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Why the human race is doomed through stupidity
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32 / M / San Diego, CA
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Posted 5/17/07 , edited 2/27/08
EVER WONDER...?
Why A 20oz "Coca-Cola" Product cost $1.09 (+tax) inside Wal-Mart, when you can get one out of the Vending Machine outside for $1.00 even?

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

------------------
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (as opposed to "special" soap???)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Hope this made you smile. =D

*Edited by mauz15
^^STOP EDITING MY POSTS!!!!
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26 / F
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Posted 5/17/07
okay. one thing. i can put on mascara with my mouth closed.
20871 cr points
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Posted 5/17/07
heh thx you made my day a little better
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Posted 5/17/07


Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while



Sorry but I will not allow that, not every member wants to reads this and it would be considered a chain letter which is not allowed here.

I think there is a thread already where this can go but I can't remember
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26 / M / try and find out
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Posted 5/17/07
ha ha nice
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32 / M / San Diego, CA
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Posted 5/17/07

mauz15 wrote:

Sorry but I will not allow that, not every member wants to reads this and it would be considered a chain letter which is not allowed here.

I think there is a thread already where this can go but I can't remember


Oops. Sorry. I recieved it in an e-mail originally and thought people might enjoy it here, so I copied and pasted. I cleaned it up some, but I forgot to remove that last part. I went back and edited it so it's not a chain letter anymore. Sorry again. =(

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31 / M / Melbourne
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Posted 5/17/07
you ask to many questions, 古参する
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28 / F
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Posted 5/17/07
aww funny! send me more of these!
Posted 5/17/07
All I have to say is:

DOWN WITH HUMANS!!! UP WITH LLAMAS!!!

Those are too true.
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24 / M / Dubai
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Posted 5/17/07
real funny
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27 / M / Philippines
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Posted 5/17/07
ha..because of global warming..thats why!!! LOL
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30 / M / vegass
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Posted 5/17/07
that was good. o and most of those on the second part on the products..they're there for legal issues. like before mcdonalds put caution:hot on their coffee cups, some lady sued for getting burnt when she spilled it on herself. needless to say, pretty stupid, but hey this country runs on lawsuits. now i really dont know if the lady didnt think it was hot or just found a loophole to make 3 mil.
Posted 5/17/07

totersmcgee wrote:

heh thx you made my day a little better


same here...
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F / somewhere in silence
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Posted 5/18/07

red3finition wrote:

that was good. o and most of those on the second part on the products..they're there for legal issues. like before mcdonalds put caution:hot on their coffee cups, some lady sued for getting burnt when she spilled it on herself. needless to say, pretty stupid, but hey this country runs on lawsuits. now i really dont know if the lady didnt think it was hot or just found a loophole to make 3 mil.



omg yes I was at work and this girl got burnt by the soup and she came back with her mom, and asked if the soup was hot and my manager was like its at regualted temp, I mean come on its soup its suppose to be hot...oi...some ppl are so retarded
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28 / M / philippines
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Posted 5/18/07
robots shall kill us all!!!
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