Chapter 3 part 2 -School Begins-
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Posted 5/14/10 , edited 5/14/10

Aiumi Aioshino
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Hikaru and Kaito were running. Hikaru said, “We’re going to be late?! I thought the bell was suppose to ring at 9:00.” “How can you possibly think that? It was posted at the board yesterday.” “Well I wasn’t able to look at it because of someone.” “Are you implying that it’s me?” “Who else would it be! Hmph.” “I said I was sorry.” “Whatever. There’s nothing I can do about it now.” They were panting already. They finally reached the gates but they were stopped by a female student.

The girl had long black hair and tough arms. She had a fierce and scary stare while she shouted, “LATE!” Kaito replied, “We got here before the gates were closed.” “Look at the time.” “8:01” “See. You’re both late.” “We wasted the minute talking to you.” “We didn’t take that long! You have half-hearted idiots don’t even deserve to be here!” Kaito clenched his fist. He was about to punch the girl on face but she blocked it with one hand. Kaito was struggling to loosen her grip. “This is the difference between us.” A guy with a scar on his eyebrows interrupted, “Aiumi, clam down. You’re overdoing thins again.” Aiumi ignored him. She began a serious fist fight with Kaito. Hikaru was about to leave them quietly when Miss Schezella passed by. She holds up Kaito and Aiumi’s arms. She says in a calm but frightening tone, “Break it off. Aiumi, I thought you knew better. As the head of disciplinary committee, you should be setting the example. As for all of you, go to your classrooms immediately, unless you want to get a sanction.” Everyone ran to the school building. Hikaru remained outside with a passive face. “Did you hear what I said, Miss Mikawa?” “I did, I’m not deaf.” “Then, why are you still here?” There was a long pause. Hikaru was about to reply but she hesitated. Miss Schezella noticed it and gave a small smile. Hikaru said in a low voice, “I was not able to see the list.” Miss Schezella let out a sigh, “It’s alright, I’ll escort you there instead.”

Miss Schezella and Hikaru walked up the stairs. They stopped in one classroom with the sign 2-C. Miss Schezella knocked on the door. The teacher opened the door and told the class she’ll be back. She had the perfect figure except her face was scarier than Aiumi’s. She had a short conversation with Miss Schzella. After, she faced Hikaru and examined her face. Hikaru got a bit timid. The teacher put her hands on her hips and snickered. She said in a raspy voice, “You must be Hotaru. Eh. This is Class 2-C. I’m Coach Kihara. I’ll be your homeroom and sports teacher. We just finished attendance and we’re in the middle of introductions. I hope you don’t mind that you begin the next one.” Hikaru gave a shrug and they entered. “Everyone. Silence! Please go ahead.” Hikaru bows and then introduces herself. “Hotaru Mikawa. Nice to meet you all.” “Is there anything else you want to add?” Hikaru shakes her head. Coach Kihara looks around the classroom and points to the desk in the middle. “Go stay in front of Ryuusaki.” Hikaru walks to her desk. Before taking her seat Ryuusaki gave her a glare. Hikaru sat down and didn’t mind it. It was Ryuusaki’s turn to give his introduction. As soon as he stood up, the girls started to squeal and giggle. Ryuusaki had silver hair and dazzling eyes. He was tall and had muscular but elegant arms. “Ryuusaki. Ryuusaki Oswald.” He sat down right away. Hikaru listened to the rest of the introductions. She noticed everyone else included their dream for the futures. Some were noble ones like following their father’s footsteps as a respectable citizen. Others just goofed off by saying to just pass the school year. Hikaru noticed that it was only Ryuusaki who gave a similar introduction as her. As she was wondering why, Coach Kihara asks for volunteers for class representatives. Ryuusaki kicked Hikaru’s desk which made her jump out of suprize. Coach Kihara sees Hikaru and says in a slightly sarcastic way, “Alright Mikawa, you are now the official class representative. Congratulations.” Hikaru was filled with annoyance; she clenched her fist to control her emotions. She grumpily sat down and shot a scary look to Ryuusaki. She quickly scribbled a note and threw it at his face. What did you do that for?! Ryuusaki wrote his reply. He folded the paper into a plane. He aimed at Hikaru’s desk and threw it. The paper plane glided gently through the air as it made a smooth landing in Hikaru’s desk. Hikaru quickly unfolded it. Slouch back and I’ll tell you. Hikaru slouched back hesistantly while Ryuusaki leaned forward. He whispered, “Just improving your image. You’re so disappointing. I guess our leagues are really far apart. How does a pathetic girl like you become chosen as the number 2. It’s so shameful to be brought up here by the principal herself.” Hikaru kept silent. Ryuusaki continues, “Guess it’s the fault of whoever taught you. They sure did a terrible job.” Hikaru turns to Ryuusaki and gave him an uppercut. She shouted, “Insult me all you want. But never insult my past and especially that person!” Ryuusaki punched Hikaru on the face. All eyes were on them as they exchanged blows. Coach Kihara hits them both with her clipboard. “If you continue, I’ll both send you out of the classroom and give a punishment you’ll never forget. Gosh to think both of you are the top of the Alpha students.” Hikaru and Ryuusaki were glaring at each other. Hikaru muttered, “I don’t like you.” She turned to the board wishing the day would end already.

