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Post Reply The Aftermath.....
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30 / M / Missouri, USA
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Posted 4/25/08
Good job, Okina. Although....being the somewhat obnoxiously nit-picky person that I am....I could not help but notice a slight mistake that you made in the story. While Okina was the only one that could equal the Oniwaban leader (okashira) before Aoshi and was indeed next in line to to be the next leader, he had refused the position and instead recommended Aoshi. Another interesting bit of information that some of you may not be aware of or forgot is that Misao is the granddaughter of the okashira before Aoshi. In any case.........aside from that somewhat minor mistake, you did a great job. b(^_^)
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Posted 4/27/08
its really good okina-san i like it
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Posted 4/28/08

Swamp_Fox wrote:

Good job, Okina. Although....being the somewhat obnoxiously nit-picky person that I am....I could not help but notice a slight mistake that you made in the story. While Okina was the only one that could equal the Oniwaban leader (okashira) before Aoshi and was indeed next in line to to be the next leader, he had refused the position and instead recommended Aoshi. Another interesting bit of information that some of you may not be aware of or forgot is that Misao is the granddaughter of the okashira before Aoshi. In any case.........aside from that somewhat minor mistake, you did a great job. b(^_^)


My thanks for the clarification as well.

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Posted 4/28/08

kohakumaru15 wrote:

its really good okina-san i like it


Thank you for the encouraging words...*bows*

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Posted 5/1/08
This is lovely and such a beautiful work it was awesome Gramps! u should write more when u have time it was a good fictional story with a good point of view!
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