First  Prev  175  176  177  178  179  180  181  182  183  184  185  186  187  Next  Last
Post Reply The General Help/Advice Thread
13210 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
18 / F / Australia
Online
Posted 5/25/12

nix96 wrote:

kokorowohiraite wrote;
"Thank you for taking the time to reply! I reply like your response. I've been contemplating the situation and other pieces of advice that I have compiled and decided to do perhaps ask him a common question like "What's the time?" or "What time does the next lesson start?" and then after his response, reply with "By the way my name is.." and initiate a conversation that way and also to show I'm interested. Do you think that is a good approach? "


I think that could be a very good approach. From the initial introduction you can push the conversation (and friendship) a bit forward each day. Particularly if you find out some of his interests and discuss the ones you share.
Most people absolutely love to give advice (as you can tell from thread), so I'm sure he would find it flattering if he were able to give you advice on a subject you both found interesting. The conversation doesn't have to be scripted out, some of the most memorable conversations are actually quite random. The point is to make him (and yourself) more comfortable with each other. When you feel that he and you are comfortable enough you might even ask him to join you at a nearby public place, such as a restaurant to "help you" with a school subject or outside interest, over a cup of coffee or such. Whether either of you consider this a "date" is completely unimportant. The main thing is for each of you to feel secure enough around each other to actually begin to learn enough about the other so that you each can make an informed choice about whether or not to move the relationship forward.

I hope this helps and I truly hope you two find what you're both looking for,

Steve


nix96 
47456 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
50 / M / Asheville , North...
Offline
Posted 5/25/12
@kokorowohiraite wrote: Thank you for taking your time to reply with a well thought out response! There is one problem though. Him and I have similar characters in a way since we are both the awkward/shy type.
I am terrible, honestly, my temperature rises and I can feel my face burning, my palms get sweaty, I feel all giddy inside and can feel massive knots in my stomach. Not only would I stutter, I know I'd be excessively awkward and derpy. I know that I have to find the courage to initiate something by myself but it's quite difficult for me especially since I have next to no experience with doing something like this. .__. /le sigh
I am trying to gain the courage though C:


Just a quick note that may help. That nervous, awkward feeling; nearly everyone feels that. However for a bit of extra encouragement just remember, no matter what happens, it's a win for you. Proving to yourself that you have the courage to go through with an introduction and conversation may be far more important than a possible relationship. While it might not seem that way in the moment, trust me, it is. In the long run the very thing that holds most people back is simply, themselves. You can be much better than that. After all you had to the courage to post a personal problem here in public. That's a big step in itself.I know you can do whatever you set your mind to, just the same as all the folks here who've taken chances in their personal life will attest. Never confuse courage with fearlessness; courage is acting when you have legitimate fear.... fearlessness is the idiot that's not scared of the oncoming truck. I think you're bright enough to see the difference
4330 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
19 / F / HK
Offline
Posted 5/26/12
ehhh what should I do if I still like a guy I haven't talked to in 8 monthes?
And I know he has liked me at some point, but I don't know if he still does?
And I can't even look him in the eyes... :S
1038 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
F / Texas
Offline
Posted 5/28/12

underlock wrote:

No way he liked you romantically.

If you can't get rid of it after 2 years I recommend sitting down and having a nice talk with him. He heard you out for a good period, didn't he? One more time won't hurt.

Next time have someone of the same gender to help you psychologically. It's a female thing to think a guy likes them just because they listen and help ya.


O.o...you... Being... Nice? (kinda)
I must be dreaming
Posted 5/28/12

PinkLollipopGirl wrote:


underlock wrote:

No way he liked you romantically.

If you can't get rid of it after 2 years I recommend sitting down and having a nice talk with him. He heard you out for a good period, didn't he? One more time won't hurt.

Next time have someone of the same gender to help you psychologically. It's a female thing to think a guy likes them just because they listen and help ya.


O.o...you... Being... Nice? (kinda)
I must be dreaming


A couple of weeks before I hacked this account from that sucker.
4672 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / F / NYC
Offline
Posted 5/28/12
I just want a little advice....

