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advantages and disadvantages to having sex before a permanent spouse.
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Posted 10/4/09
You get to know if they're good in bed before being stuck with them :P

But hardcore xtians will heckle you on the street.
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32 / M / Berserking...
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Posted 10/4/09
There's really only a few reasons to get married since you can pretty much do the same things either way;

1) You believe to a religion which prohibits premarital sex (and you also feel the need to abide by this rule).
2) Your social upbringing, which you would also would have to agree with.
3) Kids, tax cuts and/or wanting to exclusively commit yourself to that person.

There's probably a couple other things I'm forgetting, but I would just skip the whole ordeal if possible. Love is love and unless you're somehow obligated, "marriage" is just a title. Oh yeah, and they may love you either way, but it helps to know what you're doing when you do meet that one you want to spend your life with (which is what Sunny just mentioned).
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25 / F / Uk
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Posted 10/4/09
lol all the things you mention, JJ2T,are very true.... I think the advantages of having sex before marriage is that you dont marry your spouse just because you wanna get in bed with her, because you've probably done it a thousand times before marriage. The disadvantages are that when you have a spouse its more exciting to lose your virginity with them...first and last I suppose... Lol im planning to stay single all my life too hehe ^^
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Posted 11/2/09
I think an advantage would be finding out what they're like and what they like.
Posted 11/2/09
Getting laid and not married. <-Advantage. Rawr.

Getting laid after you got laid earlier and your married. <-Still an advantage. Rawr.

I see no disadvantage in this. Lawl.
Posted 11/2/09
Sex should be fun and not limited to serious relationships, although making-love is a special thing for those you care deeply for...

Advantages would be gaining sexual experience.

Disadvantages would be greated chance of picking up STD's if your not careful, or getting someone pregnant.
Posted 11/17/09
Lets see, you get married, you get down to business, you find out your spouse opposes oral action....
two words Irrecocilable Difficulties. If your pertned is the only one you can get busy with you kinda have to hope she's into everything, because what she wont do you cant do. Yeah, thats an accident waiting to happen. Play the field a bit. Do it with one person, then two. Do it with twins. Team up with your home boy and do some tag action. And finally do some backdoor pizza delivery. Now that you've seen what thwe world has to offer you needent stray from your partner so you can satsfy curiocity. Once you're married its too late to do the twins thing. And wel all like to see ourselves doin the twins thing.
wfg
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Posted 11/18/09
if you're a virgin, you won't have a basis for comparison. i. e, you won't know you're having lousy sex. once you're experienced the grass is always greener on the other side...
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Posted 11/18/09
Wah............ Got loads of info here!
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30 / M / where the grass i...
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Posted 11/18/09
hope i don't offend someone here but it seems the TOPIC shows a clear difference between East and West and between philosophical people vs non philosophical people.

1. Sex is something sacred to religious people so the question about pre and post marriage sex opinion varies. Of course, people are egocentric so they believe they are right and everything else is wrong.

2. East is not receptive about the issue of PMS. West is more liberal. East is more conservative. Again, people are egocentric.

--------

My opinion comes from the POV of an asian conservative

Pros of Post marital sex

1. You feel good you did the right thing and you feel self respect.
2. You are free from sexually transmitted diseases
3. You will never be afraid of unwanted pregnancy
4. With number 3 given, abortion related to unwanted pregnancy will greatly reduced

Cons of post merital sex

1. you will not know if your partner is barren/infertile (but that is not a problem anymore since technology make early detection possible)


Pros of pre marital sex

1. can't think of any

Cons of pre marital sex

1. STD (if not done safe)
2. Unwanted preganancy (if not done safe) usually causes high abortion and abandon child rate
3. may cause low self esteem sometimes
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Posted 11/18/09

Shimashou00 wrote:

Lets see, you get married, you get down to business, you find out your spouse opposes oral action....
two words Irrecocilable Difficulties. If your pertned is the only one you can get busy with you kinda have to hope she's into everything, because what she wont do you cant do. Yeah, thats an accident waiting to happen. Play the field a bit. Do it with one person, then two. Do it with twins. Team up with your home boy and do some tag action. And finally do some backdoor pizza delivery. Now that you've seen what thwe world has to offer you needent stray from your partner so you can satsfy curiocity. Once you're married its too late to do the twins thing. And wel all like to see ourselves doin the twins thing.


the west think that their partner should be all-in-one sex machine. In reality, that is not initially impossible but you can get to make the other compromise based on someones sexual needs.

example, I like S&M and my girl is not into it but given the time, she may like it as well. My point from my example is, relationship is a two way street. One way or the other, both of you will compromise so each other's need would be met.

Don't think your lifetime partner will forever be rigid. Its all about communication
Posted 11/18/09

alupihan45 wrote:


Shimashou00 wrote:

Lets see, you get married, you get down to business, you find out your spouse opposes oral action....
two words Irrecocilable Difficulties. If your pertned is the only one you can get busy with you kinda have to hope she's into everything, because what she wont do you cant do. Yeah, thats an accident waiting to happen. Play the field a bit. Do it with one person, then two. Do it with twins. Team up with your home boy and do some tag action. And finally do some backdoor pizza delivery. Now that you've seen what thwe world has to offer you needent stray from your partner so you can satsfy curiocity. Once you're married its too late to do the twins thing. And wel all like to see ourselves doin the twins thing.


the west think that their partner should be all-in-one sex machine. In reality, that is not initially impossible but you can get to make the other compromise based on someones sexual needs.

example, I like S&M and my girl is not into it but given the time, she may like it as well. My point from my example is, relationship is a two way street. One way or the other, both of you will compromise so each other's need would be met.

