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Chuck Norris Facts
Posted 8/23/10


Chuck Norris is amused.
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Posted 8/24/10
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a belt. He commands his pants to stay up.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow the lawn. He stares at it and dares it to grow.
The new Saw movie will have Chuck Norris as a trap.
Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.
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Posted 8/24/10 , edited 8/24/10
Chuck Norris once died, but death is too scared to collect
Super Man wears Chuck Norris pajamas
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Posted 8/24/10
Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
Chuck Norris clogs the toilet when he pisses.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
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Posted 8/24/10 , edited 8/24/10
When a virus spreads into chuck norris the vaccine is chuck norris
Chuck norris can get women pregnant with a karate chop
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Posted 8/24/10

Toughmarcus4 wrote:

Chuck norris can get women pregnant with a karate chop


Son of a chop!
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Posted 8/24/10
The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Chuck Norris.
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Posted 8/24/10 , edited 8/24/10
When you got pests in the house call in chuck norris
Chuck norris has 1000 sex positions
Chuck norris doesnt get laid women get laid
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Posted 8/24/10
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now known as The Islands.
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
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Posted 8/24/10
Chuck Norris tears can cure cancer...to bad he never cries.
Chuck Norris gives blood with a bucket and a gun.
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Posted 8/24/10
in the 80s chuck norris had sex in a peterbilt, some of his cum landed on the engine......... we now call that truck optimus prime.
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Posted 8/24/10 , edited 8/24/10
the atom bomb was invented by chuck norris's fist
Chuck norris can regrow hair at the speed that only chuck norris can
When men see chuck norris they turn gay
Chuck Norris was given the nobel prize cause everyone wanted peace
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Posted 8/24/10 , edited 8/24/10
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris as the world's best poker face he once won a 1983 world series of poker despite having a Joker, 3 of diamonds, 7 of spades, a green number 3 Uno card and a Monopoly "get out of jail free" card

Chuck Norris electrocuted the toaster when it fell into his bathtub.

Guantanamo Bay is military code for Chuck Norris' basement

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

Chuck Norris once sued NBC for using the trademarked names for his legs..... Law and Order

Chuck Norris is a viable cause of death

God doesn't say Chuck Norris' name in vain

Chuck Norris doesn't get struck by lightning, lightning gets struck by Chuck Norris
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Posted 8/24/10 , edited 8/24/10


its on record that thats actually chucks fav one ..well he said it on national tv a few years back but yeah



chuck norris hates making threads about chuck norris on an anime site
Posted 8/24/10
Under Chuck Norris's beard there is no chin, there is only another fist.
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