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How do you court ladies?
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36 / F / East Bay California
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Posted 5/7/07

PerfectChaosZero wrote:

Become her friend first and slowly let her know your intentions? Are you kidding me? Do you think that the way you feel should be treated like some kind of game? Some sort of, extravagant process where you have to play some kind of outrageous strategy, in order to gradually let her know how you feel while being her pal at the same time? Is your heart some play thing for you to toss out there like a god damn soccer ball? Of course not. No, like my buddy over here said, it's not so hard. Rather than playing some silly game and putting on some fake act, be as brutally honest as possible.

Get her name, ask her out, the end. I can't count the number of times I've said something akin to, "Hey, can't help but find you to be very attractive, would you like to go on a date with me?" and have had a positive result. Quite simply, just be honest. Works better than spending weeks on end trying to put on some obscure facade/friendship when that isn't what you're after. The TRUTH is always better than some game or act. Your feelings aren't something you should have to hide. That's wrong. Period.

On a side note, be VERY careful when taking dating advice from a woman. No offense girls, REALLY! I'm sorry, I know this sounds bad. But I've rarely gotten good dating advice from a girl in my entire life. It's often either resulted in huge amounts of wasted time ("first become her friend and slowly let her know how you feel") or heart ache ("Just leave her alone for a while, she probably doesn't want to talk"). Nearly all of the dating disasters I've had in my life are from accepting advice from some girl or from not being honest with my feelings. Being open, honest and really letting her know your feelings and trying to actually communicate with her, is the best way in my experience.

At the very least, if you're honest and it doesn't work out, you know that girl wasn't right for you anyway. There's no "What if" guessing games of regret or questions if it doesn't work out. You know the result would've ended up the same no matter what. Let me tell you, that takes quite the load off.


Hey I'm a girl...so listen to me. I actually totally agree with everything that was said in the post. Girls are really shitty at giving advice...except me of course. Honestly, the best approach is to just say it. You want to date some girl...tell her so. If you just come out and say it, that tells us that you are a confident person...and there is nothing sexier than confidence. Most of the time...unless the girl is a total bitch...she'll say yes...if only to be polite.

All this try and be friends bull that all you other girls are spewing...all lies. Trying to be friends with a girl is a really dangerous game. Timing is always an issue. If you wait too long...she's never gonna see you as anything but a friend. If a girl is into you she won't want to wait to be just your friend. If she brings up the whole friend issue...than she's probably never gonna see you as a potential mate.

I don't know, that just my opinion...I'm sure I'm gonna get a bunch of high school girls telling me that I'm full of crap and friendship is the key to a great relationship. But once you're in the real world...you realize that friendship for the most part is a lovely little side effect of dating someone. The start of a new relationship should be exciting because you now have an opportunity to learn all about a new person in your life. If you were friends for years and then decide to date...well where's the fun in that?

As to your concern about appearances...yeah that's important...but not as important as confidence and being able to hold a conversation about something other than the newest plot twist on Lost. Learn to listen because 90% of people really only want to talk about themselves. So there you go...take my sage advice and learn how to lure the ladies into your lovetrap.
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77 / F / in the club
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Posted 5/7/07
^ i couldn't believe i'm hearing something like that from a 14-year-old boy!
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Posted 5/7/07
man what are you people thinking? women know within the first 5 seconds of meeting you whether or not they want to get with you. That is primarily a reaction to your looks and attitude. But over time things change and they may see you as a douche and write you off.

Might as well be confident, be who you are when you are at home alone, and if she doesn't accept you, move on. Guys and girls strss too much about stuff like this, and end up overcomplicating things. My attitude is just relax, if you are a chill person to be with, the ladies will notice quick enough that you don't need to say anything.
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Posted 5/7/07
There's no point in courting a dead body, now is there?
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29 / M / atlantatlanta
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Posted 5/7/07
Point at the one you want and yell:
"HEY YOU! Yeah you! You're my girl as of this moment!
Don't you run!"

It's always good to have some running shoes prepared and a fishing pole.
60% of the time, it works every time.
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29 / M / US
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Posted 5/7/07
Ahha, halarious comments guys, keep em up.

"women know within the first 5 seconds of meeting you whether or not they want to get with you." Blink by Malcom Gladwell goes into this a bit. Speed dating ftw? It also goes into how women are bad at stating what they want, they may say xyz, then meet someone they like with abc, and then say they like abc, but they'll go back to sayign they like xyz soon enough.
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20 / M / Boston
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Posted 5/7/07
I think it's pretty simple. You take your club beat them over the head and drag them into your house. Chain them in the kitchen and don't get too close, they look pretty but they bite.
Posted 5/7/07
http://youtube.com/watch?v=zQr7B6bQ7qE

Do as this video says, and you're golden.
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27 / M
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Posted 5/7/07
tat vid...was not helpfull...if u need help just ask the friend's friend of who u are courting wit...wit wat their interested in
Posted 5/7/07
Ahh yea i seen you lookin over here!...What you want a little try before you buy?
COME HERE BITCH! *makes forwarding motion with hand*



Trevor (OP)
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28 / M
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Posted 5/7/07

kyocool wrote:

Ahh yea i seen you lookin over here!...What you want a little try before you buy?
COME HERE BITCH! *makes forwarding motion with hand*



Trevor (OP)


That might work if your goal was to be maced or shot.
Posted 5/7/07

Jorlwind wrote:


kyocool wrote:

Ahh yea i seen you lookin over here!...What you want a little try before you buy?
COME HERE BITCH! *makes forwarding motion with hand*



Trevor (OP)


That might work if your goal was to be maced or shot.



God i can only HOPE their THAT feisty


Trevor (OP)
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26 / M / Isla Bonita
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Posted 5/7/07

Hopchow wrote:

I think it's pretty simple. You take your club beat them over the head and drag them into your house. Chain them in the kitchen and don't get too close, they look pretty but they bite.


ahaha... lol
but then, i think what they need is TLC...

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M / Seattle
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Posted 5/7/07
Just try to stay out of the friend zone, its probably better to just ask her out before becoming good friends.
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Posted 5/7/07
Beat them! With a something heavy like a bat or a refrigerator...
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