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Anybody Dislike Dating?
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22 / F / California
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Posted 7/27/10
I prefer being single for now. I'm gonna date when I find the right guy.
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27 / M / In your room stea...
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Posted 7/27/10

LosingOrbit wrote:


Allhailodin wrote:


LosingOrbit wrote:

Everyone needs someone, you can't stay alone forever. All human beings yern for some type of contact from the opposite (or in some cases same) sex. Eventually, I'd like to start dating as well.


Well whats stopping you ? The way you posted that it sounded like there is some kind of advanced alien barrier between you and a date.


It's kind of hard to date when you're the youngest person in your class, most of your co workers are female (which messes up the female to male ratio), and the males are 30 years your senior. Ive met guys, but most were undatable due to the fact that he was too old or his personality sucked. It would be nice to meet a decent guy my own age, but so far I'm constantly surrounded by adults.

Plus a shit ton of other things are happening right now, so what about you, Mr. Casanova?


I see, well that would prevent one from getting a date.

Me ? Well I just simply have no interest in dating or relationships, never really have. Its just not my thing I guess. Although I have had a few people ask me out, but I said no.
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37 / M / California Centra...
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Posted 7/27/10

Feonalily wrote:

the idea of someone touching me makes me very nervous!


That will go away when you've fallen for someone. As for dating itself, it isn't that bad at all unless of course, it's a blind date. To me blind dates are usually more stressful because you really don't know that person, so if you make a bad impression that's it, you can kiss another date goodbye. That's why people don't like the "dating scene", and I don't blame them. Now when it's someone you've known for a while through church, outside activities, etc., going out on a date isn't too bad (at least from my experience). Although a friend of mine found out the hard way that you should never date a co-worker (the break up and all the stuff after was really awkward ). Currently I am single and haven't been hitting the dating scene for a while. Sometimes it is nice being single (especially during this economy) but I have to admit I do miss doing stuff like walking around and holding hands, or just sitting down and talking to your special someone. Just my 2¢.
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25 / F
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Posted 7/27/10
I like dating. But at the same time I also don't mind when i am not dating someone. I don't feel the need to be in a relationship with someone all the time. If i happen to find someone I like then good for me but if i don't it's all good, i will just wait till the next opportunity comes. Maybe i feel this way cause i am still young, dunno. But right now i am enjoying my current relationship
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27 / M / Somewhere off in...
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Posted 7/28/10
I sort of feel that dating at this point in life just puts unnecessary stress and expectations on relationships that would otherwise be great. I'm probably a little jaded though
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21 / F / dubai
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Posted 7/28/10
I prefer being single~ though i like a person sometimes~~ but until there only..~:)) im not very good in dating ~ and anything yet..coz no expreience..HAHAHHA~ I WOUld look like Weird if i did date~ hahhaaa~
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Posted 7/28/10
hard question never liked being touch,even by my female friends..how much more by a guy
Posted 7/28/10
It's okay when you're with someone you really like, but staying single gets lonely after a while (in my case, at least.)
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27 / M / A rainy paradise...
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Posted 7/28/10 , edited 7/28/10
I see dating as the same thing as being single. Date multiple women/men for fun or to find the right one for you in the long term.

Just make sure to disclose exactly what you're about in the very beginning. She'll hate you if she didn't get what she thought she was going to get. Being upfront and honest will open more doors than it will close.

Don't grant exclusivity to someone you're just getting to know...they're just not worth the dedication until proven otherwise.
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40 / M / Where the heart is
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Posted 7/28/10

th1nk_p1nk wrote:

It's okay when you're with someone you really like, but staying single gets lonely after a while (in my case, at least.)


Nope, it's not just you. I really am 34 and have social anxiety disorder. I've never been on a date, looking forward to my first kiss and so on. Trying to fix my anxiety issues to change all that, but I'm sick of thinking about what I may be missing.
Posted 7/28/10

NoBreyner wrote:


th1nk_p1nk wrote:

It's okay when you're with someone you really like, but staying single gets lonely after a while (in my case, at least.)


