I know we've been together for 3 months and that may not seem much to others, but to us it was a big deal because that was the longest relationship we've ever been in. I didn't hate anything about you; your flaws also make up who you are, which is what I love about you, in fact I love everything about you. What brought our relationship to demise was because you were selfish, I risked everything to be with you and yet you wouldn't risk much to want to be with me. You don't understand how painful it was for me to find out that you said "I love you" to those girls. I know it was dumb of me to overreact because "they're just friends", but it was difficult for me to understand that since saying that sort of things to my friends makes me feel uncomfortable. All I asked for you was to drop your friendship with THOSE girls, they were still strangers to you and yet you wouldn't do that for me, I didn't care if you were friends with other girls, just not THOSE girls; I knew they were wrong for you, yet I couldn't tell you because I'd be some "jealous girlfriend". I told you I had something like that happen to me before yet you wouldn't listen. Why don't you ever listen? You saw how much I cried over that, you saw how much pain I was in because of that, yet you let it pass, you wouldn't put that into consideration.
What happened to US? Why exactly did you change it from "US" to just "me" and just "you"? Why didn't you consider what I've done for you? Why didn't you think about our time together, how I wrote all those love notes for you, how I drew pictures for you, all the compliments I gave you everyday, and especially how I was the only one there for you (although not physically) when you were sick from tonsillitis and that you went for surgery? You were the only person I ever talked to, I lost all contacts with friends because you were my highest priority, you were my best friend whom I told all my secrets to and trust the most. I actually really love you! I actually thought you were attractive when you didn't think so yourself!
It really sucked though, how you thought about our first date after we broke up. It sucked how I cried so much everyday and night over what happened. I still love you though it's just that the only thing is, what brought me to like you before is no longer there. After you broke up with me, I was lost - I didn't even know who I am. I'm still tearing up inside, I'm still lost, I'm afraid to get back up when no matter what I'll be pushed back down.
Remember when I had a panic attack? That's never happened to me before. However coincidentally, every time I thought about losing you, my chest would tighten oh so painfully, causing me to hyperventilate. I was afraid. I was afraid of dying right there. I was afraid of being without you. And now that I am without you, everything just doesn't seem right.
I can't hate you and I can't love you, but I still do.