Post Reply My Stolen Words
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Posted 1/19/09
I need comments can you pls post what you think...





My Stolen Words

I woke up in that so called ‘room’
Felt the pressure of emitting gloom
My shield of reserved good old memories
Once again pulverized into thousand pieces

Silence was pulsing forcefully in air
With a single endless ring in my ear
Abusing my thoughts with the same note
Invading my mind with the murder of hope

Resentment was burning hot in my heart
Leaving the rest of me cold and hard
Rage inside me moved under the surface
Its tongue left blazing scars of renounce

Every fiber of my being wanted not to exist
For all it ever known was a room without an exit
Every inch of it well-known and been memorized
Every inch of the room I merely despised

My shaking hands rose to greet tears
Tears that I shed everyday for years
I shed in grief for the death of rebellion
For the fading memory of blissful oblivion

I stood there still digesting abandonment
Then put on my mask; positive and radiant
I walked forward to fool the ones I love
Pretending that my life was everything but a lie…




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Who wants to know...
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Posted 1/20/09

*Claps.*
This is something I can really connect with.
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Posted 1/21/09

Kouta_XIII wrote:


*Claps.*
This is something I can really connect with.


Thank you Kouta...
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Posted 1/23/09
wows!! very well written as always with all da rite usage of words!! quite sad but very very great poem overall!! ii can visualize how da person feels also :]
Posted 1/31/09
kool!!
I love how you portray the emotions~!
It's a great poem!!
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Posted 2/5/09
clever use of words.
It also rhyme well.

the + ve (positive ) things and -ve (negative) things
work very well.

An vibrant image can be created by readers.

Let me guess

summarize like a bitter person who has woken into reality and feel the pressure of doom ( the intensification of problems he avoid pile up like mountains) and all his/her good memories were overpowered by the problems he/she had.

He/she lived in resentment and anger but on a facade to fool people into his/her jolly. Every moment of sadness throbbed with him/her. . When alone, the thought of depressions robbed him/her of his/her hope. 'Contemplating suicide' idea never leave him/her . He/she saw a lot of regret and also cried to himself/herself a lot. Everything was a lie. He/she wear a mask into the world where they welcome him/her with mask with open hand. How sad.
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Posted 2/5/09




lilpurplepanda and hyuuganeji11

Thank you so much for reading and commenting on my poem

I am glad you liked it and also I want u to know that each of the critism on it are cherished and accepted...



ligersay

Thats quite impressive that you understood my poem this well. Those are the exact descriptions of the air of the poem. I am happy to know that I can make readers understand what I mean.

Your comment is dearly and deeply appreciated. Thank you soo much!...
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Posted 2/8/09
ur welcome elanra-chan!!^-^ keep up da great work!! X3
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Posted 2/10/09
Thank you.

Was doing my part as a reader. Though I lost a little skill , forget how to comment on literature properly.
As i didnt study all Lit all the way. Bit of pity but Lit is cool
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Posted 2/28/09 , edited 2/28/09
So ... sad .... and so ... interesting! XD It's quite a well-written poem. I'd have to say that my fav. line would be, "Invading my mind with the murder of hope." It pretty much sumarises the pain this person, whomever it might be, is feeling.
I think you could become quite a writer!
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