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A very awkward request
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27 / M / Leanbox, Gameindu...
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Posted 1/10/18 , edited 1/10/18
I mean I'm probably not much better been a few years since my last relationship.

However, as I tell others the key to having a shot at a relationship, especially for someone who is also socially awkward and also agrees that dating apps are complete bs, just get out there and meet people.
Heck, I'm not even talking about the bar or whatever, what I'm saying is get a few social hobbies so that you can meet people with similar interests in the community. Join a club, a volunteer group, church group whatever. You can only increase you odds even if you just make more friends. Heck my parents met through a mutual friend playing D and D, and I met my first ex at a friend's birthday party and another helping her get directions at a bus stop. So basically all I am saying is try to stay out of the house more and get to meet people, also if you are not in shape hit the gym and the rest will eventually follow

1489 cr points
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27 / F / California
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Posted 1/10/18 , edited 1/11/18
How to not get a girlfriend:

1. Refer to women as "females".


Also, if you are miserable and get a girlfriend, you're just going to be miserable with a girlfriend. Work on finding your own happiness. Having a significant other is fine, but don't let that SO or lack of an SO dictate your quality of life.
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Posted 1/10/18 , edited 1/10/18
Relying on any one person for your happiness will always be a bad idea. It really sucks and can make you so miserable honestly.

If you dislike your life, you can't expect someone else to like you more than yourself. Make yourself happy first. It sounds like you already have a lot of good hobbies. I guess try joining meetup groups based on your hobbies? The more you meet and interact with different people, the less socially awkward you'll be, plus you can make friends along the way. Focus on yourself first (education, career, hobbies, etc), meet different people, and life will happen on its own. Besides, you're still really young and have plenty of time.
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28 / M / New Jersey
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18
You will never be happy with someone else unless you will be able to be happy with yourself. It's the worst, most painful advice I can give but at the same time it is true. Unless you can find a way to work on yourself and be happy about things in your life you will continue to see the negatives in everything.
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19 / M / Ottawa, Ontario,...
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18
"Now, why no dating site or App? Because fuck’em, that’s why; just don’t seem like the best avenue for me right now." Well first off youre asking for a girlfriend on an anime site. How bout you go on a dating platform and try your luck there i rekon your chances here are less than 1%. Thank you. Papabless
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27 / F / USA
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18
The biggest turn off for most girls is a desperate guy. Just saying.
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22 / M / US
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18

redasrain wrote:

How to not get a girlfriend:


1. Refer to women as "females".


Also, if you are miserable and get a girlfriend, you're just going to be miserable with a girlfriend. Work on finding your own happiness. Having a significant other is fine, but don't let that SO or lack of an SO dictate your quality of life.

Ok, but why though? As a generic term, what's the difference? In terms of writing a sentence, "women" general flows better, but what's the significant difference?


And we've been through the "I need to make myself happy first;" I'm working on it.
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22 / M / US
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18

Hobomilk wrote:

"Now, why no dating site or App? Because fuck’em, that’s why; just don’t seem like the best avenue for me right now." Well first off youre asking for a girlfriend on an anime site. How bout you go on a dating platform and try your luck there i rekon your chances here are less than 1%. Thank you. Papabless


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uT17W8CmX4g

<1% != 0

But you have a point. To be honest, I didn't really expect this to work out. I'm surprised we're on three pages of comments. Plus, I'm still in college. I have a year and a half left, which is why I'm starting to think about it more now than when I had 4 years left, but it is what is
After, if nothing has come of anything, I'll probably try dating sites. I'll still avoid anything that seems more for "hook-ups" like Tinder, but I'll see. And even then I would prefer just meeting people by going and doing whatever stuff I like to do (which is why I started here)
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33 / M / Ohio
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18
Go outside and declare your intentions.
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23 / AH / Helipad
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18
Step one: proofread.
Step two: go outside (you mentioned you were going to play basketball, so you're off to a good start).
Step three: look for potential girls around you before you try online dating.
Step four: if step three looks bleak then try dating apps, not the Crunchyroll forums.

Also, don't dis Fred.
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27 / F / California
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18

zero356 wrote:


redasrain wrote:

How to not get a girlfriend:

1. Refer to women as "females".

Also, if you are miserable and get a girlfriend, you're just going to be miserable with a girlfriend. Work on finding your own happiness. Having a significant other is fine, but don't let that SO or lack of an SO dictate your quality of life.

Ok, but why though? As a generic term, what's the difference? In terms of writing a sentence, "women" general flows better, but what's the significant difference?

And we've been through the "I need to make myself happy first;" I'm working on it.



It’s dehumanizing, disrespectful, and creepy.
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22 / M
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18

redasrain wrote:


zero356 wrote:


redasrain wrote:

How to not get a girlfriend:

1. Refer to women as "females".

Also, if you are miserable and get a girlfriend, you're just going to be miserable with a girlfriend. Work on finding your own happiness. Having a significant other is fine, but don't let that SO or lack of an SO dictate your quality of life.

Ok, but why though? As a generic term, what's the difference? In terms of writing a sentence, "women" general flows better, but what's the significant difference?

And we've been through the "I need to make myself happy first;" I'm working on it.



It’s dehumanizing, disrespectful, and creepy.

But why is it those things?
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22 / M / US
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/11/18

Potentsaliva wrote:


redasrain wrote:


zero356 wrote:


redasrain wrote:

How to not get a girlfriend:
1. Refer to women as "females".

Also, if you are miserable and get a girlfriend, you're just going to be miserable with a girlfriend. Work on finding your own happiness. Having a significant other is fine, but don't let that SO or lack of an SO dictate your quality of life.


Ok, but why though? As a generic term, what's the difference? In terms of writing a sentence, "women" general flows better, but what's the significant difference?

And we've been through the "I need to make myself happy first;" I'm working on it.




It’s dehumanizing, disrespectful, and creepy.


But why is it those things?


Seconded
Perhaps contextually, but what context?
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23 / AH / Helipad
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Posted 1/11/18 , edited 1/12/18


redasrain wrote:




It’s dehumanizing, disrespectful, and creepy.


Personally, I don't find the term offensive.
1489 cr points
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27 / F / California
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Posted 1/12/18 , edited 1/13/18
As an adjective it's fine, but as a noun it's just gross. It's clinical and creates such an outgroup, it's like you're treating them as a completely different species.

"The female at the store....."
"The group, consisting of some females..."

It's like the verbal equivalent of some gross grabby dudebro being a gross grabby dudebro.

Call me "a female" and I'll come kick you in the nads.
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