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is it justified for a social outcast to pay a prostitute to lose their virginity
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28 / M / over the hills an...
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Posted 7/31/08
this has been bugging me for a while, there was someone i knew at secondary school called mark, he was a total social outcast and didnt have many friends and wasnt popular with girls either

around year 8 he told his friend that he payed a soho hooker to lose his virginity (since everyone in the whole school did it by then and he was the only one under the sun that didnt get any) and in a matter of hours this spread all over the school and he was further made fun of (i made fun of him too ... yeah i know i shouldnt have but i was young)

anyway im not sure what it would have felt like (since the girls were nice to anyone who wasnt a total freak) but i did see girls making fun of him and stuff, saying shit like "you're gonna die a virgin, no girl in her right mind would bang you" and all that shit

my question is do you think its right to sell out your virginity to a £20 whore if you're pushed against a corner and think you might possible die a virgin ... i have mine .. but i want your opinions
Posted 7/31/08
I think it's something disappointing when you look back on it.

Say this Mark guy finds a mate. How depressing will it be when he looks back and realizes that his first time was with a hooker?

I'm not a guy, so maybe I'm not fully grasping the concept, but this is just how I see it.
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Posted 7/31/08
I think it's wrong.

First off, he didn't sell it. He paid someone to take it, which reaks of utter desperation, and don't think girls won't sense that or hear about it. He'll be forever labeled as a guy that had to pay for it.

And why did he take such drastic measures? Was it simply the urge? That would be somewhat understandable. But if the guy did it just to look cool in the eyes of his friends, or to simply not be a virgin anymore, I'd say he's all mixed up, and needs to get his priorities in life straight.

There's worse fates than dying a virgin. Like living a long life, dominated by the consequences of bad decison making.
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Posted 7/31/08
Is it really that bad to stay a virgin?

I mean I see that pretty much everyone in my school has done it, but their relationships are all screwed up because of that poor choice to have premarital sex. And I find it to be a little bit more sad that he was so caved under pressure that he went and did it with a hooker. Because I believe that sex brings so much more intimacy, that's why its so much better to wait until you're married.
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Posted 7/31/08

kuro_bara wrote:

Is it really that bad to stay a virgin?

I mean I see that pretty much everyone in my school has done it, but their relationships are all screwed up because of that poor choice to have premarital sex. And I find it to be a little bit more sad that he was so caved under pressure that he went and did it with a hooker. Because I believe that sex brings so much more intimacy, that's why its so much better to wait until you're married.


Absolutely awesome response.
Posted 7/31/08

kuro_bara wrote:

Is it really that bad to stay a virgin?

I mean I see that pretty much everyone in my school has done it, but their relationships are all screwed up because of that poor choice to have premarital sex.


Right. I mean, I see so many girls that regret their first time because it was with a guy who dumped them the day AFTER. this is why people should wait it out.

I feel bad because I used to think differently.



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28 / M / over the hills an...
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Posted 7/31/08

kuro_bara wrote:

Is it really that bad to stay a virgin?

I mean I see that pretty much everyone in my school has done it, but their relationships are all screwed up because of that poor choice to have premarital sex. And I find it to be a little bit more sad that he was so caved under pressure that he went and did it with a hooker. Because I believe that sex brings so much more intimacy, that's why its so much better to wait until you're married.



girls no ... girls get praise for staying a virgin ... guys get bullied and cussed out for being a virgin
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Posted 7/31/08
I agree with Flourescent...there are some people who dont feel that being a virgin is a big deal and there are others who want to get rid of it fast as if its a nuisance , I guess it depends on how a person feels about it. If he/she sees nothing wrong with selling out his/her virginity to a prostitute than maybe he/she wouldnt be haunted by that experience. But honestly, sex shouldnt be main focus of anyone's life,I wouldnt lose my v-card just for the sake of getting rid of it. So to your question, no I dont think its right..I know for me, almost every couple (and plenty individuals) in my grade 12 graduating class has done it, and perhaps my boyfriend and me are the only ones who are still virgins but meh, no pressure at all to lose it
...its just kinda sad how the guy felt pressured to get rid of his virginity, unfortunately this type of peer pressure happens everything *sigh*
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Posted 7/31/08

SummerKiss wrote:

I agree with Flourescent...there are some people who dont feel that being a virgin is a big deal and there are others who want to get rid of it fast as if its a nuisance , I guess it depends on how a person feels about it. If he/she sees nothing wrong with selling out his/her virginity to a prostitute than maybe he/she wouldnt be haunted by that experience. But honestly, sex shouldnt be main focus of anyone's life,I wouldnt lose my v-card just for the sake of getting rid of it. So to your question, no I dont think its right..I know for me, almost every couple (and plenty individuals) in my grade 12 graduating class has done it, and perhaps my boyfriend and me are the only ones who are still virgins but meh, no pressure at all to lose it
...its just kinda sad how the guy felt pressured to get rid of his virginity, unfortunately this type of peer pressure happens everything *sigh*



maybe lol ... we were 13 at the time ... but still it was around catford (one of the hardest places in london) ... you could get bullied and shat on for the smallest things there

i remember if you didnt lose your virginity by 15 there you were ripped on everyday and no girl would bang you ... you'd be considered a wasteman or broken bird ... a bird that cant chirpse (erm ... english slang lol)
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Posted 7/31/08

J1nn wrote:


kuro_bara wrote:

Is it really that bad to stay a virgin?

