My Poem
1719 cr points
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26 / M / Location
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Posted 12/19/08 , edited 12/19/08
"Im in a world of hopes and dreams, But not many come true. Theres glassy rain and paper snow and falling rocks and lots of clocks, ticking, tocking, stopping. Distracting me from my goals, its terrible I know, The worst of all,those rocks that fall, I always have to dodge them. Those rocks, you see, are you and me. If they hit me I could die. I'll kill myself and hurt everyone else because of my opinion. Again, I say, those rocks are I, but also they are you. But I can block them out, I dont always have to pout. My dark and dreary exterior shields my real and happy interior. I'm sad but I could be happy. I'm mad because everythings crappy... If I change my opinion, I could end up winning."
7895 cr points
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21 / F / ~_
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Posted 12/19/08

HPGhostZ wrote:

"Im in a world of hopes and dreams, But not many come true. Theres glassy rain and paper snow and falling rocks and lots of clocks, ticking, tocking, stopping. Distracting me from my goals, its terrible I know, The worst of all,those rocks that fall, I always have to dodge them. Those rocks, you see, are you and me. If they hit me I could die. I'll kill myself and hurt everyone else because of my opinion. Again, I say, those rocks are I, but also they are you. But I can block them out, I dont always have to pout. My dark and dreary exterior shields my real and happy interior. I'm sad but I could be happy. I'm mad because everythings crappy... If I change my opinion, I could end up winning."


...not bad....
well...its nice.....
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Posted 12/19/08
Almost tl;dr-ed it.

Skip lines dude. I'd given you a D if you handed that to me in a paragraph form imo.
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27 / M / Bangalore,India
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Posted 12/19/08

Chester? Is that you?
Posted 12/19/08 , edited 12/19/08

h4x0rz wrote:


Chester? Is that you?


lol

It figures, man. The expression in that poem is in teen level.

Chester going adulthood?!
maybe next time
Erehe 
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27 / M / Heretic's Keep
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Posted 12/19/08
Wat? When did CR become facebook?
Posted 12/19/08

HPGhostZ wrote:

"Im in a world of hopes and dreams, But not many come true. Theres glassy rain and paper snow and falling rocks and lots of clocks, ticking, tocking, stopping. Distracting me from my goals, its terrible I know, The worst of all,those rocks that fall, I always have to dodge them. Those rocks, you see, are you and me. If they hit me I could die. I'll kill myself and hurt everyone else because of my opinion. Again, I say, those rocks are I, but also they are you. But I can block them out, I dont always have to pout. My dark and dreary exterior shields my real and happy interior. I'm sad but I could be happy. I'm mad because everythings crappy... If I change my opinion, I could end up winning."


There's a poem thread.

53940 cr points
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21 / M / UK
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Posted 12/19/08
Maybe you should rewrite your poem again in lines instead of a paragraph....
It makes me think if its a poem or not....


Btw theres a poem thread already out there for you to use...lol
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25 / M
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Posted 12/19/08
too much violence in these poems nowadays. also when writing a poem online at least make it the right format

like
this
kay? instead of jumbling it up
Posted 12/19/08
Theres a poem thread lol.. wow it seems like the mods lost a bit of motivation on locking.
Posted 12/30/08
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