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│RANDOM│Jowk Jowk Jowk (Jokes)
Citizen
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25 / F / at center of the...
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Posted 12/14/07 , edited 4/13/08
1 lasing nasalubong ang matabang babae na may kasamang aso

Lasing: hoy, saan mo nakuha yang baboy?
Babae: aso ito hindi baboy!
Lasing: huwag ka nga sumabat! yung aso ang kausap ko!

delayed si tekla

Pag dating ni Lando sa bahay, sabi ni Tekya, ang asawa niya, "Sweetheart, delayed ako ng isang buwan. Kagagaling ko lang sa doktor. Pero huwag mong sabihin kahit kanino, baka mapahiya lang ako kapag di nagkatotoo"

Kinaumagahan, merong dumating na taga-Meralco. Pagbukas ng pinto, sabi ng collector, "Ale, delayed ho kayo ng isang buwan." "Kanino mo nalaman ito?" tanong ni Tekya. "Nandito ho nakasulat sa records namin," sagot ng taga-Meralco. "Talaga? Nakasulat sa records ninyo?"

Sa sumunod na araw, si Lando ay sumugod sa Meralco at galit na galit pagdating sa counter:
"Paano niyo nalaman na delayed ng isang buwan ang misis ko? "Konting pasensya lang. Kung gusto niyong mawala sa records namin ito, magbayad na lang kayo," sagot ng isang empleyado.


"Eh, kung ayaw kong magbayad?" tanong ni Lando.

"Puputulan ho kayo," sagot ng empleyado.

"Kung puputulan ako, anong gagamitin ng misis ko?"

"Pwede naman siyang gumamit ng kandila di ba?"
Citizen
1659 cr points
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24 / F / middle of nowhere..
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Posted 12/15/07 , edited 4/13/08
LOL ! cge na lang ako tawa! help!
Citizen
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29 / F / Austin, TX United...
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Posted 12/15/07 , edited 4/13/08
lol i'm not sure if anyone posted this but here's one i heard yesterday..

KNOCK KNOCK!
who's there?
Ako ma ba..
Ako ma ba who?

HAHA YOU STANK!
Citizen
1462 cr points
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28 / M / Cordova, cebu, Ph...
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Posted 12/16/07 , edited 4/13/08
Inside a call center in cebu:

trouble shooting with a customer..

agent: Sir, I need you to turn off your computer and modem.

*After a few minutes*

Customer: Okay, it’s already off.

Agent: Okay, now I need you to click next to continue.

Customer: DO WHAT!?!?!?

courtesy of himan from himantayon.com
Citizen
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29 / F / Austin, TX United...
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Posted 12/16/07 , edited 4/13/08

rasinggan wrote:

Inside a call center in cebu:

trouble shooting with a customer..

agent: Sir, I need you to turn off your computer and modem.

*After a few minutes*

Customer: Okay, it’s already off.

Agent: Okay, now I need you to click next to continue.

Customer: DO WHAT!?!?!?

courtesy of himan from himantayon.com


i don't get it?
Citizen
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26 / F / Nine and Quarters...
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Posted 12/17/07 , edited 4/13/08

jaderoselle wrote:

Tanong: anong first name ni PIKACHU?

Sagot: eh di CHERRY PIE!



Ahaha naloka ako dito. Haha
Citizen
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26 / F / Nine and Quarters...
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Posted 12/17/07 , edited 4/13/08

darknumb1204 wrote:

Corny Joke #6

Do you know INNER ROW?
What is INNER ROW?

Inner Row is that which comes before pibrerow, Marsow, Abril, Mayow....



Check it out yow! :D

Citizen
1462 cr points
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28 / M / Cordova, cebu, Ph...
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Posted 12/17/07 , edited 4/13/08

jenling911 wrote:


rasinggan wrote:

Inside a call center in cebu:

trouble shooting with a customer..

agent: Sir, I need you to turn off your computer and modem.

*After a few minutes*

Customer: Okay, it’s already off.

Agent: Okay, now I need you to click next to continue.

