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Falling out of love?
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Posted 4/26/07

Hopchow wrote:

I don't think that what most people call "love" is actually what was intended when the word was thought up. It's very much overused. Falling out of love would imply that it is only an emotion or a feeling. Emotions and feelings change I don't think love does. It's much like the relationships between parents and children or siblings. No matter what happens no matter how pissed off or annoyed you get you still care to some extent. (I should say most families, there are a good number of families with no love at all.) I would say love isn't present in most relationships. Affection and attraction yes, but not love.


1. Love does change. Neurologically and chemically speaking for example.
2. Is an ambiguous word
3. See what I mean about ambiguous words?

Emotions and feelings change I don't think love does

emotions, feelings, love, "I'm tired", happy, God, etc, etc, etc.
To some love is the affinity experienced between two people who are naturally able and willing to tune into one another's emotional, intellectual, and physical states, to others is a range of emotions, to other is an emotion, to others is a word to express whatever you like, you are giving love a platonic meaning I believe? as if love was an universal....whatever I don't want to discuss such an ambiguous word at the moment. I agree with you that the word might be overused in the sense you're referring to, but hey that's language.

Falling out of love would imply that it is only an emotion or a feeling

define feeling and emotion.
I'm not trying to argue, I agree to some extent with what you have said, but saying an ambiguous word is being overused is kind of meh...
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Posted 4/26/07
As someone who has been married and divorced. It is true - you can fall out of love. I myself tried really hard to keep feeling for him the way I used to, but as the years pass, people grow and change. Sometimes they grow closer; sometimes further apart.
If you're lucky, the former. If the latter, it's just a sign that your original/first choice was obviously not the "right choice".

Of course, some people use it as a convient excuse to move on to the next 'newest' thing, but often times it just happens naturally. And from experience, trying to extend it beyond it's natural limits, usually just delays the inevitable. There's a reasonable limit to "trying" . But beyond that limit, at some point, it's just time for self-awareness.
:(
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25 / M / Im were i wanna b...
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Posted 4/26/07
wat the fuck are all of u talking about
Posted 4/26/07
I think maybe they weren't in love to begin with. They just keep telling themselves that they were in love when they really weren't. It could've been lust, temporary affection, or some other things.

I think if you really are in love, then there's no way you can love them one day and not the next.
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40 / M / US
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Posted 4/26/07
It happens. It is usually a gradual thing but can sometimes hit over night. Usually this is caused by irreconcilable differences, or a serious lack of communication. Just meeting someone new won't be a factor usually unless there are other factors involved. “Falling out of love” usually doesn’t happen for no reason.

Often the person who loses the feeling will be reluctant to talk about why it happened.
This is for several reasons – there will be so many factors involved that the actual turning point will be too difficult to pin-point, or the person may just want to avoid confrontation. Sometimes they will be too hurt by this event themselves to accurately articulate what they want to say.

It also serves as a convenient excuse for someone who just wants out of a relationship. In many of these cases there was really never any real love there in the first place, maybe infatuation, but that’s about it.

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Posted 4/26/07
It is possible to fall out of love, but I find that if a person really is capable of falling out of love with that person, then perhaps it wasn't love to start with. Of course, my thoughts on love are a bit queer.

I retract this statement.

Love is too complicated...so I don't know. Yup, I'm taking it like a man. I'm wrong, I think.
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29 / M / Iloilo City, PH
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Posted 4/26/07
like chewing gum, love eventually loses its flavor... depends on the chewer though...
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F / somewhere in silence
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Posted 4/26/07
you can fall out of love but i don't think in a matter of hours, days, i think its gradual
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18 / F / SDF-1
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Posted 4/26/07

lilprince wrote:

you can fall out of love but i don't think in a matter of hours, days, i think its gradual


You can in matter of minutes.

"You're diagnosed with what in you what!?!?!"

*cough* STDs *cough*

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66 / M / In My Bed =p
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Posted 4/26/07
time heals the wound but the scar remains ..
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26 / Philippines
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Posted 4/26/07
love factors out to be psycological and so on bla bla ,but for well love making is normal for us in scientifial ways a so on , those throbbing sensation that comes our ways everytime a person is near specially of the opposite sex thats just normal scientifically and what we generally call love is, i think only "CARE", only poets defines what we expect of love, but in truth i think there are none
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29 / M / Iloilo City, PH
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Posted 4/26/07

n0odle wrote:


lilprince wrote:

you can fall out of love but i don't think in a matter of hours, days, i think its gradual


You can in matter of minutes.

"You're diagnosed with what in you what!?!?!"

*cough* STDs *cough*



hehe... evil pasta...
Posted 4/27/07
love is a complicated thing
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22 / F / some where out there
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Posted 4/27/07
i think that's possible, but sometimes, the other partner could get tire of somoeone else....
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25 / M / Toronto
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Posted 4/27/07
You can never fall out of love unless you've already fallen before you fall in love. It is so since love binds the universe into its natural order.
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