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Men actually prefer virgins?
Posted 5/2/10 , edited 5/2/10
I remember reading a book at the bookstore one day. My mom picked it up for me. She says since I'm "coming of age" I should know these things. It was called "Things That Girls Want To Know About Guys" or something of that nature. In one chapter, the author conducted a survey about if men preferred virgins over those who weren't. Shockingly to my knowledge, about 69% of men actually prefer a virgin while only 12% wanted one that was more "experienced".

Interesting. Call me naive, but I had no idea.

A few reasons for this is that:

1. Guys like feeling superior. They like to know that they are the only ones that their girl has been with. This gives them the advantage to teach "new things." God only knows what those things are.

2. Having a girlfriend who's a virgin also means that their performance in bed isn't pressured.

3. Being a virgin means a lower chance of catching an STD.

The irony about this is that how can a guy prefer a virgin if they want to have sex with everything in site? It doesn't make much sense to me.

So what I'd like to do is hear from the guys (and girls...but mostly guys). How do you feel about this information? Do you consider it truth?

To be honest, men confuse me. They want this, yet they keep doing that. Please enlighten me.
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22 / F / shitty england
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Posted 5/2/10
I always thought it was 'cuz they were tight(er)?
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26 / M / Florida
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Posted 5/2/10 , edited 5/2/10
Lmao. The 3 things listed is basically true and not every guy wants to have sex with everything. Chances of catchin a STD is getting higher and higher so knowing shes a virgin is a big plus strictly if u dont use a condom. I have many friends who wont date a girl after shes been with someone from certain races there not racist or anything just on that. The 2nd one idk whos worried or feels pressured but every guy is different. Virgin means tighter also good but doesnt always work out because the girl being a virgin u usually have to be more careful
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31 / M / NW England
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Posted 5/2/10 , edited 5/2/10
It's another case of 'Some do, some don't' methinks. Personally i've never slept with a virgin and i'd prefer to keep it that way, but it's personal preference and no doubt a lot of men are just as you describe.

I think if you want to avoid those types of men though it falls to you to think before you leap, although there's never really much guarantee! As a rough guide though i'd say if the guy is nice, calm and cheerful (And not pushy), he would probably not be like that. If he's pushy, popular and arrogant, then he might be. But as I said that really is a rough guide lol. If you find that most of the guys you know are smug, arrogant and into deflowering virgins, then it might be time to make new guy-friends!

And don't worry, women confuse men too. None of us understand each other, and both sides believe in the stereotypes of the other.

EDIT: Pro-tip - Don't date until your early 20's, save yourself the mental anguish of teenage romance!
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29 / M
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Posted 5/2/10
for marriage, yes, a virgin is preferable. for a good night, any will do.
Posted 5/2/10
Meh, Every guy & reason is different. I wonder are the numbers that high for women who want men who're virgins... first reason that's listed is so conceited though.
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33 / M
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Posted 5/2/10
Those three reasons are correct. Men do like to feel superior, not just sexually, but also mentally (or being smarter).

LosingOrbit wrote:
The irony about this is that how can a guy prefer a virgin if they want to have sex with everything in site? It doesn't make much sense to me.

That's not irony. Men want to have sex with everything, but they just prefer virgins. I also love to eat everything, but I just prefer ice cream. Or some people here want to watch everything, but they just prefer anime. See the difference between prefering something and wanting something?
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22 / M / Ottawa
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Posted 5/2/10

LosingOrbit wrote:

I remember reading a book at the bookstore one day. My mom picked it up for me. She says since I'm "coming of age" I should know these things. It was called "Things That Girls Want To Know About Guys" or something of that nature. In one chapter, the author conducted a survey about if men preferred virgins over those who weren't. Shockingly to my knowledge, about 69% of men actually prefer a virgin while only 12% wanted one that was more "experienced".

Interesting. Call me naive, but I had no idea.

A few reasons for this is that:

1. Guys like feeling superior (really)? They like to know that they are the only ones that their girl has been with. This gives them the advantage to teach "new things." God only knows what those things are.

2. Having a girlfriend who's a virgin also means that their performance in bed isn't pressured.

3. Being a virgin means a lower chance of catching an STD.

The irony about this is that how can a guy prefer a virgin if they want to have sex with everything in site? It doesn't make much sense to me.

So what I'd like to do is hear from the guys (and girls...but mostly guys). How do you feel about this information? Do you consider it truth?

To be honest, men confuse me. They want this, yet they keep doing that. Please enlighten me.


