The Story of Vega
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Posted 12/22/09 , edited 1/2/10
(Alright... I have been meaning to write this for a long time... As you read it, be prepared for surprises....)

(So begins The Story of Vega... The story of Thara Rain..)





Prologue


"Please… please no. I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

My heart raced painfully in my chest trying to tear me open. My blurred sight couldn’t catch a glimpse of the deluging world around me as I ran through it. I couldn’t hear any other sound except the hoarse thuds of my feet darting forward and the maddeningly loud sound of my own blood pulsing in my ear.

“Please! No…” I whispered again sobbing uncontrollably. No matter how fast I run, it was still coming. There was no way for me to escape or hide from it for it wasn’t even chasing me. It was rising within me.

“Oh no! Not again! Please!

I came to a halt in the middle of the road. I was aware of the watching eyes and the pouring rain but for their sake I had to stop it from happening. My shaking hands grabbed my face, trying to keep it in as if I pressed enough it would not be able to come out again. Another wave of tears cascaded down my face between my fingers which clung to my face. I could feel it growing inside me, expanding, pouring out… I knelt down and put my hands on the icy pavement trying to breathe and surpass “it”. And through my tears, I saw my reflection on the surface of a rain puddle…

And that moment, “it” roared inside me, breaking every chain and the blue light gushed out of my eyes…

“NOOO!”


...



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Posted 12/22/09
I like it sweetie . I am confused at it for some parts, but hey its a prologue so cant say much on it. well this has got me hooked already. Congratulations baby, you have got me reeled in on this story. I do sooo wonder what is actually going on
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Posted 12/22/09
thanks love

I hope this will be good... my only intention on this prologue was to draw ppl in it soo they would want to read the rest. I dont wanna give away any details cus this is actually a part from the middle of the book

thanks again baby
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Posted 12/31/09
I'm not much of a reader , it seems interesting, there are parts that seem, to throw me off although it might be a grammar error(what can I say, I'm not good at grammar) which is "as if I pressured enough it..." which didn't feel right when I was reading that line. Overall for a prologue, I seem to be interested at the same time, don't feel the anticipation to see the next part just because, the ending line wasn't too strong of an image to set me in. That's my wholehearted opinion. I'll look forward to reading the next part of the story.
:) Happy holidays ~M.M.
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Posted 1/1/10
The description is great, but... I have no idea what's happening.

Well, hopefully my confusion will go away as you write more.... right?
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Posted 1/2/10 , edited 1/4/10
13 Earth Months Before

Face In the Mirror


“Dear Diary,

I had a blackout again. It seems it was longer this time. When I came to myself out in the forest miles away from home Lu’in was already setting. My last memory before the blackout was getting ready to go out to meet Eliah after the breakfast.

I don’t understand this. Where I am going when I lost my conscious? Why is it happening to me? Why can’t anyone see me when I am ‘sleepwalking’? What am I doing all that time which I have no memory of? I have a million questions whirling inside my head yet I don’t have a single answer.



I feel something is changing inside me. I can almost hear the wuthering whispers of an awakening entity within me. I can sense it stir at the back of my brain threatening me every once in a while by revealing a pitch black nothingness whirling inside me, feeding on my resolution. It devours small bits of me. I can see it moving behind my eyes, casting blue shadows in them. It stares back at me when I look at the mirror. The air in my lungs freeze with its icy gaze.

I can’t tell this to anyone. No one would believe me. They can’t see me when I am ‘taken’. Even if they somehow believed me – I am almost sure Eliah would – they would send me away. To another planet with freaks like me in it. I don’t want to leave Vega. This is my home. I am not a freak. Nor that I am insane.

At least not yet…

Not yet...

....


I am scared.


Thara Rain
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Posted 1/9/10
Hmm, sounds mysterious. I like it. The suspenseful descriptions are enough to keep anyone on edge.
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Posted 1/16/10
ooh... this sounds good ^^ I'm still dying to find out what happened after the prologue xD and before it as a matter of fact =3
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Posted 2/1/10
The wordings are marvelous. You can actually feel what the protagonist is experiencing as if it's actually happening to you as well.
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Posted 2/4/10 , edited 2/5/10


“I think there is something you aren’t telling me.”

Thara spilled the cold tea she was about to drink all over herself startled by his unannounced approach. Looking down at her darkening clothes she spoke with fury,

“Damn you Eliah! I have a lesson in an hour and I loved this shirt!”

