First  Prev  1  2  3  4  Next  Last
Would You Want To Be Married? Why or Why Not?
56555 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / M / Canada
Offline
Posted 8/2/11
I'm the type of man that's right for marriage because I actually do want to settle down, I don't want to waste energy partying and sleeping around, I want a serious, committed, yet fun relationship; but I'm not sure if I want marriage anymore. A lot of my friends around me are getting engaged and married, and they're just 20-21, and it seems silly to me because I can already tell that they're not mature enough to ever work out; I personally would never want to get married earlier than 26. My faith in relationships over the last little while has been very strained. I want a serious committed relationship, but the fact is, women my age don't, they just pretend they do, when the reality of it is that most of them just want to sleep around, party, and go to nightclubs, you know, have "fun", without the responsibilities of a relationship. Over the last little while, I've been working for a Marriage Councillor in exchange for a letter of reference, and some of the shit that couple bring to the table is just too superficial, and a lot of it literally hurts my heart to hear. Just a little while ago, a married woman who goes to a Catholic church, tried to cheat on her husband with my best friend; He's just 21, she's 41. It was hard for him, but he had the heart to say no, even though she kept on pushing him. My last relationship was a train wreck; I got cheated on, and lied too day after day, even though I more than filled the role as a proper boyfriend and romantic companion. Admittedly, divorce statistics scare me, over 50% in Canada! I'm scared that I'm not going to find the right woman, and if I do, I'm scared that if we get married, our relationship will turn sour because we got married. I just don't want to get to the point where I give up on relationships altogether... I don't know how I got to this point, but my question is, where the heck are all the quality women at?!
37514 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / F / United States
Offline
Posted 8/2/11

ReaperEXE wrote:
I don't know how I got to this point, but my question is, where the heck are all the quality women at?!


I think women ask the same thing: where are all of the decent men? I've noticed that most of them are already in a serious, committed relationship.
3088 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
23 / M / California
Offline
Posted 8/2/11 , edited 8/2/11
A part of me want to get marry, and another part of me saying that I shouldn't get marry. If I do indeed want to get marry, I will wait until I'm in my mid-twenty or thirty. I want to have a steady income before I can get marry.

I want to get marry because:
1) I will have someone to grow old together.
2) I will have someone to argue about things.
3) I will have someone to sleep next to me. =DDDDDDDDDDDD
4) I will have someone to hold my hands when I'm on my death bed.
5) I will have someone to cry for.

I don't want to get marry because:
1) I don't want kids. (I actually do, but seeing kids these day makes me terrified)
2) I might spend too much time on her, and don't have anytime left to take care of my mother.
3) I don't think I can be a good husband or a good father.
4) I don't think I'm ready for the responsibility that will come with it YET.
5) (I'll leave this one blank for the moment, since I can't seem to think of one for now)
Posted 8/2/11
Don't care. I either will or I won't, and I'm perfectly fine with both.

My main reason: I'm indecisive, I don't really care, and I doubt I'll find the kind of girl I'm after.
56555 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / M / Canada
Offline
Posted 8/2/11 , edited 8/2/11

berkleyclaire wrote:


ReaperEXE wrote:
I don't know how I got to this point, but my question is, where the heck are all the quality women at?!


I think women ask the same thing: where are all of the decent men? I've noticed that most of them are already in a serious, committed relationship.


To be fair, it's obvious women have it tougher here, cause let's face it, most guys our age are pretty shitty to begin with. For me personally, I'm in a weird position because older women who do know what they want, and the few women my age who also know what they want, don't really want to date guys my age because those women are a little more orientated on having their goals immediately fulfilled, and realize the chances of finding maturity, and commitment qualities in a man at that age is low... I think all the good women are hiding with their heads in a book somewhere...

I don't know, maybe I'm a little afraid/paranoid of being one of those guys who ends up waiting til he's mid to late 20's to even be in a serious relationship, just because everyone around him before then wasn't ready, and he ended up waiting for them to catch up... I'd like to think I deserve way, way better than that though.

I'm reminded of when I traveled China with a few people, and one of them was a 32 year old who had pretty much done it all. His advice to me was "You just gotta fuck a lot of chicks until you find the right one." Neat advice, I guess. Not for me though, lol.
9046 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / F / Minnesota
Offline
Posted 8/2/11
YESSSSS <333
I would loveeeeeeee love loveeeeeeee a hubbyyyyy ~
Whyyy?
Becauseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee:
http://xxkatielee.blogspot.com/2011/05/sooo-all-day-i-pretty-much-was.html
3953 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / F / LA
Offline
Posted 8/2/11
I would like to be married in the future, eventually. It would be nice to have someone, always there when you need it, and to feel like I am needed, instead of, well, not needed. I'd hate to be a nag though.
37514 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / F / United States
Offline
Posted 8/3/11


I'm actually impressed that you are so mature. If I hadn't gotten pregnant at 19, I doubt I'd be the way I am today. When I discovered that I was pregnant, it was either cope and mature, or deny it and get rid of the baby. I obviously chose to keep her, so I had to grow up. You'd be amazed at how quickly you can get your shit together once you realize that someone's life depends on you succeeding in yours.

