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**How would you save the person above you?
Posted 8/10/11
introduce them to some zombie men

I'm falling...
6370 cr points
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M
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Posted 8/10/11
Pile obese men on top of another they'll soften the impact..
I have Diabetes..
Posted 8/10/11
Injects you with insulin.

I have Alzheimer's Disease.
Posted 8/11/11
You're my wife.

My insides are burning.
Posted 8/11/11
Give you some pepto ^-^

My foot is stuck at a rail road track and a train is coming DDDX
Posted 8/11/11
I call the train conductor, he and I are close friends so he stops the train for me.. of course if he doesn't have his phone on him, then I would jump onto the tracks and pull you to safety.

I'm being arrested for a crime I didn't commit!
Posted 8/11/11
call up ironman to deliver justice

im choking on my cereal
Posted 8/11/11
Slap the cereal out of you and eats the rest of the cereal (For precautions)

I stepped into a bear trap that cannibals set up. I'm gonna DIE Dx
Posted 8/11/11
its a plastic toy

im holding a bomb
Posted 8/11/11
Hand it to me.. now run as far away from me as you can

Allergic reaction to water
113459 cr points
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F / Pyroland
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Posted 8/14/11
rushes to hospital

chokes on a grape
Posted 8/14/11 , edited 8/14/11
Stick my tongue down your throat and pull it out. Otherwise push it all the way down by shoving my **** down there (I wonder which of you thought something detestable. It's in blank. You sick dirty minded pervs).

I'm being humiliated by a dominatrix who keeps pulverizing me every time I try to escape. She possesses inhumane strength.
23034 cr points
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15 / M / boys locker room
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Posted 8/15/11 , edited 8/15/11
You know you like that!

Shizu-chan gets fed up with my constant groping and punches my jaw so hard it twists backwards, cracking my larynx in half.

v You didn't have to chop him into little pieces!
49229 cr points
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29 / M / Riding sound waves
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Posted 8/15/11 , edited 8/15/11
*grabs Shizu-chan and throws him in the nearest meat grinder* Opens up your throat to do emergency surgery. Places a brace in your wind pipe to prevent it from collapsing.


Help me! A giant Deadmau5 head is trying to eat me!

^ sorry for chopping him up. He'll be back. He never dies.
26171 cr points
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24 / F
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Posted 8/15/11
I am going to let pacman eat that deadmau5 head! :D

A huge plane is about to land on top of me
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