She looked up at him to prove him how angry she was with a fierce glare but she met his blue eyes sparkling with an apology and his full lips unable to contain an urge to flash a wide a grin. She forgot the reason why she should be angry despite the widening sense of wetness on her chest.

“There is no helping I guess…” She mumbled. Then poking a finger at his chest “You owe me a new shirt Mister!”

Eliah released his laughter and replied, “Yes, yes, I know. This is not the first shirt of yours I accidentally stained.”

“Accidentally my ass.” retorted Thara. His timing was too perfect. ‘As always’ she thought. But what had startled her wasn’t exactly his sudden approach. It was what he told her. She looked up at him again from the chair she was sitting pausing from searching a napkin in her bag.

The sun loved Eliah. His jet black, shoulder-length hair was glittering like a starry summer night sky with the light of Lu’in. When he didn’t so carefreely run his hand through his hair to brush it back, it constantly fell over his unnaturally clear and meaningful blue eyes which had no limit to their depth as he stared at her. He had leaned forward with his arms resting at the back of her chair. Thara could see the perfection of his body through his tight, white shirt. Shadows and creases cast on his shirt by his muscles and slim torso were all at the right places. Sometimes… only sometimes… looking at him took her breath away.

“What did you just mean?” Thara asked a little sheepishly for noticing him every time she looked at him.

“Oh, by saying that there is something you aren’t telling me.” He shook his head to prevent his hair from blocking his vision. It didn’t help.

“Yes, by that. What did you mean?” She felt her heart pounding in her chest. There were a few things she hadn’t been telling him. Things she had no idea how he would react to if she were to tell him.

“Kassi just told me Aoin confessed to you.” He was smiling as if this was rather amusing to him.

Thara blushed bright-red. Aoin’s confession was embarrassing enough as it was without him repeating it back at her. It was the sole reason why she had escaped to this secluded part of the school where she taught Galactic History to the youngsters. This was the only place where she thought no one could find her. No one but Eliah which is. He could always find her. Even when she meant him not to.

“Shut up Eliah,” replied Thara suddenly too busy trying to take some of the wetness on her shirt with the ruffled napkin she found in her bag.

Eliah’s laughter rang in her ears. He threw his head back and laughed and laughed.

“You are sooo adorable when you are embarrassed! Why didn’t I notice this before?” He was still laughing. Then he walked next to the chair she was sitting on sideways and knelt in front of her pulling another napkin out of the right front pocket of his black jeans. He started soaking the wetness on her skirt up with it.

“What did you tell him, Rain?” he was serious now. Eliah was the only one who called her with her last name. She had asked him the reason for that once but the only answer she got was ‘Every one calls you Thara…

“Why do you want to know? To make fun of me even more?”

Eliah paused with what he was doing. He looked up at her, his right hand still on her legs and his eyes through the silky curtain of his hair dazzled her.

“No I am not going to make fun of you. I seriously want to know how you rejected him.”

Thara searched his eyes while being extremely aware of his hand on her leg and she asked defensively, “How do you know I rejected him? Maybe I said ‘yes’. He isn’t that ugly you know.”

Eliah’s eyes narrowed with this bait but he didn’t buy it. He never did. “I know you rejected him Rain. Because I know you. What I want to know is how you rejected him. Please? Tell me?”

Thara threw the wet napkin on the table and looked at the lake in front of her, twinkling with Lu’in’s morning light.

“I told him I love someone else.”

Eliah made a sound like ‘hmmm’. He too, threw his napkin on the table and said “That’s a good lie for rejection”

Thara stared back at him. He knew her well enough to know she wasn’t interested in anyone and yet… he was equally clueless about the most important thing in her life. What an irony it was; being the closest to her and being so far away at the same time.

The moment stretched and Eliah’s eyes were still burned into hers. It was mere torment for her. Enduring his steady gaze. But she was unable to look away because in these tiny, stolen moments she could feel something there in that gaze. Hanging in air. Tugging on her heart strings.

She could feel that Eliah knew her more than she gave him credit for.

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Posted 2/4/10
o.0 Cool. More dialogue than your usual writing but I like it. Write more, okay? This is getting fascinating. xD
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Posted 2/6/10
I really like it
although sometimes it is confusing, in her entry she say she doesnt knwo whats going on at all but she seems to know a lot in the end
and the 3rd entry you posted was awesome though! But when you said that some guy confessed to her I htought it was a big secret not his love hahah took me a while to figgure that one out ^^ teehee

Be seriously I love it^^ please keep writting
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