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High school confidential: 27 percent of teen girls and 10 percent of teen boys pressured into unwanted sex
Posted 9/10/08 , edited 9/11/08
High school confidential: 27 percent of teen girls and 10 percent of teen boys pressured into unwanted sex

Teens today look so cool and confident that you'd never guess that setting sexual boundaries would be a problem for them. Besides wasn't the freedom to say no to sex as much a part of the sexual revolution as the freedom to say yes?

It appears some people have forgotten what sexual gains were made during the sexual revolution of the 1960s (think The Summer of Love) or that they've failed to teach their kids about how sexual freedoms were redefined during that time. A study published earlier this year by the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) indicates that teens (both males and females) find it difficult to set sexual boundaries. And other studies have indicated that this generation of young women is more sexually submissive than the generation that came before. (A 2002 study published in the journal Perspectives on Sexual and Reproductive Health found that 20 percent of girls and young women (ages 14 to 26) don't feel that they have any right to "make their own decisions about contraception, regardless of their partner's wishes; to tell their partner that they do not want to have intercourse without birth control, that they want to make love differently or that their partner is being too rough; and to stop foreplay at any time, including at the point of intercourse.")

For now, I'm going to focus on the CAMH study, both because it is the newer study and it points out that lack of sexual assertiveness is an issue for both boys and girls.

CAMH's Centre for Prevention Science surveyed 1819 Grade 9 and 11 students in southwestern Ontario schools (both rural and urban) between 2004 and 2007.

The researchers found that

* 10 percent of males and 27 percent of females admitted being pressured into unwanted sexual activity. For example, they found that 15 percent of girls reported having oral sex as a means of avoiding intercourse.

The study also revealed that 4 percent of males in Grade 11 had admitted trying to force someone to have sex with them; and that students of both genders are subjected to significant amounts of sexual harassment at school. The researchers found that

* girls were much more likely to report having received sexual comments, unwanted looks or touches, and having parts of their body commented on or rated.
* boys were much more likely to report being called homophobic insults (such as "gay" or "fag") than girls (e.g., "lezzie," "dyke") and that this pattern of homophobic insults continued to be a problem from year to year for boys (the incident rate was 34 percent in grade 9 and 30 percent in grade 11). Homophobic insults declined significantly for girls between grade 9 and grade 11 (from 22 percent to 12 percent).

So what does this mean to us as parents? It's important to talk to our kids about healthy relationships (setting sexual boundaries for ourselves and treating our partners with respect); that we model anti-bullying behaviors within the family; and that we teach our kids (and make them feel) that they are worthy of respect.

We also need to find out what our kids are being taught at school about these issues at both the elementary and secondary school level (CAMH researcher David Wolfe, PhD, who headed up the study of Grade 9 to 11 students, has found that many of these unhealthy relationship patterns are already in place by the time kids start high school) and, more importantly, to insist that schools walk the talk when it comes to promoting healthy relationships within the school community.

You can't expect kids to buy into messages about treating other people with respect if the kids in that classroom don't feel respected by their teachers or their classmates.

The mantra of this generation of kids is, after all, "Show me why this matters and why I should care or don't bother teaching me this at all."

That's their challenge to us -- their parents and teachers -- as we head into another school year. My question for you is this: are we up for it?


sorry its not written by me.. i just copied it down
im too lazy to explain it ;p

so my opinion is guys and girls should have an appropriate education
now a days and they should be respected by adults and their classmates n whatever u call it..
so ur opinion? make it appropriate..

Posted 9/10/08 , edited 9/10/08
http://ca.lifestyle.yahoo.com/family-relationships/blog/anndouglas/761/high-school-confidential-27-percent-of-teen-girls-and-10-percent-of-teen-boys-pressured-into-unwanted-sex

Ha, thought that I read that somewhere. Maybe you should post the source next time, or at least mention that this was not written by you.

