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Post Reply The General Help/Advice Thread
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22 / M
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Posted 7/20/12 , edited 7/20/12
I ask on a friend's behalf, a male friend of mine was traumatized by pornography when he was 12 and had a scary mother, now he is in need to calm down by select images of certain manga/anime girls (and a few real girls he knows) when saddened, as he mentioned they have the ma...ma... effect on him.

The problem is, he thinks hes becoming a pervert because of the combination of the above and won't risk expressing his need for comfort for he thinks he will be a monster if he does, how can I help him out?
72438 cr points
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Posted 7/20/12

SonicGenesisKing wrote:

I ask on a friend's behalf, a male friend of mine was traumatized by pornography when he was 12 and had a scary mother, now he is in need to calm down by select images of certain manga/anime girls (and a few real girls he knows) when saddened, as he mentioned they have the ma...ma... effect on him.

The problem is, he thinks hes becoming a pervert because of the combination of the above and won't risk expressing his need for comfort for he thinks he will be a monster if he does, how can I help him out?


What your "friend" needs is professional help, rather than some advice from teenagers that he doesn't even know.
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17 / F
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Posted 7/22/12 , edited 7/23/12

CaityOCat wrote:

anyone here ever try a therapist?


I still have problems & I attend therapy biweekly (which is every 2 weeks btw, not every 2 days a week *facepalm*)
I have problems everywhere. Online. Irl.
They just don't seem to go away.
The last few weeks were going smoothly.
Business as usual.
Until someone decided it'd be fun to nuke my favorite thread.
Now my problem is that I'm constantly bored, have absolutely nothing to do, and no irl friend contact info (because I'm a shy bitch. It took me a few months just to actually have a full conversation with my new schoolmates. Because, like my old schools, i feared that they'd judge me. I know, I'm an idiot with lacking social skills. I don't want to hear it.)
So now I'm almost 16, bored, and a loner.
How wonderful. Just what I wanted to be when I grew up! *sobs*
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27 / M / Gotham City
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Posted 7/23/12

animegirl2222 wrote:

I still have problems & I attend therapy biweekly (which is every 2 weeks btw, not every 2 days a week *facepalm*)
I have problems everywhere. Online. Irl.
They just don't seem to go away.
The last few weeks were going smoothly.
Business as usual.
Until someone decided it'd be fun to nuke my favorite thread.
Now my problem is that I'm constantly bored, have absolutely nothing to do, and no irl friend contact info (because I'm a shy bitch. It took me a few months just to actually have a full conversation with my new schoolmates. Because, like my old schools, i feared that they'd judge me. I know, I'm an idiot with lacking social skills. I don't want to hear it.)
So now I'm almost 16, bored, and a loner.
How wonderful. Just what I wanted to be when I grew up! *sobs*


Which was your thread? If a mod deleted or moved it, perhaps it was because it was a duplicate.

As for your current struggles with your social life, communicating with people, and making friends, that's really tough. What events/conditions do you think contributed to how shy you are today? Is it an issue with confidence?

It's going to be hard not to be judged, almost all the time, when someone is looking at you they are sizing you up, measuring you, and forming an opinion of you. When I was in elementary school I was actually a really quiet and shy boy, I was very introspective and I hated giving public speeches or presentations in front of the class because it was so terrifying.

Like most things, practice made it easier and easier for me, to the point where I eventually became pretty good at being outgoing and public speaking, and the more I improved the more confident I became. It was baby steps for me.

You're not an idiot for lacking social skills. I bet you have a lot of qualities that would make you an awesome friend, and would make people want to be around you and seek your friendship. You just need to believe in yourself.
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24 / F / San Francisco
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Posted 7/24/12

Savio_no_Shiva wrote:

This is kind of an ongoing thing but I've been trying to make more friends with people that like animes and also make some friends on CR. I don't really know how to go about it on CR, I've been joining groups and commenting on news posts. Does anyone have any ways or can give me any sort of advice because I feel like I'm doing something wrong like thinking too hard or that there's something wrong with me?


There's absolutely nothing wrong with you.

I have been doing the SAME thing, and barely have met anyone on the forums, and I fricken work here ~ !!! I think you should quote people more. Also, I'll be your friend ~ !!! <3
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Posted 7/25/12
Oh my goodness, I was surprised that SailorBee added me as a friend on CR today.
I was like "Hmm isn't this the awesome cosplayer I followed on tumblr?"
and sure enough, it was!

I wanna tell her that I really like her Hikaru cosplay, without being too creepy by sending a her a pm.
So hopefully she see's this.

On another note, I won Day 3 of the Pocky Contest I said I entered earlier!
:D a beautiful giant box filled with pocky was safely received.

My photo:
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150980959984340&set=a.134680839339.109987.6047074339&type=1&ref=nf
The numbers of likes on that photo is astounding (^^;; especially compared to likes I got to win haha...)
Is this the power of publicity? x.x
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27 / M / Gotham City
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Posted 7/25/12

SailorBee wrote:


There's absolutely nothing wrong with you.