Customer: DO WHAT!?!?!?

courtesy of himan from himantayon.com


i don't get it?


hayz anu ba yan. try to understand. but if u still don't get it. i'll explain for you. naka off nga ung computer ng customer, eh d panu nya i click ang continue?

saonz..
Citizen
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29 / F / Austin, TX United...
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Posted 12/17/07 , edited 4/13/08

rasinggan wrote:


jenling911 wrote:


rasinggan wrote:

Inside a call center in cebu:

trouble shooting with a customer..

agent: Sir, I need you to turn off your computer and modem.

*After a few minutes*

Customer: Okay, it’s already off.

Agent: Okay, now I need you to click next to continue.

Customer: DO WHAT!?!?!?

courtesy of himan from himantayon.com


i don't get it?


hayz anu ba yan. try to understand. but if u still don't get it. i'll explain for you. naka off nga ung computer ng customer, eh d panu nya i click ang continue?

saonz..


but i thought he was on the phone? so why should he be clickin on anything in the first place?
Holy God Emperor
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76 / Unreachable Dream...
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Posted 12/18/07 , edited 4/13/08

rasinggan wrote:

Inside a call center in cebu:

trouble shooting with a customer..

agent: Sir, I need you to turn off your computer and modem.

*After a few minutes*

Customer: Okay, it’s already off.

Agent: Okay, now I need you to click next to continue.

Customer: DO WHAT!?!?!?

courtesy of himan from himantayon.com


Hahah, thats really funny...lolz
Citizen
1462 cr points
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28 / M / Cordova, cebu, Ph...
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Posted 12/18/07 , edited 4/13/08
wow sikat ata nang joke ko ah. hehehehe. lolz merry christmas sa inyu!
Citizen
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29 / F / Austin, TX United...
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Posted 12/18/07 , edited 4/13/08
laaaaame haha i guess
Citizen
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24 / M / if i told you wou...
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Posted 12/18/07 , edited 4/13/08
erap jowks

may tatlong tao cory. gloria, erap
ano pagkakaiba nila?
Cory = cant tell a lie
Gloria = cant tell the truth
Erap = cant tell the difference

Erap teaching his granchild an action song "put your right feet on, put your left feet out." Loi heard him and said "Dad, its foot."
Erap: "Sorry, okay foot your right feet in, foot your left feet out."

Favorite filipinos
cory = ninoy aquino
eddie = andres boniacio
erap = casino filipino

cory = Pile it high, sell it cheap
fidel = Either lead, follow or get out of the way
erap = Happy hour, 50 percent off

zamora = Sir, puwede bang palitan 'tong laptop ko?
Erap = Bakit?
zamora = Masyadong mabigat, eh!
Erap = Ba't di ka mag-delete ng files para gumaan?

Why did Erap shoot his wife when he bought a house? Because the contract read: "Execute all 3 copies together with your wife..."

anak = paap erap may drug test ako bukas baka mahuli ako!
erap = sus yun lang ba? edi wag ka mangopya

anak = tay manganganak na asawa ko
erap = dali tawagan mo mcdo
anak = bakit naman?
erap = limited promo dun e...may free delivery kasi

sa sobrang talino ni erap kaya niya magbilang ng infinity anim na beses

la lang jowks:

bakit maraming windows ang tindahan?
para maBintanA

bakit walang pera ang bulag?
kasi walng Kita

bakit mataas ang grade ng mga basketbolista?
kasi magaling sila mangbola

i c... sori d po me nagbasa
Citizen
1186 cr points
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28 / M / Cebu
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Posted 12/18/07 , edited 4/13/08
"do not do unto others what you do not want others to do to you"

"wag kang ganyan, kung maggaganyan ka, wag ganun"

Citizen
4726 cr points
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28 / M / Philippines
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Posted 12/18/07 , edited 4/13/08



may bisayang katulong sa mansyon
Amo: hey if the guy comes tell him im having second thoughts
yaya: yes boss
duamting yung tao
Tao: where is your boss?
yaya: nasa kwarto pare nagsisi-kontot
(hah sagwa talaga magsalita ang mga bisaya)


wag namang murahin mga bisaya!
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