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Arrange Marriage....
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20 / F / ☻☺
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Posted 5/8/11
WHAT?!!??! this still exists??
The most disturbing side of this practice is that there are cases in which the parent arrange marriage between their little daughter with an old man!!! arrghhh this is seriously wrong!
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26 / F / Canada
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Posted 5/8/11 , edited 5/8/11
I think if there is chemistry and both parties want to work through it, it's fine. Who said dating definitely lets you know the real person? He could be abusive but that comes out once you're together for life. You never know.

What I'm saying is, no one should force you to marry who you don't wish to. But respecting your parents by meeting the guy they chose wouldn't be that bad. You can always refuse to marry the person afterwards. And you never know--you might end up liking him.

And for the record, not all arranged marriages are loveless and end in tragedy or whatever everyone's thinking. You have to be active in the process from the beginning to the end...and the rest is up to God. Good luck ^_^.
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32 / M / Surrey, England
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Posted 6/2/11
i say no, i have little understanding in this matter because i'm from england that sort of thing doesn't happen here only to the other cultures that have come to england and still wish to continue their values, i say a person has their own mind and their own life so to that you have the only control to decide what you want to do and nobody else period.
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23 / F / נαραn
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Posted 6/2/11
I think arranged marriages are wrong. I mean, it's two complete strangers forced to get married and live together.
Posted 6/9/11
Hmmm... arranged marriages...

For me, I would just try to go on a date with the women who is introduced to me. But I would not immediately pick. I would need to explore each of them through dates to know their values in life and family.

If you are a family oriented person, then treat this as one of the ways to find your "someone". If you just want to "play around" then this option is not for you.
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20 / F / Downstairs
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Posted 6/22/11
It depends. If your parents just tossed you away to some guy/girl and told you that they're gonna be your spouse, then no. But if your parents introduced you to that person, and you got to know about them, and like them, and choose if they want to marry them or not, then I don't appose that. It's like dating someone while putting marriage in mind.
Posted 6/22/11
Fuck that.
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/22/11 , edited 6/22/11
I do disagree with the idea of arranged marriage, but the opinion differs from different people. Most people may not like their marriage arranged, but still gives in to it because they want their parents to be happy. I'm one of those people. I don't care if it is arranged marriage, and I don't really care who I was arranged to get married or what will happen to my own happiness, as long as my parents are happy, then I'm happy. Although, I might feel sorry for the girl that was arranged to married me though.

Relationship can be built up through time. It doesn't have to be like the traditional way, where you have to meet with someone and get to know them and dated a few time and then get married. It might not be happiness at first, but it will eventually get better. Whether a marriage is going towards happy marriage or total destruction, it depends on you and you're action.
Posted 6/22/11
I rape you.
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32 / M
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Posted 6/22/11
I'm not really a fan of people forcing their kids to marry in some sort of family ties deal using their kids as buisiness currency is never good. But it depends really if all parties are willing and nobody is forcing the issue there is no problem. It might save time for some people who just play the field and then marry whoever they can get becase they left it too late. Some people are too indecisive about relationships and need their choices made for them.
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47 / F / USA
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Posted 6/22/11
At my age, I would settle for an arranged date right now.
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31 / M
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Posted 6/22/11 , edited 6/22/11
To be honest, I don't agree with the general consensus. First, I don't think everyone is "mature" enough for marriage. I don't know anything about your OP, but from your statement on, "which eva guy she chooses... but I kno nothing is going to happen so.....ya" tells me you might not be ready for marriage because that is a childish attitude.

Getting back to what you asking though. I actually agree in arranged marriages to a extent. Youth should be allowed to explore and see who they want. However, once you get a certain age, then arranged marriages should be considered an option. This shouldn't even be considered though until your close to 30 and still haven't found anyone. But once you get to around that age and still haven't found anyone even though you have been looking, then arranged marriages should be considered an option.

Posted 6/22/11

johnathanrs wrote:

To be honest, I don't agree with the general consensus. First, I don't think everyone is "mature" enough for marriage. I don't know anything about your OP, but from your statement on, "which eva guy she chooses... but I kno nothing is going to happen so.....ya" tells me you might not be ready for marriage because that is a childish attitude.

Getting back to what you asking though. I actually agree in arranged marriages to a extent. Youth should be allowed to explore and see who they want. However, once you get a certain age, then arranged marriages should be considered an option. This shouldn't even be considered though until your close to 30 and still haven't found anyone. But once you get to around that age and still haven't found anyone even though you have been looking, then arranged marriages should be considered an option.



Lol EXACTLY----he couldnt have put it better
when ur near 30 not when ur freaking 16 like some south asians do
and yeah when ur that old and u havent found someone by urself ppl are just gonna have to lend u a hand and set u up with someone
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30 / M / New York City
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Posted 6/22/11
Cultures...I don't want to say something like this is right or wrong totally depends how the person feels about it I know some people would consider this if they have a hard time and some won't

I you don't like it just confront the person who's forcing you in which case is most likely the parents. there is a problem with this to because the person might not want to disappointing their parents and go through it and that might me their fate...The only thing left to do now is when they have kids is not to force arranged marriage on them.
wwe
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32 / F / where all my drea...
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Posted 6/22/11
I not in for arrange marriages i am like most everyone else want to be for love and have the chose to pick who i get to marry
There some parts of the world I seen where kids at age 10 or maybe younger get married even when they are married they dont leave to there new home in till at lest age 18 or 21 when old to really start a family to me i dont get it if they are not really ready to be married and start family at age 10 why push them at that age why not just let them be kids in till age 18 or 21
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