I have been doing the SAME thing, and barely have met anyone on the forums, and I fricken work here ~ !!! I think you should quote people more. Also, I'll be your friend ~ !!! <3


*waves


kawaiicelia wrote:

On another note, I won Day 3 of the Pocky Contest I said I entered earlier!
:D a beautiful giant box filled with pocky was safely received.


Congrats on your delicious win and reward.
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22 / M / United Kingdom
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Posted 7/25/12 , edited 7/25/12

SailorBee wrote:



There's absolutely nothing wrong with you.

I have been doing the SAME thing, and barely have met anyone on the forums, and I fricken work here ~ !!! I think you should quote people more. Also, I'll be your friend ~ !!! <3



Thanks, SailorBee.

I'm glad it's not just me having the same problem. I'll try that and see how it goes.
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21 / M / CA
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Posted 7/26/12


dear sailorbee you work for crunchyroll and you cosplay pretty well; people should be lining up to be your friend haha to ask YOU for advice on stuff and ill be your friend i recently moved to CA so i know its not easy making friends
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21 / M / CA
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Posted 7/26/12


i see you live in LA and this is besides the point but i saw where you can get those Giant Pocky at a japanese store i found near LA haha it makes me want to go buy it
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21 / M / CA
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Posted 7/26/12


for the first thing submit it to your friends here and see what they think or submit it to an amateurs writers site. if you see any condescending comments delete it and other than that you should take it as criticism. the only thing i can say is that the things in it might be a little dark and some wont like it but here on the brightside recently a large amount of people have shown that they like Dark stuff so you just gotta take a chance.

this is gonna sound a little harsh but everyone dies and i know you dont want the apocalypse so take heart that there are a few things you can do. 1 live your life, enjoy the time you have, and ignore the end. 2. prepare for the worst by spending everyday gathering supplies and formulating a plan on survival for anything. or 3. a mix of both. enjoy your life but be ready for anything because well like i said everyone dies. the best thing you can do before any end of your time is to enjoy life.

everyones in between sometimes. you can grow up or stay a child thats what some people say but well i say be both. i know youve prolly heard of the term im a kid at heart or if not you have now. that just means although we grow up and age there are things we do that remind us of our inner child such as grown men who play video games like theyre still 10. everyone has an inner child even if they grow up so i say make wise decisions growing up and dont forget your inner child cause personally i think thats how people become grumpy haha

i hope i helped if not best of luck to you man

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22 / M
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Posted 7/26/12

laoboix wrote:



for the first thing submit it to your friends here and see what they think or submit it to an amateurs writers site. if you see any condescending comments delete it and other than that you should take it as criticism. the only thing i can say is that the things in it might be a little dark and some wont like it but here on the brightside recently a large amount of people have shown that they like Dark stuff so you just gotta take a chance.

this is gonna sound a little harsh but everyone dies and i know you dont want the apocalypse so take heart that there are a few things you can do. 1 live your life, enjoy the time you have, and ignore the end. 2. prepare for the worst by spending everyday gathering supplies and formulating a plan on survival for anything. or 3. a mix of both. enjoy your life but be ready for anything because well like i said everyone dies. the best thing you can do before any end of your time is to enjoy life.

everyones in between sometimes. you can grow up or stay a child thats what some people say but well i say be both. i know youve prolly heard of the term im a kid at heart or if not you have now. that just means although we grow up and age there are things we do that remind us of our inner child such as grown men who play video games like theyre still 10. everyone has an inner child even if they grow up so i say make wise decisions growing up and dont forget your inner child cause personally i think thats how people become grumpy haha

i hope i helped if not best of luck to you man



Thank you, I should have clarified that I don't fear Death on a small scale, but mass extinction.... no.... needless to say I think I'll stick with the TV ending of Evangelion rather than the movie...
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21 / M / CA
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Posted 7/26/12


haha i see and the ending to that seems appropriate due to the circumstances and i wouldnt mind it either
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22 / M
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Posted 7/26/12

laoboix wrote:


haha i see and the ending to that seems appropriate due to the circumstances and i wouldnt mind it either


Finally, someone agrees with me on which ending makes more sense and more balanced! BTW one of the characters in my story is named Balancia for a reason!
Ah, what the shell, I'm posting my work once in a while here on Crunchyroll!
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21 / M / CA
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Posted 7/26/12

SonicGenesisKing wrote:


laoboix wrote:


haha i see and the ending to that seems appropriate due to the circumstances and i wouldnt mind it either


Finally, someone agrees with me on which ending makes more sense and more balanced! BTW one of the characters in my story is named Balancia for a reason!
Ah, what the shell, I'm posting my work once in a while here on Crunchyroll!


well i mean in that anime its appropriate since well in order to experience life there is pain and their is joy
to be honest personally i want to end my life in my sleep or saving someone i care about. as for the end of the world i dont want it to happen but if it does i want it to be short sweet and instant so no pain and no suffering but who knows
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15 / M / Dublin (Ireland)
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Posted 7/27/12
Is 11eyes good 2 watch cause i saw the 1st episode and it looks confusing
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