I mean I see that pretty much everyone in my school has done it, but their relationships are all screwed up because of that poor choice to have premarital sex. And I find it to be a little bit more sad that he was so caved under pressure that he went and did it with a hooker. Because I believe that sex brings so much more intimacy, that's why its so much better to wait until you're married.



girls no ... girls get praise for staying a virgin ... guys get bullied and cussed out for being a virgin


Bullied and cussed, huh?

I guess that's all just part of peer pressure really. Despite what others may say to frown your choice of staying pure, just don't give in. But then again, you'll be bullied no matter what. Whether or not you're a virgin you'll be taking heat from both sides I guess.

Like you said, guys get bullied and cussed. So I'm guessing they call you insults like being a "pussy" or whatever. But for being impure you are labeled by others as the "total manwhore" >_>
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Posted 7/31/08

J1nn wrote:


kuro_bara wrote:

Is it really that bad to stay a virgin?

I mean I see that pretty much everyone in my school has done it, but their relationships are all screwed up because of that poor choice to have premarital sex. And I find it to be a little bit more sad that he was so caved under pressure that he went and did it with a hooker. Because I believe that sex brings so much more intimacy, that's why its so much better to wait until you're married.



girls no ... girls get praise for staying a virgin ... guys get bullied and cussed out for being a virgin


True. All the more reason to stand tall and stay strong. I have friends my age that have kids, STD's and the like. Do they seriously think they can look down on me because I'm not trying to hook up? Only if they're ignorant to their own plight.
Posted 7/31/08 , edited 7/31/08

J1nn wrote:


SummerKiss wrote:

I agree with Flourescent...there are some people who dont feel that being a virgin is a big deal and there are others who want to get rid of it fast as if its a nuisance , I guess it depends on how a person feels about it. If he/she sees nothing wrong with selling out his/her virginity to a prostitute than maybe he/she wouldnt be haunted by that experience. But honestly, sex shouldnt be main focus of anyone's life,I wouldnt lose my v-card just for the sake of getting rid of it. So to your question, no I dont think its right..I know for me, almost every couple (and plenty individuals) in my grade 12 graduating class has done it, and perhaps my boyfriend and me are the only ones who are still virgins but meh, no pressure at all to lose it
...its just kinda sad how the guy felt pressured to get rid of his virginity, unfortunately this type of peer pressure happens everything *sigh*



maybe lol ... we were 13 at the time ... but still it was around catford (one of the hardest places in london) ... you could get bullied and shat on for the smallest things there

i remember if you didnt lose your virginity by 15 there you were ripped on everyday and no girl would bang you ... you'd be considered a wasteman or broken bird ... a bird that cant chirpse (erm ... english slang lol)


For that matter, is it really right to be so down on the guy? I mean sure he succumbed to peer pressure which is obviously wrong, but who are the people that put the pressure on him in the first place? Some people go around making sex seem like it's such a great thing. I notice how that stops when their "lover" breaks it off and it starts again when they go out with new people but not everyone does notice it. Apparently this Mark guy didn't.
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Posted 7/31/08

J1nn wrote:


SummerKiss wrote:

I agree with Flourescent...there are some people who dont feel that being a virgin is a big deal and there are others who want to get rid of it fast as if its a nuisance , I guess it depends on how a person feels about it. If he/she sees nothing wrong with selling out his/her virginity to a prostitute than maybe he/she wouldnt be haunted by that experience. But honestly, sex shouldnt be main focus of anyone's life,I wouldnt lose my v-card just for the sake of getting rid of it. So to your question, no I dont think its right..I know for me, almost every couple (and plenty individuals) in my grade 12 graduating class has done it, and perhaps my boyfriend and me are the only ones who are still virgins but meh, no pressure at all to lose it
...its just kinda sad how the guy felt pressured to get rid of his virginity, unfortunately this type of peer pressure happens everything *sigh*



maybe lol ... we were 13 at the time ... but still it was around catford (one of the hardest places in london) ... you could get bullied and shat on for the smallest things there

i remember if you didnt lose your virginity by 15 there you were ripped on everyday and no girl would bang you ... you'd be considered a wasteman or broken bird ... a bird that cant chirpse (erm ... english slang lol)


Oh wow thats so messed up (LOL i live in Canada and people use the term "wasteman" all the time haha), hmm now that you've given more detail as to how bad the bullying was, I can understand how the kid must have felt..thats sad. But 13? isnt that a bit too young, wow. Usually people I know have their first times at age 16-17...
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Posted 7/31/08
To each his/her own.
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26 / F / Right behind you!
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Posted 7/31/08
I find that pretty freaking pathetic. Why are people do desparate to lose their virginity as soon as possible? I refuse to lose my virginity to a random shmuck and regret it and most likely end up getting a STD or STI.

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