Posted 5/28/12
It's pretty obvious that you should dump him while you can. No friendship, just tell him to fuck off.

Keep him = you get dumped later.
Be friends = he'll keep using you.

Become strangers. Good luck and remember that women are better off without men.
Posted 5/28/12

Catz1297 wrote:

ehhh what should I do if I still like a guy I haven't talked to in 8 monthes?
And I know he has liked me at some point, but I don't know if he still does?
And I can't even look him in the eyes... :S



If you can't look him in the eyes, that means you aren't ready for anything. It means, you can't ask him if he likes you still. It also means that you will never know.
Posted 5/28/12 , edited 5/28/12
Why does my nose keep bleeding? I know it's certainly not my fingers.

And there is no way I am kidding on this one. Heck, I'd rely on Google, but that site irritates my pants off more than most of you people do.

I am serious. Do you guys ever get random bloody noses, even though it's not humid? Just random bloody noses that last for a bit and then consecutively comes back within an hour? How about those times where blood just keeps strolling out from your nostrils- not only for fifteen minutes, but for an hour or so? (You don't even need to dig into your nose to get a bloody nose!) Yeah, tell me about it. I hate drinking water just to make up for it. But, because I am a good person, I do it to benefit myself.

I also know that this is not because of seasonal changes; how the heck does that even affect me? I mean, I get them not because of the season changes, but I just get them. Maybe I have cancer or something. ROFL, I am kidding. No, I am just kidding. Maybe it is just because of the seasonal changes. I mean, if a rainy day can affect my mood, I am sure a sunny day can erupt my blood. And then a super cold day can freeze my blood....and squeeze it out from my nostrils? What? :o
Posted 5/28/12
Oh, maybe a more serious question would do. Okay, so I've been talking to a lot of counselors, family members and friends about college careers for awhile now, but they've all given me the same answer: follow your heart.

Well, I wish it would be that simple. Follow my heart. Follow my heart? Alright, let's step back a bit here; I can't read my heart. I don't know what my heart is saying other than it beating. I am just saying that I don't know what my heart wants, either. My mind..what does my mind tell me? It's telling me, "choose something or die now, you pathetic fool!"-- yeah, I like that a lot. And I am telling myself, "maybe I do have something that I want to do in my near future, but I am just afraid to say it out loud", but when I think about it, I don't. I don't have anything. I don't know what to do with my life. I have absolutely no idea what I am living for other than to search for a future. Do I get money for that? Am I happy about searching for my future? No, but I am sure it pays a lot of relief to myself.

Alright, I have been pressured from my parents to either be a nurse, or pick cans from the street (as a joke, of course), or take over their farm (which I indubitably hate, so that's off the chart). I am left with nursing. I don't mind nursing. Sure it's a lot of work, but what isn't a lot of work? I got my education for something worthy, not something to complain about. However, I don't want to go for nursing just because my parents are pressuring me, or just because it's better than the penultimates. I don't want to be a nurse. Not because I am lazy, but because I don't have good interaction skills. I am not good at maths. I am not strong with people. Okay, I just don't want to be a nurse. I can already see myself dying during the process.

My friends and siblings are saying I should go into music (professional singing). Look for people who are scouting as well and join. Fight my way in. Join all of those television shows, or do recordings and see what happens. I wish it were that simple, but I honestly don't want to be a singer. I don't like crowds of people. I don't like performing, I like watching. Also, I have no passion for it.

My teachers are all recommending me to go for art. First of all, I don't even know what most of the art things that they have mentioned are. Sometimes, I have to look up what cross-hatching really is or looks like. And to be honest, I use cross-hatching all the time! So, they want me to be an artist? Secondly, I hate deadlines and I am not really motivated to do art things. Thirdly, as I have mentioned before, I have no passion for art.

So, those are just the three inquiries that have stumbled upon me. My main question now: for those of you who didn't know what to do with your lives after high school, how did you overcome it?-- Whether you did know, but you were afraid to state it; whether you didn't know but you still managed to make a good living; how did you find yourself?

