(it means rejected love)
I don’t even know how I got into this situation myself..
Oh wait, yeah I do.
It all started after I left that stupid, rich, snobbish school. Then entered Hell in a different one. Things never change, do they?
I fell in love at my old school. It was the school I left, the school I had to leave to protect my heart. I know it sounds stupid and selfish, and childish, but I gave my parents a smarter reason than that, of course! I wasn’t so stupid.
I thought maybe, I was cursed... there was no other explanation. In my new school, everyone seemed to travel in two’s, hand holding little love birds, it was gross... I felt bad for them. - High school love never really lasted.
It seemed to become a trend in the world, after school, come hand in hand with your potential other to the school garden,
And break their heart.
It made me so angry just thinking of it!
I dreaded that cursed day Cupid comes down and shoots arrows in peoples' arse! (Valentines Day)
But here, Arrow Arse Day was everyday! Don’t get me wrong, beyond this stupid middle school/high school there is people who truly love each other and say it everyday. Their kind of love is real, magical, and something I really envy...
I knew I’m probably still too young to think so maturely, but I can’t help it. A heart needs room to grow, right?
I made a few friends the first weeks of this new school, with this cruel tradition. They reminded me of myself, they didn’t take any crap and disliked guys just as much as I did.
Which is probably why we followed this one guy after class, heheh. He was one of those good looking jerks, who had the face of someone who was going to break a heart today.
We wanted to stop him.
I don’t even know myself how I got into this situation myself..
Oh wait, yeah I do.
“There he is! Don’t lose sight, girls!” I whispered loud enough for them to hear in the bush we hid, they stuck their heads out once more,
“He’s walking with a smile on his face...”
“He’s getting closer to the girl waiting for him!”
“Is that. . .”
“THE STRIPED CARNATION IN HIS HAND?!” I jumped out of the bush before they could even blink, making a run for the star-crossed couple. I stumbled a bit, being a hero always got me a little clumsy.
But if he was going to break up with her, why not do it in a nicer manner!? This was so rude! There was probably other students hiding places, watching this scene unfold! Probably taking pictures on their cell phones...!
“Stop right there!” I made it to them in breathless skips, palms falling to my knees before them. “Before that.... think about what you’re doing!...”
When I had the chance to look up at them, they gave me an unusual glare.
“Moment. Ruined.” I heard the girl mumble angrily under breath to me, an obvious frown to her face.
I blinked cluelessly, just realizing until it was already too late. “W-what... a rose?” My eyes traveled to the rose in his hand, which meant love... which meant acceptance...
The two couples ignored me a second later like I disappeared, looking at each other with hearts in their eyes.
“Nena, yes. I’ll go out with you. My heart aches for you.”
I took a half step back, I guess I was wrong.
“Oh, Teito! I’m so happy!” They jumped into each others arms.
Okay, now was the time to leave.
I bowed awkwardly, walking back to the bush in a gloom, head hanging down. I really didn’t want to speak with my friends. Why didn’t they tell me sooner?!
“Yutifa! Yutifa! We tried to tell you, but you ran off too fast!”
Yeah, yeah. I thought.
I don’t know what came over me, but I kept walking on. Until I reached the main gate of the garden, kicking flowers in my way, I stopped there to get lost in my own selfish thoughts.
Was it really okay to keep doing this? I wasn’t a hero this way. Who was I to stop the inevitable anyway?
I felt a presence pass by me, golden locks were all I remembered and he was gone with the cherry blossom falling from the trees, following him in the wind.
I turned back around to look ahead of me, there was a girl raising her hand to her face for a reason.
She walked out of the gate, crying.
It made sense now, no one wanted to see a stupid acceptance, they wanted to see this breakup.
Wow, such a sad ending for part one.
omg! please write more! good story! :3
thanks for your comments :D.
(they help me update faster) which i'll be doing soon c:
I clutched my fists, ready to punch somebody in the face.
I was too late to stop the inevitable, it seems.
As I watched the girl walk away, she reminded me of myself. I couldn’t just stand there and watch her walk away feeling so down...
“H-hey! Wait up...!”
I ran after her like I was the only one who could stop her crying.
She stopped momentarily at my voice, but there was no sign of her turning around and looking at me, so I just spoke, “I...uhm... cheer up!”
That’s all I could come up with? How pathetic. If someone told me that, I would hate them forever. But she did say something, in a teary voice, “Go away. Just leave me alone...”
I shook my head, taking a step further and touching her shoulder lightly, “Hey, it’s not the end of the world! Just forget that jerk...”
It was easier said then done. I stepped back in shock when she spun around and started yelling at me with her tears still falling, “You just don’t understand, do you!? Everyone saw that! I’m never going to live this down...”
I stood there in empathy. “If you hate this school so much and it’s tradition, then why don’t you leave?”
Why didn’t I leave? Well, that was easy. Because I promised my parents I would stick to this school, no more moving for me.
