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Loners
218 cr points
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30 / M
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Posted 3/6/12

abel89 wrote:
"you can't get stabbed in the back if there's no one behind you"


That's a good one, i'll remember that forever.

I have always been a loner in my opinion. I always hesitated to make any friends when i was a youngster because of the fears i have, and in recent years, those fears became a reality.

I prefer not to have any close friends anymore mainly because they use you. You cannot imagine the number of people who just wanna be your friend because of your fat wallet and the amount of people who will end up owing you money as well. I've put my life on the line for a lot of people who i didn't realize were not worth it until it was too late. And recently my girlfriend left me because i wasn't spending as much anymore. But all in honest i feel good now, and that quote above is perfect. There's no one behind me anymore so no one can stab me anymore and i rather much keep it that way, probably for life since it doesn't seem to be a problem for me anymore.
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23 / M / San Antonio, TX, USA
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Posted 3/12/12
As a child I was always considered different cause i was diagnosed with Aspergers & Depression (even in some tests I was considered a very different amongst others ), I befriended a few people but basically we were all loners in a group dealing with constant bullying & so on till we graduated in high school where as the other 6 of my friends blended in more .I'm still considered different over time I exiled myself from people for about 2 1/2 years then went to college & repeating the same process currently ,

I am also one who is caught up in many "crossfires" .... I prefer to be alone or with few people even amongst family . it leaves me room to think ..but sometimes ..I crave contact but I also fear the treachery in humans ,Yet I still believe in human kindness.....where ever its at. I don't speak much either I sometimes uses hand signals to speak . On The year I was on campus I still felt out of place amongst the vast amounts of people though I have always said to myself "Even the strangest of things have some value" .
kyogaa 
26540 cr points
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23 / M / Michigan
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Posted 3/13/12
Interesting thread. You could say I've always been a loner, even though I've had tons of friends throughout my life. My problem is that I keep everyone at arms length, and try too hard to be accepted by other people. Not to mention I kinda grew up a forced shut-in, so I spent most of my time in high school at home gaming, watching movies, etc.

After actually being in solitude for a couple years now, I have to say that it feels just as crappy as having a ton of acquaintances with no true friends. I think there's a difference between a loner and someone who feels lonely... If I learned anything from this thread, that'd probably be it.
Posted 3/31/12
How long have you been a loner? forever (sounds emo i know but i tend to always feel like im alone even with other people)
Did you give up on people? (not really... i still have faith in some..i just choose to be alone sometimes)
if so, why? you can't have too many friends
What do you generally dislike about them? i have trust issues
How well does it suit you? pretty alright surprisingly.
276 cr points
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19 / M / In My World
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Posted 4/30/12
strength and solitude are side by side...
Posted 5/3/12

abel89 wrote:

I'm pretty sure there are many people here with a good amount of friends, and that's cool and all

But I want to learn more about the loners here, and since there are 2 anti gender threads, it only makes sense to have an anti people thread as well.

How long have you been a loner?
Did you give up on people?
if so, why?
What do you generally dislike about them
How well does it suit you?

As a child I had very few friends and the few I had were questionable, I grew up looking white in a black neighborhood in the south, I was quite lonely back then and quite sad and at the time was despeerate for friends, to the point that I'd be overjoyed everytime someone offered to hang out with me, even when they were just using me as something to keep them busy before their real friends arrived and I'd be cast to the side, or lead into a group of kids so they could make fun of me, or worse.....

As I got a little older I became disgusted at what I was, a weak minded sycophant basically, so I quickly realized that people in general were fake and untrustworthy, and that I didn't need or want them hanging around me.

Today, I can say that I have never had a real friend, and that I keep myself guarded and on alert for liars and sluts and potential back stabbers, I trust the intention of a person trying to kill me more then that of a person who walks up to me with a smile on their face, at least then I can counteract those intentions with a proper response easily, as I like to say.......

"you can't get stabbed in the back if there's no one behind you"


I gave people chances once and they gave me the opportunity to see their true faces; selfishness.