Damn, I've never typed so much just because I am frustrated at myself.
3193 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
F
Offline
Posted 5/28/12

D01BCDN3 wrote:

Oh, maybe a more serious question would do. Okay, so I've been talking to a lot of counselors, family members and friends about college careers for awhile now, but they've all given me the same answer: follow your heart.

Well, I wish it would be that simple. Follow my heart. Follow my heart? Alright, let's step back a bit here; I can't read my heart. I don't know what my heart is saying other than it beating. I am just saying that I don't know what my heart wants, either. My mind..what does my mind tell me? It's telling me, "choose something or die now, you pathetic fool!"-- yeah, I like that a lot. And I am telling myself, "maybe I do have something that I want to do in my near future, but I am just afraid to say it out loud", but when I think about it, I don't. I don't have anything. I don't know what to do with my life. I have absolutely no idea what I am living for other than to search for a future. Do I get money for that? Am I happy about searching for my future? No, but I am sure it pays a lot of relief to myself.

Alright, I have been pressured from my parents to either be a nurse, or pick cans from the street (as a joke, of course), or take over their farm (which I indubitably hate, so that's off the chart). I am left with nursing. I don't mind nursing. Sure it's a lot of work, but what isn't a lot of work? I got my education for something worthy, not something to complain about. However, I don't want to go for nursing just because my parents are pressuring me, or just because it's better than the penultimates. I don't want to be a nurse. Not because I am lazy, but because I don't have good interaction skills. I am not good at maths. I am not strong with people. Okay, I just don't want to be a nurse. I can already see myself dying during the process.

My friends and siblings are saying I should go into music (professional singing). Look for people who are scouting as well and join. Fight my way in. Join all of those television shows, or do recordings and see what happens. I wish it were that simple, but I honestly don't want to be a singer. I don't like crowds of people. I don't like performing, I like watching. Also, I have no passion for it.

My teachers are all recommending me to go for art. First of all, I don't even know what most of the art things that they have mentioned are. Sometimes, I have to look up what cross-hatching really is or looks like. And to be honest, I use cross-hatching all the time! So, they want me to be an artist? Secondly, I hate deadlines and I am not really motivated to do art things. Thirdly, as I have mentioned before, I have no passion for art.

So, those are just the three inquiries that have stumbled upon me. My main question now: for those of you who didn't know what to do with your lives after high school, how did you overcome it?-- Whether you did know, but you were afraid to state it; whether you didn't know but you still managed to make a good living; how did you find yourself?

Damn, I've never typed so much just because I am frustrated at myself.


I haven't started high school yet, but I think the question you need to ask yourself first is how you want to live. Do you want to live in a small apartment with a roommate or live in a house with a family or have a good size apartment for yourself. After that, think about what you like and enjoy doing. Do you like numbers? Do you like teaching? Do you like arguing. Ask yourself questions. After that, decide which jobs would lead you to your ideal life. Hope this helps... even though I have no idea what I'm doing. I just hope it helps you find an answer.
Posted 5/28/12

SHRKPM wrote:

I haven't started high school yet, but I think the question you need to ask yourself first is how you want to live. Do you want to live in a small apartment with a roommate or live in a house with a family or have a good size apartment for yourself. After that, think about what you like and enjoy doing. Do you like numbers? Do you like teaching? Do you like arguing. Ask yourself questions. After that, decide which jobs would lead you to your ideal life. Hope this helps... even though I have no idea what I'm doing. I just hope it helps you find an answer.


I ask myself those questions all the time, but I've always concluded to nothing.

Oh, but I want to live by myself someday, away from the corrupted world. Nah, I am kidding. I want a family, just not until I am successful....but that depends on how successful I will be.

And I like none of those............Not saying that I don't like anything. I like many things, but I just don't love anything.
3193 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
F
Offline
Posted 5/28/12

D01BCDN3 wrote:


SHRKPM wrote:

I haven't started high school yet, but I think the question you need to ask yourself first is how you want to live. Do you want to live in a small apartment with a roommate or live in a house with a family or have a good size apartment for yourself. After that, think about what you like and enjoy doing. Do you like numbers? Do you like teaching? Do you like arguing. Ask yourself questions. After that, decide which jobs would lead you to your ideal life. Hope this helps... even though I have no idea what I'm doing. I just hope it helps you find an answer.


