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Only Child or Lonely Child?
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27 / M / The City of Fines...
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Posted 7/15/08 , edited 7/15/08
Hi guys.....

As the topic header says, how many you guys are the single child in the family? I really want to know, I too am a single child and growing up is kinda hard for me. I have mixed emotions about it actually. However i feel abit lacking without a brother.

Lets look at some facts and statistics, as I live in Singapore, let just use Singapore(sg) as a case study. Single childs are a growing group of people not only in sg but around the world. Here in sg,182,556 out of 1,015,493 of the population who are married, have only one child. That is,18-20% of the babies born each year will be without siblings in a country with a total population of 4.568m. As compared to America,"the US Census Bureau reports that in 1976, only nine percent of women had just one child. By 2002, that number had nearly doubled to 17.4 percent" and 6 years later it is still growing. Its becoming a growing phenomenon, more and more people are living and will be living without siblings. It is also often stereotyped in sg that single childs are often spoiled and doted upon. Having been the focus of attention from the family throughout their growing-up years, these children are more dependent on others and easily hurt psychologically.

In Alfred Adler's (1870-1937) theory,"he argued that birth order leaves an indelible impression on an individual's style of life - that is, the individual's habitual way of dealing with the tasks of friendship, love, and work. Adler believed that because only children have no rivals for their parents' affection, they may be pampered and spoiled by their parents, particularly the mother. He suggested that this could later cause interpersonal difficulties if the person is not universally liked and admired." However, base on my understanding single childs may face pressures from their families, shouldering the weight and responsiblity of being the only in the family. I being a single child as well often finding the need to excel in my work or studies to meet my parents expectations. Being the only focus of the family it becomes difficult to fail.

Do you agree that single childs are spoiled childs?
If you are(or already are) a single child would(are) you be happy? Given a chance would you prefer siblings?
Do you agree that single child will have better relationship with their parents than siblings?
Being a single child, how do you feel about your parent’s decision?
As a single child, how do you feel about others with siblings?

And last question... When you get married in future, would you want to have one child or more?



So.......... i would really appreciate if you state your thoughs and views here.And if you are a single child, i really want to know about you, rmb to add me! haha
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24 / M / Australia
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Posted 7/15/08
glad i have a brother and sister.
Posted 7/15/08 , edited 7/15/08
Im an only child. I dont live in singapore though I think my parents like to spoil me but I wouldnt say that I am really spoilt. When I was younger I used to always want siblings. As I've gotten older it doesnt bother me as much as it used it to. I like doing things by myself and as an only child you sort of find ways to entertain yourself and everything. My parents and I have a strong relationship, we are all close. However they dont exactly know everything about me but we have a good relationship. My parents didnt really give too much thought into how many children they wanted. They are busy career type people. I dont really envy others with siblings or anything. Like everything there are positives and negatives to either having or not having siblings. The only negative I can really see is if anything happened to my parents and I was left alone. Im old enough to take care of myself but I wouldnt have any immediate family, only my aunts and uncles and cousins and that. I would like to get married in the future and have a family. If I have children I would probably have one or two. I dont want a large family, I would like a smaller family. Overall I do enjoy being an only child. Guess my introverted personality has something to do with it. It would annoy me if I had to constantly look at for a younger sibling or something like that. But I know lots of people who are only children. Personally I like it.
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Posted 7/15/08 , edited 7/15/08
I'm only child, it doesn't bothers me actaully =0

Not having to share my parent's attention with someone is the best for me x3.


(ow, -is not from Singapore btw-)
Ghost
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27 / Norway
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Posted 7/15/08
I got 3 half-brothers and 2 half-sisters, but I don't live with any of them =p

So in one aspect, you could say that I am a only child <_<

Doesn't bother me that much, I enjoy being alone.
Posted 7/15/08
No, i'm not the only child. But having siblings can be a little annoying. There is always a positive and negative side of things. ._.
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27 / M / The City of Fines...
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Posted 7/15/08
lol thx guys, i hope see more ppl here
xyie 
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29 / F / I'm in my happy p...
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Posted 7/15/08
I'm an only child, there are some times when I actually wish I have an older brother or a younger sister because I felt like I'm missing out on a lot of things. I already gave up that I would ever have a sibling, and as of now I'm happy because I have younger cousins whom I treat as brothers/sisters.
Posted 7/15/08
I have a brother and sister, but i don't actually live with them, so yeah i guess i am an only child in one way, I don't feel lonely, but it is true that you get spoiled, I pretty much ask for anything of my dad and i get it.
when I do get married in the future, I would not have one child, as I am so aware of people who are only children and are totally spoiled and are incapable to share.
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27 / M / The City of Fines...
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Posted 7/15/08
you have to look at it from another angle sometimes
Posted 7/15/08
29 Brother's
16 sister's.
We all have to share a bag of cashews for dinner.
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29 / M / SINGAPORE
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Posted 7/15/08 , edited 7/15/08
I have an older brother and i love him for who he is. Even tho he alwasy ask me to do stuff for him and at times i hate it, but i never hate him nor can i even say that i hate him to anyone or to myself.

its like having a SUPER BEST FREN. having a sibling is nice and i believe the perfect setup would be 2 brothers and 1 sister.

if something were to happen to my brother, i would cry alot.
if he needs a kidney, i will give him one of mine.
if he needs a new heart, i will buy it or rob it by force.
i will kill some1 to keep him alive.
if i saw some1 hitting my bro, i will kill that person. i will break all his joints 1st b4 i gouge his eyes out.

lol alittle hardcore huh?
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77 / F / Under a bridge, h...
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Posted 7/15/08
Im a single child
well technically im not but its just that my father dosent want me to met my other step brothers (3) and my step sister.
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27 / M / The City of Fines...
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Posted 7/15/08

Razen wrote:

I have an older brother and i love him for who he is. Even tho he alwasy ask me to do stuff for him and at times i hate it, but i never hate him nor can i even say that i hate him to anyone or to myself.

its like having a SUPER BEST FREN. having a sibling is nice and i believe the perfect setup would be 2 brothers and 1 sister.

if something were to happen to my brother, i would cry alot.
if he needs a kidney, i will give him one of mine.
if he needs a new heart, i will buy it or rob it by force.
i will kill some1 to keep him alive.
if i saw some1 hitting my bro, i will kill that person. i will break all his joints 1st b4 i gouge his eyes out.

lol alittle hardcore huh?


Wow... i would love to have a brother like you. haha
Posted 7/15/08
im an only child.. and it sucks btw...
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