She was still wiping off tears,
“I can’t leave. I have a scholarship here... and I don’t care about the stupid tradition. I don’t care what happens to my heart as long as I reach my dream...”
Her words shook my soul a bit. When I said nothing, her voice dropped, as if sharing a secret with me.
“This school... wasn’t always like this. There existed no tradition like this. Until that new transfer student showed up...” there seemed to have been a hidden meaning in her last sentence, like a volcano ready to burst any second.
So SOMEONE was to blame. I thought.
She broke eye contact and looked down at the carnation of rejection danging from her hand, she looked so sad holding it.
I couldn’t stop my voice from sounding so menacing, “Who?”
Her voice sounded scared. “Huh...?
“Who started the tradition?”
The seriousness of my voice must have alerted her, in a bad way. “W-why? What are you going to do...? There’s no breaking Nato’s tradition!”
I looked up at her with a fiery expression at her slip of tongue, “Nato, is it?”
She looked about ready to run for it. That is, before she threw the carnation next to me, running away.
I looked at it and blinked, picked my foot up, and started squishing it to death.
The name kept running through my head, as if I’d heard it before somewhere...
Like poison, the image of that striped carnation wouldn’t leave me alone, but even if I squished it to death it wouldn’t stop this tradition... it wouldn’t stop the countless tears that fell upon that girls face. I wonder if she would really be okay...
I seemed to scare her a little back there, oh well.
I’ve learned the hard way, that time heals everything. You just have to keep going on.
I was in home room, bored as always. The whole class were my friends, and everybody always got in trouble for talking. One of the guys I started to like, Noa, had been in that class too. He sat just in front of me, I never really had the courage to talk to him.
Only one day in particular, it was gray and cloudy outside, I was watching the clouds pass, and then rain started hitting the glass window.
I looked back at Noa. I could always picture the back of his head everywhere I go, I memorized every hair line, the structure of his head, how his head would inch down when he started writing, I noticed when he would get bored, he would lean his head back a little, and I just wanted so badly to talk to him.
I remembered saying something to him on that rainy morning,
“It’s raining. . .”
I don’t even know myself who I was talking to. But, he looked back at me, and replied as he turned to me, looking outside the window with a bright smile.
“It’s supposed to stop soon...”
After school ended, I was walking home with my friends, the sky above was clearing, and the sun peeked every so slightly through the clouds. “He was right.”
I started to have more urges to say something to him now, but nothing would come into mind except the weather, which would always remain sunny these days.
The class ended with no words exchanged, but I got some advice from my friends who were boy obsessed, it helped, a bit. I either would spend the rest of the school year waiting for something that wouldn’t happen, or make it happen before time runs out.
Who knew where our futures would lead us after middle school?
It was strange, I was never so nervous around anyone else. I was friendly and outgoing, but not around Noa... I didn’t get it.
He turned around in his desk to look at me, “Yeah?”
Hurry up! Ask him already. It’s been too long! YOU CAN DO IT YUTIFA!
The classroom whispering didn’t help... they made even more unsure.
“Will you... uh... g-go out with me?”
The whole class went silent.
My palms began to get even more sweaty, and my face felt hot. This was such an innocent crush... that’s all it was at the time.
“I thought you’d never ask.”
We held hands today. We walked out of school together, everyone thought we were the cutest couple. Instead of going directly home, Noa wanted to take me to the park just a couple blocks away from the school.
I remember that park from when I was little.
I looked around the familiar park filled with so much childish memories and laughter, “I love this park...”
The sun was beginning to almost set on this perfect day, March the 10th.
We played on the slides a bit, helped each other climb through the monkey bars, and finally took a break on the swings.
We were in blissful silence for a while, just enjoying closing our eyes as we swing in the air. It was the greatest feeling in the world. Being able to imagine to fly and just be free.
He walked me back home 10 minutes later, kissed me good-night on the cheek and told me he couldn’t wait to hang out with me again tomorrow.
The days continued on the same as March 10th, and one weekend my family had decided to go there one Sunday.
I was surprised, I hadn’t been there since I was maybe 3 or 4, but I’m always there with Noa.
I wanted to be there with Noa, too, but he was at church with his family at that time.
I played around with my baby brother on the slides, letting him sit on my lap as we went down together. We had a picnic an hour later on the parks hill, more and more families around the neighborhood began gathering, they were all our friends.
One of the families I hadn’t recognized though, who sat far away on benches quite silently, which was strange. They seemed lonely... so I decided to go up to them and their son, who looked about my age.
“Hi there! Did you just move in to this neighborhood? I don’t remember seeing you guys around... anyway! Want to join those families over there and eat nice food with us?” I was smiling so big, pointing over to the hill.
The family looked at me strangely for a while, before sending away their only son. “Why don’t you go play with the nice girls family, sweetie? We’ll be here.”
I looked at the little boy and smiled, it seemed like he couldn’t deny his parents. As we walked back to the hill in awkward silence, I decided to introduce myself, “I’m Yutifa by the way! I go to school around here. I like oranges!”
