Post Reply "Angels and demons" by reijin007
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Posted 2/12/09 , edited 10/3/09
im making this using manga studio...but still takes some time cuz of some stuff..

ive read lots of manga online so these ones are also red from right to left



i know i should have said these few days ago =P but....
Angels and Demons Chapter 3 is up!
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25 / M / Labs, towns, citi...
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Posted 2/14/09
What we have here is a completely blank slate; there's nothing in the premise which is particularly notable, but neither is it so mundane as to be distasteful.

The art is fantastic, especially the shading, which is absolutely phenomenal.

Keep going and reveal the plot.
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Posted 2/15/09
story cuisine was too bland for my liking, though it is still a bit too early to really say that. your art is, however, awesome.
by the way,your factions... are more aligned to the person rather than, as you say, their ability.
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Posted 2/23/09
Your art IS nice, but there was no hook. You introduced it as one might introduce a history lesson, which works only if you are an acclaimed author wishing to hastily start a sci-fi book.

The copious amounts of text draw away from the enjoyment as well...looking through manga I'm sure you'll notice there is far less text than in yours. Page 4 would be a typical amount.

I understand you are trying to set up a background, but for future panels, either chop up the explanatory bits for appropriate moments instead of cramming it, or introduce it through a character's actions. Using filter effects for the paneling slows down the drawing process, and I think it causes you to cram as well. This chapter had more information than I've seen in three chapters of One Piece or two of Naruto, but it was placed within 5 pages, compared to the 60 and 40, respectively.

Longer chapters with less filter effects may not look as aesthetically pleasing individually, but it balances out story flow and text weight so that everything ends up nicer.

Of course, with the limited story (but very detailed art and background information) I can't give you much advice on how to spread things out and how to draw, etc...so this critique may sound harsh. I'm providing you only with what you don't have, not how you could improve. For that I am deeply apologetic.
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Posted 2/24/09
nope its not really harsh...its actually the one that i need...since even i think that i might have tried to put SO much introduction in this 5 page chapter...XD i looked at it once i finished the chapter and it made me realize that elaborate introduction might not work since i only got 5 pages...my original plan was at least 10 pages...but since this is not the only thing im doin right now..it went down to 5 pages...
im not really sure that my next introductions on later chapters would work but ill still try to introduce characters as they appear but this time ill try to minimize the introduction....

ill try to make some pages right now...but i might be busy when they release resident evil 5 next month =P....
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Posted 3/24/09

atelier7 wrote:

story cuisine was too bland for my liking, though it is still a bit too early to really say that. your art is, however, awesome.
by the way,your factions... are more aligned to the person rather than, as you say, their ability. :)


wow. all that in five pages? :))

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Posted 3/24/09
well..uhm..hahah *scratches back of my head*....ill try to minimize the text and stuff next time XD...im still working on the 2nd chapter im only done with 4 pages...playing fallout 3 took all my time then comes resident evil 5 and theres almost no time to draw =P...
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Posted 3/30/09
I'll give this the read it deserves once I get the chance. In the meantime, I will say that I've looked through the first chapter (and skimmed through the second one without really reading) and your art continues to be so fantabulawesomelicious. I enjoy looking at it so much.
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Posted 12/15/09
Awesome! it's great to have all the explanations you've thought of and setting up your universe. lots of content is good.

Unfortunately, the beginning threw me off. Sorry. I was getting ready to meet the main star. :p

I guess next time you can organized on who you introduce and which concept you'll explain first. Keep it going tho. XD
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