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Why the human race is doomed through stupidity
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Posted 2/21/08

FryingGuy wrote:

EVER WONDER...?
Why A 20oz "Coca-Cola" Product cost $1.09 (+tax) inside Wal-Mart, when you can get one out of the Vending Machine outside for $1.00 even?

-Because the sales idea of lessening a cent make it seem cheaper and a vending machine doesn't accept pennies.

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

-Because hair is made of dead cells with only pigment, sorta like when something fades over time, while skin actually gets fried over time sorta like bacon.

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

-Its not a matter of why they can't but the muscles in the eyebrows are partly connected to the jaw muscles, when one moves the other lessens tension and can move for a optimal range of coverage.

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

-Psychics are fake.

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

-Whoever decided what the word should be happened to make it that length.

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

-Everyone's proffesion can be mentioned as a practice, but medicine is the most popular.

Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?

-Because you can't stop something that hasn't started yet.

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

-Not all lemon juice is artificial but some people prefer artificial flavor and its cheaper to make than to buy lemons. Also, citron from lemons can be used as a useful cleaner.

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

-Because someone decided that would be the name of that occupation.

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

-Because there are a mass of people rushing to get to a certain place at once, all causing traffic jams and in turn slowing everything down.

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

-Probly because mouse has no certain flavor. Plus cats don't like mice just because of their flavor.

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

-Dogs do, duh, they can tell if the dog really likes that food if it tastes better.

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

-Because God didn`t want him too.

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

-To prevent the corpse from rotting from a disease.

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff??

-Because the airplane would weigh way too much to fly. That black box weighs a ton.

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

-I don`t understand why they should.

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

-They are rooms of the same building that are individually owned apart from each other.

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

-No but good point.

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

-Because that is where the airplane`s path ends.


Thus I have answered to the good of my ability.


xD also agree

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27 / M / England
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Posted 2/21/08
lol good thread, i like the funny labels bit
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26 / F / Virginia
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Posted 2/21/08
DOOM DOOM DOOM..................................... DAY !
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Posted 2/21/08

rrfloresusmc wrote:

EVER WONDER...?
Why A 20oz "Coca-Cola" Product cost $1.09 (+tax) inside Wal-Mart, when you can get one out of the Vending Machine outside for $1.00 even?

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

------------------
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (as opposed to "special" soap???)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Hope this made you smile. =D

*Edited by mauz15



pretty funny stuff, except... NEVER MAKE LIGHT OF SOMETHING SO SERIOUS AS THE END OF THE HUMAN RACE! watch this and be enlightened.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TqgJe5Ofas0&feature=related
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Posted 2/21/08

FatedEmperor wrote:

We're doomed through stupidity because of people like the guy who made this stupid threat and talk shit about his own race...and doesn't do anything about it...


Well....aren't we the pessimistic one? To be fair, you don't know me. You don't know what I'm doing to eliminate stupidity from the world. Although we all know that idiots will always be around. Your ignorance is proof of that. However, this was only intended to let people have a good chuckle at the world around us. And yes. I AM doing something to change this. I'm currently in the process of getting my English degree and teaching certificate so that I can be a certified teacher and teach ignorant teenagers (much like yourself) in the proper uses of our English language. =) Have a great day.
Posted 2/21/08
1.) The sun darkens skin because it triggers the production of melanin, a brownish-black pigment that helps filter out harmful ultraviolet rays. It lightens hair because the UV light triggers the breakdown of these identical melanin molecules into simpler and evidently less colorful compounds.

2.) I’m sure that if you asked someone, he/she could tell you that they in fact can put mascara on with his/her mouth closed…

3.) Psychics are liars

4.) The word "practice" means to work in a profession, particularly law or medicine. Welcome to the wonderful world of homophones.

5.) … stay away from computers…

6.) Tis a generalization. But if you had said “lemonade” instead then you might’ve had more of a point.

7.) that isn’t clever.

8.) Neither is that.

9.) Because extracting flavor from dirty, un-sustaining mice meat would be a terrible waste of time. I think the makers focus more on what’s easy to produce and general nutrition. Probably in that order.

10.)I dunno… probably DOGS??

11.) Because Noah is a fairy tale.

12.) Following procedure. It’s what ensures things get done right, even if some steps are only there for the sake of being there. You’re taking a life, not injecting butter into a thanksgiving turkey.

13.) Physics would tell us that the black box’s seeming indestructibility would come more from it’s shape and size relative to the material it’s made out of rather than simply what it’s made out of.

14.) When the wool is on the sheep, it’s covered in the sheep’s oils from its skin. The oils repel water.

15.) This one’s worse than 8 and 9.

16.) CLEVAAAH!

17.) Again, homophones. The word “terminal” actually has close to 10 different meanings.


The second list was funny though...
Posted 2/21/08
See my answers...

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Skin's way of adapting, hair's way of adapting.
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? I can indeed
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Because their not. If I was psychic I'd be loaded by now.
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? It's probably shortened by an even longer latin word.
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? lol exactly, I get scared by seeing 'dental practice' but everyone needs to start somewhere.
Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"? It's just a word for starting an action on your PC.
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Beats me lol
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Because he brakes us!
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Everyones rushing thus blocking the road.
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? They hunt them in their own time, thats why they leave and dont come back for ages.
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? Another good question, probably cruel, wrong, animal testing.
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? continued....and do the world a favour lol
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? Last bit of respect/make it work for sure
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?? Hmmm...
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Their wool is waterproof because it's oily, the water just runs straight off them.
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? Because their apart inside...not outside.

Every mystery can be solved if you put your mind to it hehe
Posted 2/21/08
BLAST! People had the same idea as me

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31 / M / San Francisco CA...
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Posted 2/21/08
should'nt the Air and space museum be empty?
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28 / M / Poland
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Posted 2/21/08
Hmmm, thats....

....interesting
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23 / F / somewhere.
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Posted 2/21/08
You made me happy:D

And yes, the human race is doomed with utter stupidity.
But we're also doomed from too much technology.
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22 / M / Massachusetts
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Posted 2/21/08

rrfloresusmc wrote:

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (as opposed to "special" soap???)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Hope this made you smile. =D

*Edited by mauz15


HAHAHA THOSE are the most funniest stupidest ones ive read XDDD and tv commercials are stupid as well
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27 / F / floating....away....
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Posted 2/21/08
this really made me laugh! so funny!
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24 / M / Deep caverns of t...
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Posted 2/21/08
cus of people like manwel
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Posted 2/21/08
it costs the U.S. Gov't 1.675 cents to make a penny. the metal content inside a penny is worth less than one cent
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