Other than that, I don't think that ALL kids should be thrown into the same helpless case, actually I think that the kids of nowadays are pretty much self-confident, it's just that the moral value of sex in general got lost during these years, for example there are barely any commercials with no sexual content or any similar content left and there aren't any boundaries coming from sexual activity any more as there are several ways of how to prevent pregnancy, and that makes most teenies light-headed about the idea of having a little sex here and there.
I think that sex has not the value as it used to have, it's just a simple thing of how to enjoy oneself, disregarding the consequences, people are strongly influenced by films, commercials, serials, where the importance lies within the sexiness of the actor, person. They basically scream for more flesh, skin. Comparing my generation, of when I was around 13, and the 13 year olds of today, then there are HUGE differences, also the access to the cyber world has changed the dimensions of inappropriate behaviour, content, media, etc. The main reason why it is the way it is, is because there is just too much sex, sex here sex there, it's like a disease...I don't mean to say that there is something wrong with being aware of ones sexuality, but I think that some things are just overplayed without considering the consequences.

Look at the clothing of the girls? If I was a guy, I'd tap and sexually harassed each one of them. They walk around like cheap wh*res, but get all b*tchy when someone actually touches them. It's a provocation. Not that I care about what they wear, but I think if one is already wearing such tight clothing then they should also get along with the idea that someone might want to grab that butt here and there.

It is true, as well, that the word fag, gay, etc. are being regularly used to hurt the male's pride. But just in case, this words are overplayed, too, and I wouldn't pay any attention to them any more.

When it comes to sex. I don't think that it is a must to lose your virginity with 13-14. That's nonsense. Take your time, and if someone mocks you because you are still a virgin with 16, then tell them that you at least value your body and don't want to give your precious moments just to anyone from the streets or a party.

Sexual activity has probably grown, as girls and boys now feel securer when it comes to prevent pregnancy, which was not that reliable 50 years ago.

Enough said.

Floetry~


Posted 9/11/08

I-Killerbee-I wrote:

http://ca.lifestyle.yahoo.com/family-relationships/blog/anndouglas/761/high-school-confidential-27-percent-of-teen-girls-and-10-percent-of-teen-boys-pressured-into-unwanted-sex

Ha, thought that I read that somewhere. Maybe you should post the source next time, or at least mention that this was not written by you.

Other than that, I don't think that ALL kids should be thrown into the same helpless case, actually I think that the kids of nowadays are pretty much self-confident, it's just that the moral value of sex in general got lost during these years, for example there are barely any commercials with no sexual content or any similar content left and there aren't any boundaries coming from sexual activity any more as there are several ways of how to prevent pregnancy, and that makes most teenies light-headed about the idea of having a little sex here and there.
I think that sex has not the value as it used to have, it's just a simple thing of how to enjoy oneself, disregarding the consequences, people are strongly influenced by films, commercials, serials, where the importance lies within the sexiness of the actor, person. They basically scream for more flesh, skin. Comparing my generation, of when I was around 13, and the 13 year olds of today, then there are HUGE differences, also the access to the cyber world has changed the dimensions of inappropriate behaviour, content, media, etc. The main reason why it is the way it is, is because there is just too much sex, sex here sex there, it's like a disease...I don't mean to say that there is something wrong with being aware of ones sexuality, but I think that some things are just overplayed without considering the consequences.
Look at the clothing of the girls? If I was a guy, I'd tap and sexually harassed each one of them. They walk around like cheap wh*res, but get all b*tchy when someone actually touches them. It's a provocation. Not that I care about what they wear, but I think if one is already wearing such tight clothing then they should also get along with the idea that someone might want to grab that butt here and there.

It is true, as well, that the word fag, gay, etc. are being regularly used to hurt the male's pride. But just in case, this words are overplayed, too, and I wouldn't pay any attention to them any more.

When it comes to sex. I don't think that it is a must to lose your virginity with 13-14. That's nonsense. Take your time, and if someone mocks you because you are still a virgin with 16, then tell them that you at least value your body and don't want to give your precious moments just to anyone from the streets or a party.

Sexual activity has probably grown, as girls and boys now feel securer when it comes to prevent pregnancy, which was not that reliable 50 years ago.

Enough said.

