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Sick Jokes!
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
Why does michael jackson like twenty four year olds

Beacuse there are twenty of them
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
A little boy and a pedophile are walking in the deep, dark, woods. The little boy says,

"Mister, I'm scared! These woods are really creepy."

The pedophile replies, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back all by myself."
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
Some not too smart gangsters decide to rob a bank. After several days of planning they agree on the best plan. The next day they get to work and are able to get into the bank relatively easy thanks to their planning. Once inside the main vault they discover one wall is full of safety deposit boxes and start to work on them immediately. They drill and pry open the first box only to find a small container of vanilla pudding inside.

The Head Gangster says, "Okay, well, at least we can eat it." So they eat the pudding. They drill and pry open up the second safety deposit box and there sits another pudding. They decide to devour it too.

Determined to find the goods, the process continues for the rest of the night until all the safety deposit boxes have been opened. They didn't find any money or jewelry in any of the boxes. Disappointed the head gangster said, "Well, at least they left something for us to eat."

The next day, while listening to the news they hear:"Yesterday the largest SPERM bank in the USA was robbed by an unknown group of people....."
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
A young fellow ran into an old man who was carring a bag.

"What's in the bag?" the youngster asked.

"magic apples", the old man replied.

"Prove it", said the young man.

"Well, besides apples, what is your favorite two fruits?" asked the old man.

"Watermelon and peaches", he answered.

The man handed him an apple and told him to try it out. The boy took a bite and said that it tasted like a watermelon. "Ok, turn it over", he said.

The boy did and took another bite and said that it tasted like a peach.

The youngster still wasn't convinced that they were magic.

The old fellow told him to name something else that he liked to eat.

"I like to eat pussy." he snapped.

The man handed him another apple and told him to try it.

He took a big bite, spit it out, wipped his mouth and esclaimed, "That tasted like shit".

The old man looked at him, smiled and said, "Turn it over."
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
A fireman is at the station house working outside on the fire truck when he notices a little girl next door. The little girl is in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side.

She is wearing a fireman's hat and has the wagon tied to a dog. The fireman says "Hey little girl. What are you doing?" The little girl says "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck!"

The fireman walks over to take a closer look. "Little girl that sure is a nice fire truck!" the fireman says. "Thanks mister", says the little girl. The fireman looks a little closer and notices the little girl has tied the dog to the wagon by it's testicles.

"Little girl", says the fireman, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dog's neck I think you could go faster."

The little girl says, "You're probably right mister, but then I wouldn't have a siren!"
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster. What would you have?
2 ft. of my cock in your ass.
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
what is the difference between acne and a catholic priest?
Acne usually comes on a boys face after he turns 12
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28 / M / Burbank
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Posted 10/19/06
well some of hese jokes werent that sick but they are funny none the less lol and im going to bed now laterz ill leave with this last joke...


If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain, can a hooker get layed off?

Jsu
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31 / M / Succesfully kille...
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Posted 10/19/06

kyocool wrote:

whats the worst part about eating vegatables?
...putting them back in the wheelchair when your done






Trevor (OP)



I didn't get this at first, I was thinking what does vegetables have to do with wheelchairs?. But I realized you were'nt talking about vegetables as in carrots.
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22 / F / tx
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Posted 10/19/06
how about this. Two guy came to school. With nothing on. They ask them were have you been and he said on top of a hill. Then a girl came in and the they told her let me gess on top of a hill she said no i am the hill
logain 
15944 cr points
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Posted 10/19/06

infested wrote:

Some not too smart gangsters decide to rob a bank. After several days of planning they agree on the best plan. The next day they get to work and are able to get into the bank relatively easy thanks to their planning. Once inside the main vault they discover one wall is full of safety deposit boxes and start to work on them immediately. They drill and pry open the first box only to find a small container of vanilla pudding inside.

The Head Gangster says, "Okay, well, at least we can eat it." So they eat the pudding. They drill and pry open up the second safety deposit box and there sits another pudding. They decide to devour it too.

Determined to find the goods, the process continues for the rest of the night until all the safety deposit boxes have been opened. They didn't find any money or jewelry in any of the boxes. Disappointed the head gangster said, "Well, at least they left something for us to eat."

The next day, while listening to the news they hear:"Yesterday the largest SPERM bank in the USA was robbed by an unknown group of people....."



logain 
15944 cr points
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Posted 10/19/06
I cant see my post again
EDIT Crap nver mind forgot to refresh
9121 cr points
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27 / M
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Posted 10/19/06
how many jews can you fit in a car?.....2 in the front, 3 in the back, and 6millon in the ash tray.
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28 / M / alabama, usa ......
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Posted 10/19/06
just some jokes i came across:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Three vampires walk into a bar. One orders a blood on the rocks. Another orders a double blood. The third simply asks for a mug of hot water.

"Why didn't you order blood like everyone else?" asks the bartender.

The vampire pulls out a tampon and says, "I'm making tea!"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you know if you're at a gay picnic?
A: The hotdogs all taste like shit!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese.
9121 cr points
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27 / M
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Posted 10/19/06
these jokes are flippin hilarious!
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