most of my friends are made through mutual friends, so once you get one there will likely be more opportunities.



No conventions im leaving town to goto one in 3 months and the only activities here are surfing and sports which i hate and i do go out a lot.

Guess im gonna keep looking for new activities the local art club etc doesn't accept new people for some reason.

Online might be my only chance thanks ^^
30707 cr points
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 1/15/18

irene wrote:

>I hate pubs and will never goto one due to the noise level.
Take noise cancelling ear plugs. Whole box of like 400 for 20$. Cancels out most ambient noise but you can still usually hear when someone is speaking to you. Also pubs aren't inherently loud. Go to a nicer/classier one. Find a jazz or blues club and go there to enjoy the music.

>There are no clubs for interests in the areas or meetup groups on websites etc.
Yes there are. You're not looking hard enough. I never knew my town had any cybersec enthusiasts for years. Then it turns out that we have not only an OWASP chapter, but also a DEFCON group AND a 2600 group. On top of that my area has two universities with tons of clubs that don't care whether you're a student or not.
Try harder, then complain.

>Im trying to find a job but no luck.
Coworkers aren't always friends unless you work at a small business or a restaurant or something. Big companies, you might learn to like 3 people MAX.

Here's some other options:
>join Badoo, enter preference/purpose for finding friends instead of a relationship.
>If there really aren't any meetups for your interests (I still find this hard to believe) then start one yourself. There are people in your situation too.
>You're living with your parents and you're of a legal age to go to a club? The fuck are you doing?! Once you get a job, move out and get yourself a roommate or a few.
>Go to the gym, work out for a bit, find someone else working out alone, ask them to spot you, hit it off from there.
>Saw in a diff post you like computers. Go on craigslist, make an ad to fix computers for a small price or hell, even free. People will come to you for work, you'll meet a lot more people doing something you like and by encountering more people on a daily basis you'll be way more likely to make some friends.

From what I can tell, most people in this thread are either emos/asocials/don't have friends and want to feel better about themselves. Seeing stuff like "online friends are better than IRL friends," "friends are overrated," whatever. This is all bullshit. You can't call up an online friend to go get food together. You can't invite an online friend to celebrate something with you. You can't have an online friend be your best man/bridesmaid at your wedding (assuming you do find a worthwhile partner.) Don't try to pretend that online friends are on any level even close to an IRL friend. I've got lots of online friends, even online friends that live in my city, and a few really close IRL friends, and you can bet your firstborn I will always always always prioritize my IRL friends over my online ones.


1.Might try some ear plugs though i hate jazz and blues well most music tbh but i will do this

2.seeing as i have been looking high and low for 4 years if im not trying hard enough hard enough must be impossible for me because i can't find anything in this country town that i would fit in with.

3. Fair enough

4. I might start up with one and i do live with my parents but that's because i can't find a job over 20% of my town is unemployed with no job opportunities my town is known for high unemployment but i might do the computer fixing idea that would give me something to do thanks ^^
78 cr points
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24 / M / England
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Posted 1/15/18
If you ever find a decent answer to that question mate be sure to let me know
The only way i meet new people is by going to the young farmers meetups but they aren't really my crowd. Nothing against them personally but i think to join you have to marry your cousin if you know what i mean.
157 cr points
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23 / F
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Posted 1/15/18
Same. I have found a few friends who share the same hobby as me, but the friendship doesn't go beyond that. :/ Most of my "friends" are much older because I can't seem to get along with a good majority of my peers. (Not a fan of clubs, bars, parties, staying out past 10 etc)
13403 cr points
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25 / M / Perth, Western Au...
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Posted 1/15/18

Ryulightorb wrote:


irene wrote:

>I hate pubs and will never goto one due to the noise level.
Take noise cancelling ear plugs. Whole box of like 400 for 20$. Cancels out most ambient noise but you can still usually hear when someone is speaking to you. Also pubs aren't inherently loud. Go to a nicer/classier one. Find a jazz or blues club and go there to enjoy the music.

>There are no clubs for interests in the areas or meetup groups on websites etc.
Yes there are. You're not looking hard enough. I never knew my town had any cybersec enthusiasts for years. Then it turns out that we have not only an OWASP chapter, but also a DEFCON group AND a 2600 group. On top of that my area has two universities with tons of clubs that don't care whether you're a student or not.
Try harder, then complain.

>Im trying to find a job but no luck.
Coworkers aren't always friends unless you work at a small business or a restaurant or something. Big companies, you might learn to like 3 people MAX.

Here's some other options:
>join Badoo, enter preference/purpose for finding friends instead of a relationship.
>If there really aren't any meetups for your interests (I still find this hard to believe) then start one yourself. There are people in your situation too.
>You're living with your parents and you're of a legal age to go to a club? The fuck are you doing?! Once you get a job, move out and get yourself a roommate or a few.
>Go to the gym, work out for a bit, find someone else working out alone, ask them to spot you, hit it off from there.
>Saw in a diff post you like computers. Go on craigslist, make an ad to fix computers for a small price or hell, even free. People will come to you for work, you'll meet a lot more people doing something you like and by encountering more people on a daily basis you'll be way more likely to make some friends.

