Balance
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23 / F / South Korea
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Posted 5/28/08
KyuHyun was in the car with ShinDong, EunHyuk, and EeTeuk coming back from Sukira Kiss the Radio. It was a radio show that EeTeuk and EunHyuk DJed every night. Everyone was tired after their day of working. Of course they would be it was around 12:00midnight. Everyone was on the verge of sleeping. KyuHyun closed his eyes and laid his head on ShinDong’s lap so that it would be a comfortable pillow for him.

Everything happened in a flash of light. KyuHyun found himself seeing absolutely nothing, yet he felt himself being shaken and thrown around. He didn’t feel anything but he heard screeches from the cars as well as screaming.

Finally when the moving stopped he couldn’t feel anything. He felt himself fall with his back flat on something hard even though he couldn’t feel the pain he could tell that it was concrete. He felt something press in deeper into his lung with every breath he took. He couldn’t open his eyes. His mind was coming in and out as he was trying to register what had happened.

He laid there for awhile. He didn’t know how long or how much time had passed but it seemed almost forever. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t speak, and he could hardly even breathe.

“What to do?!” he heard ShinDong saying over and over again. He could tell by the sound of ShinDong’s voice that he was crying heavily. “HyukJae-ah, are you okay?” He heard ShinDong say after a while.

“KyuHyun-ah!” He heard EunHyuk cry out in agony. His voice sounded heavy and deep with urgency.
"KyuHyun-ah!" he heard EeTeuk whispering softly in a raspy voice. By the sound EeTeuk's voice he was hurting really badly and could hardly even talk.

"Jungsu hyung! Are you alright?" He heard ShinDong say after he heard EeTeuk open his mouth to talk. He heard different voices yelling and screaming. The voices seemed to be getting farther and farther away until he couldn’t hear them any more.

KyuHyun couldn’t register what was going on. His mind was blanking out, “What’s going on?” he wanted to ask but his voice wouldn’t come out.

KyuHyun felt himself being lifted and placed in another van. He faintly heard mumbles coming from people over him and beside him. He couldn’t make out what they said. This time the relapses were getting longer and longer. He felt himself become enveloped in darkness.
Just a second ago they were on their way home but what was happening now? All KyuHyun wanted was to go home. All he wanted was to sleep in his warm bed at home with the rest of the members whom he loved so much.

His mind blanked out completely.
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KyuHyun jerked awake as he sat up with a jeering pain at his side. He didn’t sit up for too long because it hurt too much. He lay in bed for awhile trying to get his eyes adjusted to the dark.

‘Where am I?’ he asked himself. When he looked around with his eyes already adjusted to the dark. ‘Oh that’s right, I’m at a hospital.’

Sighing KyuHyun closed his eyes and moved his hand so that it would run though his hair.

It had already been about a month since that accident but KyuHyun still had nightmares about it.

He was in a car accident. He was near death. Being near death KyuHyun thought of the possibilities of what might have happened to him if he was hurt more than he really was.

KyuHyun was told that he had bruises on his lungs, serious injuries in his rib cage and his pelvis. When KyuHyun became aware of the news he worried if he would still be able to sing the way he used to. Other than being with the members; the he thing that he loved most in the world was singing. It was his specialty.

When KyuHyun heard the news that his singing wouldn’t be affected he nearly cried out in happiness. It was his dream to sing. He loved it. To KyuHyun singing was just as important as breathing or eating.

KyuHyun was so glad that he wasn’t hurt more than he was already. If anything more had happened to him he would have most likely lost his chance at doing what he loved most.

KyuHyun glanced at the clock. Some of the members will be here soon to watch over him and talk to him. KyuHyun missed being with the members, he felt so empty just watching them on TV because he felt like he should be there with them.

Suddenly he was hit with an idea. One that he thought of for a long time. He decided to try it out because he needed to see if it worked.

Slowly KyuHyun lifted himself into a sitting position on the bed. He did it slowly so that he would feel as little pain as possible. Once he sat up he pushed the railing on the bed down.

Lately he had been taking lessons so that he could start walking normally again but it was always with someone holding him. He wanted to try standing still on his own. Walking was a bit too much but maybe, just maybe, he could stand still on his own.

He brought his foot toward the ground and shifted his weight on it so that he could bring his other foot down. KyuHyun gripped the edge of the bed so he wouldn’t lose his balance.

The door to the hospital room opened and all the members burst inside the room talking loudly. They all fell silent as they witnessed what KyuHyun was doing.

KyuHyun didn’t pay any attention to the members as they came in. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other to give himself a sense steadiness. Slowly he let one hand go.
Every member held their breath as they saw a miracle happening. They never thought that KyuHyun would attempt standing by himself this soon.

Slowly KyuHyun started to shake from the strain as he pulled his other hand off the bed he stood there without anything or anyone supporting him for about 5 seconds.
By the end of the fifth second he felt his knees give away underneath his weight. He heard and felt the commotion of the members as they caught him and helped him get back into bed.

The members crowded around the bed and made a large commotion. Each member was saying something different. They were either scolding KyuHyun for doing what he did, or they were amazed at what he did. KyuHyun couldn’t hear any of them he was too busy smiling at himself.

He had gotten his balance back. Well, for 5 seconds.
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