Don't think your lifetime partner will forever be rigid. Its all about communication


i get what you're saying, and for the most part i agree. But here in the west, getting married isnt some holy comitment all the time. People get bored, they get curious and they get annoyed. Compromise works in the movies. But in truth, american women do what they want and refuse what they dont want. We cant just smack em arround to change their minds. You get stuch with a repressed chick then you're just stuck. I'm not sayin you cant use the lines of communication, just that a "super sajin" sex life comes from partners with natural desire. I dont think you warm up to S&M. Either you have that freakiness in you or you dont. But i may be wrong. Perhaps its my western perspective.
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Posted 11/18/09

Shimashou00 wrote:


alupihan45 wrote:


Shimashou00 wrote:

Lets see, you get married, you get down to business, you find out your spouse opposes oral action....
two words Irrecocilable Difficulties. If your pertned is the only one you can get busy with you kinda have to hope she's into everything, because what she wont do you cant do. Yeah, thats an accident waiting to happen. Play the field a bit. Do it with one person, then two. Do it with twins. Team up with your home boy and do some tag action. And finally do some backdoor pizza delivery. Now that you've seen what thwe world has to offer you needent stray from your partner so you can satsfy curiocity. Once you're married its too late to do the twins thing. And wel all like to see ourselves doin the twins thing.


the west think that their partner should be all-in-one sex machine. In reality, that is not initially impossible but you can get to make the other compromise based on someones sexual needs.

example, I like S&M and my girl is not into it but given the time, she may like it as well. My point from my example is, relationship is a two way street. One way or the other, both of you will compromise so each other's need would be met.

Don't think your lifetime partner will forever be rigid. Its all about communication


i get what you're saying, and for the most part i agree. But here in the west, getting married isnt some holy comitment all the time. People get bored, they get curious and they get annoyed. Compromise works in the movies. But in truth, american women do what they want and refuse what they dont want. We cant just smack em arround to change their minds. You get stuch with a repressed chick then you're just stuck. I'm not sayin you cant use the lines of communication, just that a "super sajin" sex life comes from partners with natural desire. I dont think you warm up to S&M. Either you have that freakiness in you or you dont. But i may be wrong. Perhaps its my western perspective.


i have respect for you opinion (though I admit I totally disagree). that is why i believe no one can claim right or wrong with this topic. Different people, different nations, different cultures, different POV.

I can convince you but never can i force you.

anyway, i think here in the east, women are somehow like that since women here are taught to be conserve. I mean not too hardcore but then again, its a guys divine job to make them who we want to be.

compromise doesn't happen only in movies. it just takes time. Girls talk about sex and dirty stuff like us boys, if not more. If they are that rigid (or conservative) how come a lot of them gets pregnant before marriage? can you see the rise in numbers of single moms?

just take your time. i guarantee results
Posted 11/18/09

alupihan45 wrote:


Shimashou00 wrote:


alupihan45 wrote:


Shimashou00 wrote:

Lets see, you get married, you get down to business, you find out your spouse opposes oral action....
two words Irrecocilable Difficulties. If your pertned is the only one you can get busy with you kinda have to hope she's into everything, because what she wont do you cant do. Yeah, thats an accident waiting to happen. Play the field a bit. Do it with one person, then two. Do it with twins. Team up with your home boy and do some tag action. And finally do some backdoor pizza delivery. Now that you've seen what thwe world has to offer you needent stray from your partner so you can satsfy curiocity. Once you're married its too late to do the twins thing. And wel all like to see ourselves doin the twins thing.


the west think that their partner should be all-in-one sex machine. In reality, that is not initially impossible but you can get to make the other compromise based on someones sexual needs.

example, I like S&M and my girl is not into it but given the time, she may like it as well. My point from my example is, relationship is a two way street. One way or the other, both of you will compromise so each other's need would be met.

Don't think your lifetime partner will forever be rigid. Its all about communication


i get what you're saying, and for the most part i agree. But here in the west, getting married isnt some holy comitment all the time. People get bored, they get curious and they get annoyed. Compromise works in the movies. But in truth, american women do what they want and refuse what they dont want. We cant just smack em arround to change their minds. You get stuch with a repressed chick then you're just stuck. I'm not sayin you cant use the lines of communication, just that a "super sajin" sex life comes from partners with natural desire. I dont think you warm up to S&M. Either you have that freakiness in you or you dont. But i may be wrong. Perhaps its my western perspective.


i have respect for you opinion (though I admit I totally disagree). that is why i believe no one can claim right or wrong with this topic. Different people, different nations, different cultures, different POV.

I can convince you but never can i force you.

anyway, i think here in the east, women are somehow like that since women here are taught to be conserve. I mean not too hardcore but then again, its a guys divine job to make them who we want to be.

compromise doesn't happen only in movies. it just takes time. Girls talk about sex and dirty stuff like us boys, if not more. If they are that rigid (or conservative) how come a lot of them gets pregnant before marriage? can you see the rise in numbers of single moms?

just take your time. i guarantee results


About the single parents, All it takes is a curious girl and a curious guy. One time and its possible to get pregnant. Was she unconservative? Not exactly. Curiosity gets the better of any one who hasn't done it yet. If i told women in america that it was my divine duty to get them where i want them to be(or where they should be, not sure how you truely meant that) i'd get hit in the head or a drink in my face. You are correct in that girls have desires for dirty stuff too. Finding THAT girl is paramount. But how to know before the i do's thats a tough read.
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Posted 11/18/09
Well the advantages are that you will have fun,and you will get better and better as time passes by.
Sex is really important on a relationship,and if someone doesn't know better,and have sex after they're married,many problems may occur.
The disadvantages are that if you get pregnant,or get any STDs the other person might not be there for you,and abandon you.
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