Floetry~




thats true. its bcz of the media that got them influence
by having sex is just 4 fun. also the media n music..
now a days is about sex, money and girls..

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Posted 9/11/08
that's true .

gladly I study at home so it doesn't happened to me


Posted 9/11/08
wtf...what kind of boys don't want sex? >_>
im pretty sure they are gay
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Posted 9/12/08

rockangel7589 wrote:

thats true. its bcz of the media that got them influence
by having sex is just 4 fun. also the media n music..
now a days is about sex, money and girls..


Correlation is not causation. Now, I don't disagree that media influence people, but let's not forget that people influence the media as well. It gives them what they demand, which, at the basic level, is what humans have wanted since they came into existence.

The media get a bad reputation because they make it so obvious, but let's be careful not to put all of the blame on some external source when we're all responsible as well.

As to the original post, I have never heard a good argument against sex education, so I'm all for it. Boosting confidence, self-esteem, and a notion of autonomy, however, is another matter entirely. If you're really in a situation where you're being pressured by many others to have sex, it is unlikely that having someone who isn't a peer tell you it's all right to not do it will be very effective. Focus on cultivating peer relationships that affirm your own values if you really believe in them. If you can't accomplish that, be prepared to stand alone against powerful forces. And if you can't manage that, you're out of luck--but at least you can be safe about it if you're educated.
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Posted 10/30/08
it's simply peer pressure. to be in, you have to do what popular people do.

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Posted 10/30/08

KinkyHamster wrote:

wtf...what kind of boys don't want sex? >_>
im pretty sure they are gay


nah nah nah even the gay ones want sex
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Posted 10/30/08

lonely_devil wrote:


KinkyHamster wrote:

wtf...what kind of boys don't want sex? >_>
im pretty sure they are gay


nah nah nah even the gay ones want sex

My theory is that those 10 percent of boys being forced into unwanted sexual activities are straight guys pressured into gay activities...that or fat chicks.
Posted 10/31/08
There was a time i wanted to shag every guy and girl i see.
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Posted 10/31/08

FlavorAmazing wrote:


lonely_devil wrote:


KinkyHamster wrote:

wtf...what kind of boys don't want sex? >_>
im pretty sure they are gay


nah nah nah even the gay ones want sex

My theory is that those 10 percent of boys being forced into unwanted sexual activities are straight guys pressured into gay activities...that or fat chicks.


or they could be like kouta from kanokon.
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Posted 10/31/08
i think that every person have a right to say NO! if the girl said that and the boy just get on pretending to not heard it, hit him in the freaking ba***!
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Posted 11/1/08

DeathDragon550 wrote:


FlavorAmazing wrote:


lonely_devil wrote:


KinkyHamster wrote:

wtf...what kind of boys don't want sex? >_>
im pretty sure they are gay


nah nah nah even the gay ones want sex

My theory is that those 10 percent of boys being forced into unwanted sexual activities are straight guys pressured into gay activities...that or fat chicks.


or they could be like kouta from kanokon.


Oh he wanted it, he was just afraid of having his tiny, effeminate body crushed in some violently deviant act of sexuality.
I'd imagine that if there was a person like Kouta, he'd promptly get stomped to death by his jealous classmates.
Posted 12/16/08
There shouldnt be ANY sex ever at all.
why?
because the human race has to end
why?
because we destroyed it (the animals, the plants, the oceans, the friken atmosphere!)
if there were no more humans, then slowly, the earth will heal itself again. And it will be healthy again to.

And boys are stupid rapists who only want one thing, theres more to life then girls and sex
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Posted 12/16/08

Tohru_Chi03 wrote:

There shouldnt be ANY sex ever at all.
why?
because the human race has to end
why?
because we destroyed it (the animals, the plants, the oceans, the friken atmosphere!)
if there were no more humans, then slowly, the earth will heal itself again. And it will be healthy again to.

And boys are stupid rapists who only want one thing, theres more to life then girls and sex

Thanks, you've made me laugh.


And in the off-chance that you're actually the few that are actually being serious, I have to laugh more.
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