Hikaru enters the crowded canteen. A short girl with beautiful chestnut hair was the center of attention. She wore an expensive looking dress with lots of frills. She was ordering a girl who accidently bumped to fetch her lunch. The girl didn’t want to do it. The short girl got angry and said, “Do you even know who I am? I guess someone of your class wouldn’t. I’m Madison Spencer, ninth of the Alpha students. Oh I forgot to mention, my father owns the Spencer Industries Corporation. I was going to let go of that bump but you don’t deserve it!” She continues her yapping and complaining about how the Academy isn’t suitable for her standards. She was making a spectacle of herself with all the fuss she’s saying. A girl in the next table got annoyed with Madison and threw the mash potatoes on her face. Madison got angrier and threw the food of the other girl around everyone. A food fight began! Juice soaked their clothes. There was sauce all over the walls and floors. All sorts of food were crushed and thrown everywhere. It was total chaos. Coach Kihara entered. She blew her whistle for a long time. She open the megaphone and shouted, “Stop where you are!”. She had a really grumpy and scary look. It was even a scarier than her nice mode. It was like a demon in disguise. The ones who didn’t stop got hit hard in the head with the megaphone. Principal Schezella entered the canteen. After seeing the mess, she decided to cancel afternoon classes so everyone can clean.

After a tiring day, Hikaru just collapsed in the bed. She laid down thinking how unbearable today was. She felt something on her back and saw it was a letter addressed to her. It had a nice seal. The front was written in beautiful cursive which says, To: Hotaru Mikawa, Message from the Principal’s Desk. She tossed it aside and thought of how surviving the following days would be. She fell asleep with that in her mind…


End of chapter 3 part 2.
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Posted 5/14/10 , edited 5/14/10
Sorry for the long wait everyone! This part is twice as long as one part, so I hope that makes up for the delay. PLEASE COMMENT! I would love to hear what you have to say. I use those to improve on the story.

You guys can be harsh. I know this part is pretty badly written.
Peasant
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Posted 5/14/10 , edited 5/15/10
Its a great story! though, there are a few typos



and



and I was expecting Madison to get away from the canteen since she didn't want to dirty her dress XD



Peasant
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Posted 5/14/10 , edited 5/15/10
Ah~ Madison is using her privilege too much XD!! Poor girl and Ryuusaki, you got superiority issues. ^^' Haha~ Such fun characters...

Well, my comment is pretty much the same. You need to be careful of typos. Aside from the "calm down" part, there is a word there that should be "things" instead of "thins". Other than that, just don't use "after" next to each other. (I'm referring to "After seeing the mess" and "After a tiring day") You don't have to use the "after" in "seeing the mess" part. You can simply say, "Seeing the mess, she decided to cancel afternoon classes so everyone can clean."

Overall, it was an excellent chapter. We learned more of those in the alpha and their kind of character. Hmm, and you just made me wonder what is written on that letter. Oh well, I guess I have to wait for the next ^^. Good job on this part. A bit messy; Nonetheless, it was still okay.

Just asking, are all the alphas on the same grade? or are some in the older grades? like a senpai or something..
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Posted 5/15/10 , edited 5/15/10
I finished reading it last night. (By the way, I actually print the story chapter by chapter Zani, hope its okay. >.< I really can't stand reading in front of the computer. LOL. )

Anyway I like the part where Hotaru a.k.a Hikaru & Ryuusaki were fighting haha. It's sweet I could see the chemistry Haha really...i have such wild imaginations about it....I don't wanna say since...maybe that will actually happen >.< It's just a cliche among love stories etc anyway . && I could see, maybe, a love triangle in the future between Hikaru, Ryuusaki and Kai. ayyeee~


[ e d i t ]

About Madison...hmm... if ever she fights or do the same thing to that girl to Hotaru well...
Hotaru could always use her rank to throw at Madisons face, since she is in higher rank than that spencer girl.



It's really good Zani. This morning, when I woke up, I was wondering what the title of the anime I watched where there were two students running late etc. and the main character's name was Hikaru. LOL. I'm really drawn into reading you story...so keep it up! Can't wait for the next chapter !
Conductor's Seal
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Posted 5/15/10 , edited 5/15/10
Ok, here's mine. So like what dianne, saki and shelle said, the typos are still there but the story development is good. The scenes was very well-paced and this chappie is so full of fighting and the girls are really fighting back ne.

Good character inserts, nice development and long chappie. It was very nice Zani, keep it up.
Resident
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Posted 5/15/10 , edited 5/15/10
WHOA!!!!! This chapter is really interesting and well-written!!!!! there are a few typos though but it's still awesome!!!! xDD

(btw...jus a quick question...Erm...Aiumi Aioshino's appearance...kinda clashes with my character's appearance...As in...the picture of Aiumi Aioshino is the same as the picture of my created character...What should I do??? LOL! Sorry!!! I have no idea so...>.<)
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Posted 5/15/10 , edited 5/15/10
Thanks for telling me about the typos. Haha I get dizzy whenever I see too much words, so I get lazy to proofread. XD

@Saki:


@Shelle:
Resident
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Posted 5/15/10 , edited 5/15/10
OoOO~~~~ Couples!? xDDD So COOL!!!!! lol!
Peasant
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Posted 5/15/10 , edited 5/16/10
Couples eh? Can't wait ^^ Though, I'm rooting for Hotaru/Hikaru x Ryuusaki~ hehe

Ah, the cliffhanger. A little warning in the future, be careful of overdoing/repeatedly doing it. ^^~ Hmm, so nice, so nice..couples...*imagination engine starts to run*
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Posted 5/16/10 , edited 5/16/10
Why else would there be a couples portion in the create your own character. LOL.

Thanks for the tip Saki!
Resident
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Posted 5/16/10 , edited 5/16/10
LOL!!!!! OH YEA!!!!!i Forgot about that!!!!!!!! xDDD
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