I ask myself those questions all the time, but I've always concluded to nothing.

Oh, but I want to live by myself someday, away from the corrupted world. Nah, I am kidding. I want a family, just not until I am successful....but that depends on how successful I will be.

And I like none of those............Not saying that I don't like anything. I like many things, but I just don't love anything.


xD You don't love anything? That just says you aren't mature enough. lol Why don't you just focus on getting a mediocre job? Like a job at McDonalds or Burger King first. All you really need right now is time to think about what you want. I have no idea how old you are, but right now, if you are in college, why don't you just get your undergraduate classes over with. You don't have to decide right now. What I think might help you is looking at different perspectives. Right now, you're probably just stuck. So, just imagine to your heart's content. I think I'm very much like you. When people ask what I want to be when I grow up, I could never give a response because I don't have anything I truly have a passion for. I just live from day to day. People also tell me to go into art, but I don't have any passion for it. When you come down to it, I think that you'll do something completely different from what you are now. I'm sorry if I'm not any help and repetitive. xP
Posted 5/28/12

SHRKPM wrote:

xD You don't love anything? That just says you aren't mature enough. lol Why don't you just focus on getting a mediocre job? Like a job at McDonalds or Burger King first. All you really need right now is time to think about what you want. I have no idea how old you are, but right now, if you are in college, why don't you just get your undergraduate classes over with. You don't have to decide right now. What I think might help you is looking at different perspectives. Right now, you're probably just stuck. So, just imagine to your heart's content. I think I'm very much like you. When people ask what I want to be when I grow up, I could never give a response because I don't have anything I truly have a passion for. I just live from day to day. People also tell me to go into art, but I don't have any passion for it. When you come down to it, I think that you'll do something completely different from what you are now. I'm sorry if I'm not any help and repetitive. xP


Meh, I am very immature; you've no idea. Or, I just lack a lot of sentiments. It's not that you're no help, I actually think you're a lot of help (thank you very much, by the way), but in this predicament, you're floating on the same boat as I am. I am telling you, I was you back then. I told myself to just stay calm, get a job at McDonald's or Burger King and work with my generals and then find my dream job. As you can see, I am still concrete stuck. And to be honest, I help out at my parents' farm, which demotes my chances of getting an actual job. I am really stuck. I even signed my major as nursing. ROFL. I love myself way too much....
3193 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
F
Offline
Posted 5/28/12

D01BCDN3 wrote:


SHRKPM wrote:

xD You don't love anything? That just says you aren't mature enough. lol Why don't you just focus on getting a mediocre job? Like a job at McDonalds or Burger King first. All you really need right now is time to think about what you want. I have no idea how old you are, but right now, if you are in college, why don't you just get your undergraduate classes over with. You don't have to decide right now. What I think might help you is looking at different perspectives. Right now, you're probably just stuck. So, just imagine to your heart's content. I think I'm very much like you. When people ask what I want to be when I grow up, I could never give a response because I don't have anything I truly have a passion for. I just live from day to day. People also tell me to go into art, but I don't have any passion for it. When you come down to it, I think that you'll do something completely different from what you are now. I'm sorry if I'm not any help and repetitive. xP


Meh, I am very immature; you've no idea. Or, I just lack a lot of sentiments. It's not that you're no help, I actually think you're a lot of help (thank you very much, by the way), but in this predicament, you're floating on the same boat as I am. I am telling you, I was you back then. I told myself to just stay calm, get a job at McDonald's or Burger King and work with my generals and then find my dream job. As you can see, I am still concrete stuck. And to be honest, I help out at my parents' farm, which demotes my chances of getting an actual job. I am really stuck. I even signed my major as nursing. ROFL. I love myself way too much....


Are you saying I'm screwed? D: xD jk Do you like farming? lol Why don't you volunteer at nursing homes or something. It'd be fun... changing an old man's diaper. [i love myself like crazy too. xD]
First  Prev  175  176  177  178  179  180  181  182  183  184  185  186  187  Next  Last
You must be logged in to post.