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Post Reply the path to your colour...
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26 / M / Within the remnan...
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Posted 12/15/07
we each a walk a fine path in life that leads us to behave a certain way in life, our beliefs and thoughts are created and influenced by past events.
for me my darkness came at birth and followed me and noe it's almost like a guardian angel... my mother had just met my father and they later conceived me, but before i was born my father left and a new man came into her life a few months after i was born. my mother began to develop a drinking problem soon after my birth and we were later sent to our first foster home were we stayed for about a year before the courts deemed my mother fit to parent again. when we returned my step father began to become increasingly violent and turned his rage on me and my sister, he broke both of my legs... he was later found guilty in court and punished accordingly... but before my step father and my mother split up they had had 2 more kids together... a few more years later my mother began to develop a drinking problem again and then the cops showed up again to take us away from her... i spent 2 more years in another foster home split up from my siblings waiting in confusion for something in my life to happen, but it never did. then we were adopted to the pogson's and have stayed there ever since. although none of this is really my fault i somehow bear the burden that it is... i began to develop feeling's of being the unwanted kid in a package of children, that extra kid that came with the package... a shadow that everyone hated... i don't think i have ever felt love between sibling or parent and it leaves me feeling increadingly empty... that's why i chose the colour black, to represent my shadow that everyone hates...
what about you guys, what events led you to your colours?
Posted 12/15/07
everybody has his on problem but we share one thing loneliness and pain
my parents didn't get divorced like yours but they fight
and it gives me headache sometimes i wish if they split up
and having sibling is anothers problem
every night i ask god if only there is a way to run away
or a possibility to live alone
my father's family sucks i hate them all they bring us a lot of problems
my life is sooooooooo ruined i'm not totaly free i can't do what i want
on top of that in their point of view i'm the weird girl
father's family hate me my mother keeps telling me why are you like that
try to smile in front of people if they want something give it to them don't say no
why aren't you like other girls when you grow up i'm sure no body will visit you
......................................................etc
just these words make me hate my life and when i turned my room into black/red
they didn't stop complaining black is not for girls and what is this taste of yours
it's my room i live there is my own world so gimmi a break and leave me alone


Posted 12/16/07

Evardemon wrote:

Yea they have no right to take that away from you hibaaaa. Your an true fighter I wish I was as strong as you.


i'm not really that strong inside
but dealing with other i think i look like that
and now i'm trying to make myself stronger from the inside too
wanna join ! lol
Posted 12/16/07
good
you're very welcome
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26 / M / Within the remnan...
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Posted 12/17/07
our paths have started in different parts of the world but now they are beginning to inter-twine...
Posted 12/17/07
yes me too
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26 / M / Within the remnan...
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Posted 12/21/07
you know we have the darkside of the rainbow covered rather well but we need the lighter side of the rainbow...
Posted 12/21/07

SavageFang wrote:

you know we have the darkside of the rainbow covered rather well but we need the lighter side of the rainbow...


mmmmmmmm maybe
but i love dark stuff
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Posted 12/21/07
wow,I can't really say my life is as harsh as yours....

My mom and my dad were fine till I was about 5. They started arguing and finally wanted to seperate. I went with my mom since my dad was basically out for the whole day,either for work or for entertainment. My dad still gives us monthly money though,for my schooling and stuff like that.

But then when I was about 6 my mom met another man and the next year they had a son. But they didn't marry each other.

Then the same thing happened again,they quarelled and argued everyday. He always lazes around the house and stopped going to work for half a year. Because of that the electricity and water supply was almost cut off because we had to wait for my dad to send us our monthly money to pay off the bills. After that my mom chased him out of the house. Well,my brother's really hyperactive and kinda mean/naughty,so I always feel like thrashing him,but because he's like 7 years younger than me and my mom keeps telling me to be a good example. Like what the hell? So she thinks it's great to have a spoilt devil running around the house. Yeah,just great.

Now we just have 3 of us living together. But I hate being with my brother since I can't seem to get along with him while my mom smokes and can be unreasonable sometimes,so I don't really like to be with her. So usually I like to either be outside without them around or just in my room alone. But no matter what I still try my best to be optimistic. If life gives you lemons,make lemonade. >.<

I like the sky and all,since it makes me feel like I've just been cut off from the hectic world whenever I look up into it. I like blue and darker colours like purple and black. Blue cause it helps me relax and purple and black reminds me of nights with the full moon.(for some unknown reason. xD)
Posted 12/22/07

Evardemon wrote:

Now my mom has to take most of my money. Because they don't have neight for themselfs. So it's getting worst



you're an adult and you have your work
why don't you live alone ??????
just a question cuz if i were you the first thing i will do is
leaving the house and living with my own
Posted 12/22/07

ElementPaws wrote:

wow,I can't really say my life is as harsh as yours....

My mom and my dad were fine till I was about 5. They started arguing and finally wanted to seperate. I went with my mom since my dad was basically out for the whole day,either for work or for entertainment. My dad still gives us monthly money though,for my schooling and stuff like that.

But then when I was about 6 my mom met another man and the next year they had a son. But they didn't marry each other.

Then the same thing happened again,they quarelled and argued everyday. He always lazes around the house and stopped going to work for half a year. Because of that the electricity and water supply was almost cut off because we had to wait for my dad to send us our monthly money to pay off the bills. After that my mom chased him out of the house. Well,my brother's really hyperactive and kinda mean/naughty,so I always feel like thrashing him,but because he's like 7 years younger than me and my mom keeps telling me to be a good example. Like what the hell? So she thinks it's great to have a spoilt devil running around the house. Yeah,just great.

Now we just have 3 of us living together. But I hate being with my brother since I can't seem to get along with him while my mom smokes and can be unreasonable sometimes,so I don't really like to be with her. So usually I like to either be outside without them around or just in my room alone. But no matter what I still try my best to be optimistic. If life gives you lemons,make lemonade. >.<

I like the sky and all,since it makes me feel like I've just been cut off from the hectic world whenever I look up into it. I like blue and darker colours like purple and black. Blue cause it helps me relax and purple and black reminds me of nights with the full moon.(for some unknown reason. xD)


all this and you said your life is not as harsh as ours
you are a very optimistic person

Posted 12/22/07

Evardemon wrote:


hibaaaa wrote:


Evardemon wrote:

Now my mom has to take most of my money. Because they don't have neight for themselfs. So it's getting worst



you're an adult and you have your work
why don't you live alone ??????
just a question cuz if i were you the first thing i will do is
leaving the house and living with my own



My disabliy keeps me from bring able to live on my own. I'm too friendly and I do alot of things without meanning too. That can got me into alot of troblem


so that's it
then all what you can do now is to bear it
God life is sooooo harsh
Posted 12/22/07
i don't understand people anymore
all what they think of it , is money :s
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