Post Reply Afraid to come out??? Me 2
Posted 4/21/09
R U gay and afraid 2 come out??????

Cuz I am!! I've been keeping this a secret for over three years now and only me closest friends know about me. It really pains me when some of my new friends say horrible things about gay people- when little that they know, I am too. I honestly don't know what my parents reaction would be if I told them, but I don't think it will be positive either. TT_TT

Posted 4/21/09
It's not so much that im afraid, I mean my freinds know I'm bisexual. I don't hide it, I'm not ashamed. It's my mom though, I wont tell her until after i move out because all that she'll do if I tell her now is make rude remarks. So I will wait until I'm 18 to tell my family.
Posted 4/22/09 , edited 4/22/09
No I'm not afraid coming out as bisexual, but it's probably more scary having to deal with the reactions when admitting you're gay. Stay strong and I hope you'll find the courage to tell others since you've already been brave enough so far...^ ^
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Posted 7/20/09
I came out to my bestfriends and they were o.k. with it but they make fun jokes about me being gay like, "Eye spy with my little eye something that is...... GAY!" I don;t mind, actually I kind of find it funny. If that's weird at all. When you come out it's sorta of hard but at the same time, when you come out it helps you accept yourself more. I guess.. I'm not scared cause I'll be hurting myself more by keeping something inside that makes me feel alive. If everyone was the same, same skin color, sexual orientation, same race, ect. In15 minutes we'll find something to discriminate someone about. Good Luck
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Posted 12/8/09
i haven't come out yet, and don't plan on it until i get out of the house so i don't have to worry about being homeless.... majority of my friends know, not the ones that i go to church with. the only person in my family that knows is my sister, and that's only because we go to the same school. 2 other people that go to my church know and that's my ex boyfriend and my friend's boyfriend.... my school friends are all okay with it, all of the others idk how they'll react...
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Posted 10/13/13
I've been out since I was about eleven years old so I would say it is 15 years too late for me to be afraid of coming out.
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Posted 1/29/14 , edited 1/29/14
yup. when you have conservative parents who watch nonstop fox news and vote for politicians against gay marriage, i don't feel comfortable telling them.

that being said, if you have good friends who will love you no matter what, it is a good idea to start there. once you have those few people who you know you can talk to, it makes things slightly more bearable.
Posted 6/20/14 , edited 6/20/14
I wasn't so afraid coming out to my mom and sisters about being transgender. My mom cried a bit, one sister went into denial, and my eldest sister accepted me right away and has been very supportive since. This is still a work in progress with my mother and other sister, but over all things are going really well.

What has me anxious now is telling my extended family. My family on my fathers side is very conservative and devoutly catholic. On my moms side there aren't a whole lot of people. One of my uncles is pretty open so I'm sure it would be okay with him. My other uncle though... that's going to be though.

He makes a lot of sexist and anti-gay jokes. He's ultra-conservative (right wing extremist) and very religious. Somehow we got along, but that's because he assumes that I share his values and am a man. Well, yes on the outside I am still, but on the inside I'm a woman. A tomboyish woman, but a woman none the less. I used to spend a lot of time with him as we'd have BBQ's with my cousin and grandfather (called Man-Cave Q's... sigh...), but that was really just to see my grandfather who was sick at the time. We stopped having them, but now my uncle wants to have more and I'm just not interested. I have only three options.

1. Keep turning down his requests to have a "Man-Cave Q"
2. Suffer through a BBQ
3. Come out to him that I am transgender. I still like women, but I also wish I was one, and am preparing to make that change.

I don't like any of those options. If anyone has any advice I'd gladly take it.
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Posted 6/21/14
Coming out will be perhaps the toughest but bravest thing you can do. Maybe the real challenge is coming out to someone who you think will be supportive of you but worrying that they wont. On the flipside, when you can predict a person's reaction, even if its negative, sometimes that gives you an extra bit of an edge in preparing for it. And you probably have all these explanations and reasons to support your perspective which can lead to a clear-cut and well defined debate against the reasonings your other uncle will have. Just don't assume he's going to give in too easily though. Ultra-conservatism and a life-long of religion usually boils down to being conditioned (ie brainwashed) to believe one "truth" only and your truth goes completely against it. You may never be able to fix him of that.
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Posted 9/27/14 , edited 9/27/14
I officially came out a month ago. The people who were closest to me prior to that already knew that I was gay (except for one), but I didn't have like a public announcement that I like women. A month ago that all changed, however, when I got an official girlfriend. We decided to make it Facebook official as well, and I was SO scared to change that status. I had already secretly changed my "interested in" on there a half a year ago, but I hid the change from showing up in other people's new feeds. A relationship status change, though, is broadcasted for all to see, and there is no hiding it. And I have a lot of religious judgmental family members. I was worried that they would harass my mom if they knew, or that they would harass me. So that was why I was scared. Once I took the plunge, however, it wasn't bad at all. None of my religious family members commented on anything. But I got dozens of positive responses from other people (and some family members). They were all so happy for me. Another thing that was hard for me to do was tell one of my best friends that I got a girlfriend as well. I had made it obvious that I like women, but I'd never out right told him that I was gay. So I was nervous about if he'd become awkward around me knowing the truth. Turns out, nothing changed when I did tell him. If anything we got closer. We've been able to talk about this stuff more openly now, without if being one bit awkward. So everything worked out great.

I feel like a weight has been lifted!
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Posted 6/10/16 , edited 6/10/16
I've told my friends over text and few in person that I was guy and it feels so good to finally come out to my close friends. My family that's gonna be a little tough. My mom found out and we had a talk but she refuses to believe I am gay and it's just a phase. My dad just is disgusted by gays but he's not a homophobe. I love how my friends are so accepting but my family isn't -_-. Sometimes my friends like to make jokes or point out cute girls
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