Nope, it's not just you. I really am 34 and have social anxiety disorder. I've never been on a date, looking forward to my first kiss and so on. Trying to fix my anxiety issues to change all that, but I'm sick of thinking about what I may be missing.


=_= Well if it makes you feel any better, it ain't all it's cracked up to be. Sure things are going good with the guy I'm with right now, and we're "growing" or whatever the fuck they say is supposed to happen. But it's not like you're in love right off the bat and everything's happy all the time. I guarantee at LEAST 70% of what you hear is bull. Something you don't have always sounds better than what it really is.

But hey you'll get there..I believe there's at least one person for everyone. And at least you're trying to get better. =) That's an improvement already.

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40 / M / Where the heart is
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Posted 7/28/10
that's true. I remind myself all the time of the 70% statistic you mentioned or similar to feel better about rushing into things.
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30 / M
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Posted 7/28/10
I have dated, I have been engaged, I came close to getting married. About 6 weeks after our third was born (our second son), she met the BBD (Bigger, Better Deal) , which happened to be a man old enough to be her father. I found out 2 1/2 weeks later and they married about a month after that ( on valentine's day). She immediately got pregnant with a 4th. (His) She had no remorse, no guilt or anything. She just "upgraded".

The last time I saw any of my kids was march this year.

I still have the marriage license, which is now expired. I still have all the court paperwork, family photos, etc.

It took me awhile to recover from that and start dating again, this time around, with a new set of "eyes". In this age where people swap "life partners" more than they swap cars and where the line "in sickness and in health, till death do us part" is more of a formality, like saying grace, rather than a sincere line, I've come to question the need for it at all.

One can be a complete person on their own. They do not need another person to complete them. That's called being dependent. One person can feed themselves, provide for themselves, and be financially stable. A second person isn't needed for this. One person can achieve success and realize ambitions in any career on their own. A spouse isn't needed for this.

Assuming the above is true, what then, is a relationship needed for?

Sex? Starting a family? Social status?

Love? (You must be kidding me.)

Love is all fine and dandy, until somebody that is more compatible with that person comes along.

I'll likely continue on and become one of those old men that are well off, confident, successful, handsome, and secure, but forever a bachelor. I figure I've had my shot at marriage and a family and screwed up.

So, casual dating is fun. No strings, no commitment, no dependency or drama. There's never the pressure of that "next step" , because it will never be taken. Anxiety is no excuse. It is just like testing the water in the pool with your big toe and finding it cold. You can either stay out of the pool, ease your way in gradually, or just take a running leap and cannonball in and get it over with.

Once you do start, it is hard to stop, another person hit the nail on the head.

The entire point of me sharing this little narrative is what I wanted to add. You can only truly enjoy dating once you see it as an extra, a form of entertainment, an improvement, and/or fun, rather than a necessity or something you *must* do (because everyone else is doing it !) or a chore.

Learn all you can, keep your eyes open and your heart clear and objective, 'lest you fall into the same tragedy that other, less aware people have.
Posted 7/28/10 , edited 7/28/10

NoBreyner wrote:

that's true. I remind myself all the time of the 70% statistic you mentioned or similar to feel better about rushing into things.


So I'm thinking you didn't quote me so I wouldn't reply, but there's just one more thing I wanna say..whatever you do, no matter how old you are, don't go rushing into anything..doesn't matter how many people you've dated or haven't dated. You're chances of finding love are as good or as bad as anyone else. But rushing into things is what's really gonna set you back. I think you might already know that. I just think it's best to take your time.

I might only be 18, Sir, but because I used to constantly rush into things, I've been in some really damaging relationships which might never have happened if I hadn't tried to settle down too early. And thanks to that, I'm having trouble opening up when I need to the most. I broke up with this one abusive dumbass I went too far with basically the first day we met, and he almost ruined me by asking for my own cousin's number afterwards.There's a lot more to it than that but there's no need to drag on. A lot of that was my own fault.

Just be careful. That's all I'm gonna say. =_=" Best of luck.

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27 / M / Unknown Planet
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Posted 7/28/10
nothing wrong with dating I suppose. I dont mind it its just that it can be a hasle sometimes. things are expected of you that I sometimes just dont seem to deliver
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