Regarding guys our age...well, many are not prepared for a child. In my experience, the few men that thought they could handle it were turned off by the fact that I couldn't hang out every weekend, or come over at o'dark thirty. I mean, I suppose I could have but I chose not to, seeing as how my main responsibility is caring for Berkley. She's not my mother's responsibility so I have a difficult time pawning B off on her. Because of this, I rarely go out without her. Not all men are ready for that, which is understandable, but disheartening for me.
1448 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / M / Clock Town - Milk...
Offline
Posted 8/3/11
If I loved the person... Then of course.
51835 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
30 / F / Kentucky
Offline
Posted 8/3/11
Yeah, I wanna get married. I don't know a single person who's parents aren't divorced (mine hate each other) but I seriously believe that I can do better than them. It's all about being willing to forgive flaws and work on the relationship. I've been with my man for 8 years, since I was 16 years old, and to marry him would be the best day of my life. I'll never let my relationship grow stagnant and fail like my parents did. I won't get pregnant just to trap him, like his mom did to his dad. We can be happy together forever if we both stay honest and have the drive to keep things fresh. I feel sad for people who don't believe in love or marriage, but I can honestly understand why people would feel that way. I hope all of the people who are scared of marriage will realize one day that it's not supposed to be scary or unhappy. That's just the way we've always seen marriage since our generations parents tend to give up and get divorced. So yeah. That's my 2 cents.
Posted 8/3/11
yea but only when the time is right
Posted 8/3/11 , edited 8/3/11
I'm very independent and weird when it comes to guys....

When I'm single (single right now hehe) and like a guy, I want to be with him. Once we start going out, I get bored and don't want to be with him anymore, so I go back being single again... it's not something I'm proud of, wish I could find a guy that can make go crazy while I'm with him, you know, interested in him, wanting to please him and enjoy things along with him but once I get the chance I just lose all interest.

That's why i don't think I could marry anyone, but I'd love to have one or two kids, would like to be a single mother.
37514 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / F / United States
Offline
Posted 8/3/11

kirika202 wrote:

I'm very independent and weird when it comes to guys....

When I'm single (single right now hehe) and like a guy, I want to be with him. Once we start going out, I get bored and don't want to be with him anymore, so I go back being single again... it's not something I'm proud of, wish I could find a guy that can make go crazy while I'm with him, you know, interested in him, wanting to please him and enjoy things along with him but once I get the chance I just lose all interest.

That's why i don't think I could marry anyone, but I'd love to have one or two kids, would like to be a single mother.


This is exactly me! I'll really like someone but then after we date for a few months, my feelings start to fade. It's mostly a security thing for me, though. If I'm starting to get close with a guy, I tend to pull away, especially if I think I'm starting to love him. I don't like being vulnerable and being in love puts you in a position to be hurt. I just need a guy who won't put up with my bullcrap and will pull me back when I try to leave.

Yes, I realize I'm asking for a lot.
Posted 8/3/11

berkleyclaire wrote:


kirika202 wrote:

I'm very independent and weird when it comes to guys....

When I'm single (single right now hehe) and like a guy, I want to be with him. Once we start going out, I get bored and don't want to be with him anymore, so I go back being single again... it's not something I'm proud of, wish I could find a guy that can make go crazy while I'm with him, you know, interested in him, wanting to please him and enjoy things along with him but once I get the chance I just lose all interest.

That's why i don't think I could marry anyone, but I'd love to have one or two kids, would like to be a single mother.


This is exactly me! I'll really like someone but then after we date for a few months, my feelings start to fade. It's mostly a security thing for me, though. If I'm starting to get close with a guy, I tend to pull away, especially if I think I'm starting to love him. I don't like being vulnerable and being in love puts you in a position to be hurt. I just need a guy who won't put up with my bullcrap and will pull me back when I try to leave.

Yes, I realize I'm asking for a lot.


Don't we all? It is completely normal to ask for such qualities, especially if you had to endure the women/men's crap. Unfortunately that rarely comes around does it?
1348 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M
Offline
Posted 8/3/11
Being married technically has its benefits tax wise, and it's suppose to be symbolic of a promise to be life long companions. Most people misunderstand that and you can have a life long relationship just as well without being in a marriage. Personally, being married or not doesn't matter to me at this moment. Perhaps...when I'm ready to have kids is when I'll think strongly about being in a marriage. But, that won't be till I'm around 30.
First  Prev  1  2  3  4  Next  Last
You must be logged in to post.