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Everything Goes Medieval .
13258 cr points
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24 / M / O.C. So.Cal
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Posted 9/3/11

Off111 wrote:

You might not like the guy going "All you nerd would be dead within 6 months."
And while it's not a nice way of putting it. It's likely to be true.

You need glasses to see. You are fucked.
You have diabetes, bad asthma or rely on medicine. You are fucked.
You have severe physical disabilities. You are fucked.
You are small and weak. You are fucked. (Unless you have special skills that would warrant someone keeping you alive. AND you are walking a fine line between genius and heretic. One will get you held, one hanged or burned.)
You have a shitty immune system. You are fucked.
You have an appendix. You are potentially fucked.

Personally i have a couple of options. Of which only one seems remotely desirable.

Mercenary. Hired hand, soldier of fortune. Always on the edge of law, making a living fighting for however pays the most.

Soldier. Grab a weapon, walk the line.

I guess the skills i have that would translate best to the dark ages would be hand to hand combat. Not all that useful when people are swinging swords at you.
But a solid MMA game would be damn neigh fucking magic in those times. And i could hope that some lord, would appreciate it enough to have his officers trained, if not a son or himself. Make them monster bar- or competition-fighters.
Do a good enough job, and maybe the the king himself would buy my services. Or if someone was extremely progressive, i could teach their daughter(s) BJJ. (Very very unlikely scenario. But potentially the best that could happen if i got bumped back.)

The two first options, I'm likely to get killed relatively fast. Let's face it. I can hope i would take to fighting with a sword like a natural. However, learning to fight with a sword probably isn't easy, and i assume it requires years of building up the strength of the particular muscles. But even then, sharp heavy steel swung at you will still get you killed real fast. Get struck... even IF you survive with the doctors of the day. Gangrene sets in, and you lose a limb, if you are lucky.

Math, physics, biology, chemistry. Non of it applicable to anything at that age, that wouldn't get me killed as heretic or warlock.
The languages i speak. Barely usable then, language has changed a lot.
Philosophy, not really appreciated in a time where peoples chief concern is not dying. Literature... good luck writing anything they would consider solid.
And good fucking luck grabbing a hold of geopolitics.


I can't farm, my knees and back would not hold up to that kind of work.
I can't build shit.
I, as of now, have no experience fighting with sword and shield, pikes, halberds or hammers.
So i can pride myself as much as i want on what i have done in unarmed combat. I'm likely dead just as fast and someone who has never thrown a punch once shit gets bad and limbs start flying.

Hmm, maybe i could make a living in some sort of traveling show, choking out challengers every night. But even that is likely to suck ass, even fighting drunken tough guys, you'll get caught with the odd haymaker.
Broken nose will not get fixed, neither will a broken jaw.
Stitches are not done with surgical precision. And infection likely.
Broken orbital bone or detached retina leaves you fucked.
Hell, i break my hand and it's unlike to heal properly.


To be honest with you, I'd be likely to throw myself off a cliff due to the lack of TV, computers, Internet, pizza, chocolate and sushi. I'm all about the quality of my life, and the middle ages sucked donkey balls for just about everyone. I mean, I'm 26, unless i was an aristocrat, I'm 4 years off my life expectancy anyway at that point.

I could try to go to the far east where i reckon my particular talent and philosophy would be far more appreciated. (You know, if they didn't instantly slay me as an invader.) But the travel there is likely to kill me. Fucking airplanes, cars and GPS is a thousand years off. My knees act up if i have to walk that far. I'd get about 50 miles, then either stop, die of starvation, or get mugged, murdered, and left in a ditch. Probably walking in the wrong direction.


I was thinking something along the lines of this, but didn't have the patience to type it all up. Nicely worded.
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23 / M
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Posted 9/3/11
Hand to hand combat.... all those are pretty much Asian fighting styles. I don't think they even knew about them?
53556 cr points
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26 / F / The great not so...
Online
Posted 9/3/11
I would be an archer just because I can and I'm actually pretty decent with a bow. Or I could be an assassin.
Posted 9/3/11 , edited 9/3/11
I would be a Templar in the Crusades going up against the Assassins.

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