This is why I have hibernated for 5 years. I have let go of my past and I'm starting anew. I hope to not make the same mistakes or involve myself in such stupidity again.
Posted 5/5/12
I tend to be alone too sometimes, be it by choice or because I was left out. Sometimes I prefer to be alone, because I enjoy writing and drawing.
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18 / M / Holland,MI
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Posted 5/13/12

PepperKillsPepsi wrote:


Animefreak9999 wrote:

I gave up at times. I felt truly scared of talking because I was always worried if people couldn't understand me. I felt I was a mistake to my family at times. My siblings had and still have friends. I never had true friends in the past. I have few now but I question if I can even be friends with them. It's difficult for me to open at times. I fear being ignored.

I'm currently a freshmen and I'm trying to open up but people from elementary and middle school are preventing me indirectly. I feel I'm trapped in a birdcage without a lock. I can only see the outside world but I can't reach it. I feel it will take me some time to be finally happy.



I'm exactly the same. At least we know we're not alone.


(I'm sorry for giving such a late reply.) It's nice to know I'm not the only one. I wonder what has happened in your life. If you want to tell me, please do so.
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25 / M / California
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Posted 5/14/12 , edited 5/14/12
How long have you been a loner?
-Forever? I never had parents so my grandmother raised me. My immediately family has issues, so I was never interested in immersing myself deeply in any group situation. I get along well with my grandma and I am fiercely protective of her, but many of my other relatives rub me the wrong way. My upbringing has affected me in a lot of significant ways. I find it hard to trust people who have not gone through things or proven themselves to me. I am often told I think like an old person or that I seem older than I am. I plan to never start a family of my own, and I find relationships to be too messy for my liking. I generally place more value on friends than family.

Did you give up on people?
-No. I have good friends. They understand that they have to give me space sometimes. Partying, drinking, raving, clubbing, and going out is fun and all, but at the end of the day, I need alone time to recharge. Being in close physical proximity with other people for long periods of time drains the spirit and energy out of me. It really is very taxing, and I wish more people would take the time to know an introvert. My good friends usually know when to drag me out and when to let me stay by myself. I like to feel loved as much as the next guy, but me-time is a necessity. I may or may not be alone, I may or may not be lonely, but I have always seen myself as a loner. I have a nasty habit of vanishing completely off the grid at times, for up to a week per disappearance. During these times, I talk to nobody and ignore efforts to contact me. Despite this, the relationship that I have with my friends is very precious to me.

if so, why?
^

What do you generally dislike about them?
-I dislike how people judge others based on appearance and unfounded personal beliefs. I know it's human nature, but it still irks me. People oversimplify and perceive wrongly. I've gotten to know many people who appear messed up on the outside. They're the type of people who are problem children, like getting tattoos, doing drugs, etc. But many of them really are fine, caring, genuine folks. Others who appear great on the outside (great academic achievements, stable jobs and good family background) are often some of the worst people. I also dislike how unforgiving and petty some people can be. I, of course, have been cruel and stone-hearted before, but I never harbor these deep grudges unless I've been wronged in a big way.


How well does it suit you?
-Fine. Even if it sucked, I'd have no choice but to deal with it because I was always an introvert. When it comes down to it, though, I'm glad I am this way. I tend to pick up a lot of things that other people glaze over and miss. I am particularly good at sensing negative emotions. Because I express my personal concerns, or my worries about my friends, to my friends without trying to put on a 'manly' front, I know some of them think I am soft. However, they really appreciate it when they're not happy and I show them that I notice their unhappiness. My female friends, in particular, seem to dig this trait.

One weird quirk is that I am fine when I am allowed to interact and bond with people on my own, but I will reject 'forced' situations. I don't like being paired with people or forced to be in a group, especially if I am the newest member of the group.
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20 / F / Wherever the wind...
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Posted 5/18/12
How long have you been a loner?
I don't know.

Did you give up on people?
No. But I gave up on exerting any effort to like and be liked by them.

What do you generally dislike about them?

Them forcing their beliefs and opinions on you. And if your own beliefs and opinions clash with theirs, they make the hasty conclusion that you are challenging them and that you are an ass.