From what I can tell, most people in this thread are either emos/asocials/don't have friends and want to feel better about themselves. Seeing stuff like "online friends are better than IRL friends," "friends are overrated," whatever. This is all bullshit. You can't call up an online friend to go get food together. You can't invite an online friend to celebrate something with you. You can't have an online friend be your best man/bridesmaid at your wedding (assuming you do find a worthwhile partner.) Don't try to pretend that online friends are on any level even close to an IRL friend. I've got lots of online friends, even online friends that live in my city, and a few really close IRL friends, and you can bet your firstborn I will always always always prioritize my IRL friends over my online ones.


1.Might try some ear plugs though i hate jazz and blues well most music tbh but i will do this

2.seeing as i have been looking high and low for 4 years if im not trying hard enough hard enough must be impossible for me because i can't find anything in this country town that i would fit in with.

3. Fair enough

4. I might start up with one and i do live with my parents but that's because i can't find a job over 20% of my town is unemployed with no job opportunities my town is known for high unemployment but i might do the computer fixing idea that would give me something to do thanks ^^


you are so full of bullshittery at this point it is cringeworthy, I message my online friends and we meet up in real life

from what you can tell which is another way of saying I'm going to make assumptions and pretend I'm popular on the internet whilst trying to maintain maximum bullshit

however the other majority of what you said did make sense
30707 cr points
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 1/15/18

ExiAHesP wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


irene wrote:

>I hate pubs and will never goto one due to the noise level.
Take noise cancelling ear plugs. Whole box of like 400 for 20$. Cancels out most ambient noise but you can still usually hear when someone is speaking to you. Also pubs aren't inherently loud. Go to a nicer/classier one. Find a jazz or blues club and go there to enjoy the music.

>There are no clubs for interests in the areas or meetup groups on websites etc.
Yes there are. You're not looking hard enough. I never knew my town had any cybersec enthusiasts for years. Then it turns out that we have not only an OWASP chapter, but also a DEFCON group AND a 2600 group. On top of that my area has two universities with tons of clubs that don't care whether you're a student or not.
Try harder, then complain.

>Im trying to find a job but no luck.
Coworkers aren't always friends unless you work at a small business or a restaurant or something. Big companies, you might learn to like 3 people MAX.

Here's some other options:
>join Badoo, enter preference/purpose for finding friends instead of a relationship.
>If there really aren't any meetups for your interests (I still find this hard to believe) then start one yourself. There are people in your situation too.
>You're living with your parents and you're of a legal age to go to a club? The fuck are you doing?! Once you get a job, move out and get yourself a roommate or a few.
>Go to the gym, work out for a bit, find someone else working out alone, ask them to spot you, hit it off from there.
>Saw in a diff post you like computers. Go on craigslist, make an ad to fix computers for a small price or hell, even free. People will come to you for work, you'll meet a lot more people doing something you like and by encountering more people on a daily basis you'll be way more likely to make some friends.

From what I can tell, most people in this thread are either emos/asocials/don't have friends and want to feel better about themselves. Seeing stuff like "online friends are better than IRL friends," "friends are overrated," whatever. This is all bullshit. You can't call up an online friend to go get food together. You can't invite an online friend to celebrate something with you. You can't have an online friend be your best man/bridesmaid at your wedding (assuming you do find a worthwhile partner.) Don't try to pretend that online friends are on any level even close to an IRL friend. I've got lots of online friends, even online friends that live in my city, and a few really close IRL friends, and you can bet your firstborn I will always always always prioritize my IRL friends over my online ones.


1.Might try some ear plugs though i hate jazz and blues well most music tbh but i will do this

2.seeing as i have been looking high and low for 4 years if im not trying hard enough hard enough must be impossible for me because i can't find anything in this country town that i would fit in with.

3. Fair enough

4. I might start up with one and i do live with my parents but that's because i can't find a job over 20% of my town is unemployed with no job opportunities my town is known for high unemployment but i might do the computer fixing idea that would give me something to do thanks ^^


you are so full of bullshittery at this point it is cringeworthy, I message my online friends and we meet up in real life

from what you can tell which is another way of saying I'm going to make assumptions and pretend I'm popular on the internet whilst trying to maintain maximum bullshit

however the other majority of what you said did make sense


You replying to me or Irene
35 cr points
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F / New Zealand
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Posted 1/15/18
The friends I've made have been through work, University, at the gym in quiet bars, at a cafe. If you go to places like these you'll trigger the friendship quest-lines easy. Though they are random events that are few and far between. Good luck!

I've also found that since my sister has owned a dog she's made lots of friends at the local park wanting to pat him. Lol
13403 cr points
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25 / M / Perth, Western Au...
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Posted 1/15/18 , edited 1/15/18

Ryulightorb wrote:

You replying to me or Irene


quoting you replying to Irene
30707 cr points
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 1/15/18 , edited 1/15/18

ExiAHesP wrote:
quoting you replying to Irene


ohok gotcha haha
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