Virgin sure, if its your first time as well. But If I could now choose between a virgin and someone who has had sex before, I would generaly pick the one who is not a virgin. Nailing a virgin can be awkward. Jesus and sometimes they can be bleeders and that, ladies and gentlemen, is not fun.
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40 / M / Where the heart is
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Posted 5/2/10 , edited 5/2/10
If I have feelings for the girl, I wouldn't ask or particularly care whether she was a virgin or not.

Personally the pressure from "under performing" or catching an STD would be a bigger concern than the "intactness" of my partner.
Posted 5/2/10
no not really i am 24 and still a virgin I want a woman that knows what she is doing to be honest with you and make me her bitch etc but that is me >_>.
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26 / F
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Posted 5/2/10

joiespresso wrote:

I always thought it was 'cuz they were tight(er)?


I also thought it but I recently asked some of my guy friends -and my boyfriend- and some of them told me it wasn't always good because they don't last much.

I think those three reasons make some sense -at least to me hahaha- but I would never date a guy who thinks virginity is the most important value in a woman. I mean, girls can also enjoy their sexuality right?, Well, as long as you have the maturity to do so.
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Posted 5/2/10

LosingOrbit wrote:

...

The irony about this is that how can a guy prefer a virgin if they want to have sex with everything in site? It doesn't make much sense to me.

So what I'd like to do is hear from the guys (and girls...but mostly guys). How do you feel about this information? Do you consider it truth?

To be honest, men confuse me. They want this, yet they keep doing that. Please enlighten me.


Women can chose, men have to take what they get.


It's as easy as that and also the reason why it seems as if guys were after everything. Men always need more attempts to find a girlfriend and they can't waste chances.
Posted 5/2/10

sindba-d wrote:


LosingOrbit wrote:

...

The irony about this is that how can a guy prefer a virgin if they want to have sex with everything in site? It doesn't make much sense to me.

So what I'd like to do is hear from the guys (and girls...but mostly guys). How do you feel about this information? Do you consider it truth?

To be honest, men confuse me. They want this, yet they keep doing that. Please enlighten me.


Women can chose, men have to take what they get.


It's as easy as that and also the reason why it seems as if guys were after everything. Men always need more attempts to find a girlfriend and they can't waste chances.


I don't believe that's really true, a guy shouldn't have to just settle for anything. I would like to believe some dudes have more higher standards...but then again.
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Posted 5/2/10
It's probably better to believe that after you find a guy that you believe actually has the higher standards you are talking about. Otherwise you are setting yourself up for horrible experience at some point. Which is not to say that you shouldn't believe they exist just believe it when you see it.
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36 / M / Seattle, WA, USA
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Posted 5/2/10
<- me... 30, male, virgin and if you'd like to poke fun at me for it, feel free. Doesn't bother me in the slightest. lol

Saving myself for the right girl. And I'd hope she's doing the same for me. I'm a bit of a romantic. Reasons I want a virgin? 1) I am one also, 2) I'd like to experience certain things with her for the first time, to discover and learn and grow together, without either of us having too much in the way of expectations or misconceptions. In other words, I'd find it much nicer NOT to be compared to a previous bed partner... 3) much higher chance of avoiding an STD.

Now, having said all that. I do hope that when my day comes with my special someone, that she'll be just as sexually charged as I am. And I hope to explore together what we both do and don't like.

As for the comments of the author, the superiority thing... guys are sensitive and insecure in their own ways... some seek a sense of superiority to compensate, not all. As to the lack of pressure? Sorry, if she's read a romance novel, the pressure is already on. People have expectations of one sort or another regardless of experience. When you meet experience vs inexperience, the expectations of the one side are low and the other high.. balancing things out with a more similar viewpoint makes things easier I'd imaging. Lastly I think I've already commented on the STD thing, but one last comment on the romantic thing... how cool is it to think, that a literrally once in a life time experience, was saved... for a special someone? You can never get your virginity back, and unlike innocence, you can actually hold onto your virginity until a time of your choosing (baring evils like rape of course).

So.. choose wisely.. oh, and as to the comment about guys wanting to sleep with girls all over the place? yes, we do want that. But that doesn't mean we will, or that all guys would if given the chance or means. Guy's have a sex drive that is built perhaps a little different than girls, or perhaps not. But for guys, consider it the same as being hungry... with will power, you can ignore hunger, but everything that comes into view is tempting. Those guys who don't discipline themselves go after everything in sight, and then the ladies, dont feel like ladies.. they feel like meat... as is appropriate because such guys see them as meat. such guys are never satisfied. Take the reverse, the guy who waits for the right time, with the right person... sounds much like someone waiting for a rare highly desirable prize. One that is cherished, and not soon forgotten, if ever.

Heh, fidelity vs being a man whore :-P go pick. ;-)
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