Another is that they talk too much about themselves and expect you to throw a couple of false compliments for their ego's sake. The devastating part is that you have to seem like you care or else they'll ask the question "Wtf is wrong with you?" To which, we can all agree, is too much of a bother to answer.

I'm not saying I'm not guilty of this stuff I'm ranting about. It's just that I find it all too bothersome to go through. I don't think it's all worth it and that I'd rather exert all my time and effort to other things I find enjoyable and rewarding. I have a number of close friends(who totally understands and are ok with my loner issues) and I'm good with people. I'm just too lazy to exert too much effort.

How well does it suit you?

Perfectly. I am most productive when my social life is close to non-existence. Being in solitude makes you realize a lot of things. I think it's because no one's influencing you. Just yourself and your observations. Man, that's just so freaking fun.
4330 cr points
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19 / F / HK
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Posted 5/25/12
I'm not a loner... but I do have a problem with people in general

umm... well when I was little I used to be bullied because I was pretty much the only asian kid in my school, not to mention chubby and a tomboy. Well.... I wasn't bullied. I was ignored and used for my homework. well... no, I wasn't ignored. I just so happened to move to another school for one year and that year was apparently the year everyone split into cliques. and I was like WHAATTT? aha

So in high school I attended a 50% asian school. But too bad it was 49% KOREAN. and srry but koreans stick to themselves, and me being Canadian born Chinese, my friends tended to be chinese and white. (There's like no black people in my school- im not racist)
ahh but every year I get in fights with my "friends" and I end up switching groups... But ironically, I switch "up" the social ranks, not down. but I've only had one constant friend from freshman year to now.. So yea. all in all, im bad at keeping friends, but im never alone.

I still hate people though. I'm pretty sure if I weren't as vain as I am now, I wouldn't mind going full loner...
62 cr points
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24 / M / Everywhere
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Posted 5/29/12
I gave up on people after seeing how common, boring and repetitive the human race is.
2083 cr points
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21 / M / Northern California
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Posted 5/30/12
How long have you been a loner?
Forever. I prefer to be alone or in a small click.
Did you give up on people?
Most people.
If so, why?
No much loyal people nowadays.
What do you generally dislike about them?
They're too common.
How well does it suit you?
What does that means? I just like being myself.
Selden 
16075 cr points
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23 / M / Ered Gorgoroth
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Posted 6/2/12 , edited 6/2/12
I've always had a close group of friends, and was always the first ready to go home as a child. Now days I only have regular contact with one person, and she is all I really need. I consider myself a loner, but I do not consider myself a hermit. They are two very different things. I can go into society and interact if I must and there is no fear in doing so, it's just I prefer not to. When I need to be vocal I am (work place or school), and I am quite confident in my communication skills. It's just I prefer not to use them.

I've never held modern society in a good light. I have hope in some people. People in general are not the problem. Society (people at large) have caused the problem, but it can be fixed. I would prefer if society improves and will make an effort to improve it, but I don't identify myself with the majority. I watch and pick my acquaintances after careful thought, and rarely open up to them.

I dislike the views circulating pop culture. The ideas of beauty, the trendy post-modern garbage being spewed by "artists" and writers of all sorts, the state of many governments throughout the world, the state of the people who are fed up with said governments, the ideas of relationships circulating through society, the ideas of the sciences floating through most peoples minds, and most ideas regarding religion. All of them I dislike quite a bit. Of course I can find pockets of humanity who share the same ideals I have, and I do engage in activities with these people. But we can only agree on a certain number of views, and I am a picky person. I have only found one who matches my views of the world, and that is enough for me.

I am suited quite well for this life I believe. I don't engage in the frivolities of parties, nor do I go into the city for a night out. I spend my time at home writing, knitting, learning about a myriad of things, playing games of all sorts, or conversing with my dear friend. I go to the grocery store, I go to the bookstore, I go to work, I go to the coffee shop, or I go to the mall, but I don't go to actively engage with society more than I need to. That to me a loner, and I will enjoy my time as one.
2393 cr points
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20 / M / In Rainbows
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Posted 6/20/12
since sperm....
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