The boy was frowning at my introduction, I laughed nervously. “Did I say something strange-?” I rubbed the back of my head.
He finally spoke, and when he did I froze in walking any further, “I know who you are. I see you around school all the time, with that boyfriend of yours. You two always come to this park, as well. You started going out on March the 10th, and have been inseparable ever since.”
I stared at him with a stupid look on my face, my mouth hung open but I didn’t know what to say,
“Oh, and I like banana’s...”
I chuckled nervously again, but there was fright in it. The golden haired boy walked up to me.
“When things don’t work out, come talk to me.” he handed me a card, I stared at it deeply. I was hesitant to grab it at first, but I did to ease the tension. I was reading it, and by the time I looked back up, ‘N’ was already meeting my parents.
The night was full of a series of confusing dreams, that I immediately couldn’t remember when I awoke in the morning. I came to school today with a goal. Find Nato. Whoever he was, he was the reason for this tradition.
Calette and Dedee met up with me halfway to school, “Yutifa! You’re not still mad at us from before are you?”
I laughed at them, “No. Of course not! It’s my own fault for jumping to conclusions like that...” we always made up that way, always having stupid fights. But I needed my friends beside me, they were the brains of this operation when I just acted like a complete idiot whenever I saw the demonic flower.
“By the way, do you guys know someone by the name of Nato?” I asked curiously, looking at them both while walking. Calette looked at Dedee, and then me, “Of course... Yutifa. What kind of joke is that?”
Dedee retorted, “What she means is, who DOESN’T know him?”
“I don’t!” I defended a bit hotly, they looked worried at me,
“...How could you not know about him? He’s like the star of the school!”
I was so confused... how come I’ve never layed eyes on this guy then!?
Did they not know he was Mr. Striped Carnation? Maybe they did... but maybe they didn’t care either way. Maybe that girl was right, there was no stopping it? Maybe I shouldn’t think so much...
I decided to keep my lips shut about the matter, shrugging, “Welp, I don’t know him. You two care to introduce me?”
“I wish I could, too!” Dedee opinionated.
Calette looked at me as if I was such a fool to not know him,
“It’s almost impossible to get a minute alone with this guy, since he barely attends school nowadays. He skips a lot, I hear. And spends most of his time in the garden after school.”
Breaking hearts, maybe?
By the time we reached school, I never intended to meet the guy before I could think of a plan on what to do with him when I saw him face to face...
All I saw in the hallway were a bunch of blurred faces, moving too fast for me to even remember a second later, I was never that good at remembering strangers faces that pass in my lifetime. Or even names. They would have to leave a strong first impression.
But how could I forget a guy like Nato? If I ever knew him.
I entered class with my friends that morning. Class would always go on the same usual way when I walked in; everyone would stare at me a lot like they were familiar with me. Well I guess they had a reason to be, I was with them almost everyday in this hell hole.
I glared at them, about five were around my desk, some leaned against their desks, some scooted their chairs...something was going on.
“Oh, there she is!...”
“I wonder who left that there...”
I began walking up to my desk now frantically, moving people aside to see what the commotion was about. Once I was at my desk, everyone else moved away to their seats when the teacher had walked in.
“WHAT THE HELL... IS THIS!?”
Everyone shut up when they heard my voice. I heard my teacher say something, probably a command of something, but I failed to listen. I just stood there over the striped carnation placed on my desk. The mere reality of that carnation on my desk, for me, burned my eyes.
Someone from behind me tapped my shoulder, I flinched. “Yutifa... come on. Just forget about it... its probably just some stupid prank-”
I rushed out of the classroom without even listening to a word, Calette, Dedee, I’m not sure who was even talking to me... the only things that crossed my mind...
And it hurt just like the first time.
But this wasn’t like me... why would I be hurt? I don’t know who sent me it... but the fact still remains; someone out there wanted to see this frown placed on my face.
Oooh, interesting. I would like to read more.
To who knows where; my eyes were closed, all I could hear were my footsteps taking me somewhere, anywhere but that haunting classroom. I think I was sobbing by the time I reached the girls' bathroom.
And when my eyes fluttered open, there stood two girls next to the mirror, staring at me like I was a ghost, one of them dropped their lipstick and left it there. “Go-” Before I even finished my sentence, they were gone through the door. I sat in a bathroom stall and brooded who knows how long.
If any of my friends saw me like this... it would be bad news. They wouldn't look up to me anymore as their big, strong, sister. I would be the little sister, always hurting herself and crying.
It was pathetic, really.
When I thought my eyes had dried up, and looked in the mirror to see my puffy eyes less red, I decided to leave the bathroom once in for all.
I feel bad for the next person who has to use my stall. All the toilet paper is pretty much gone.
I ignored something strange though while I was still in the bathroom, it seemed to be someone on their cellphone, or some sort of cellular device, and I heard an authority kind of voice through the other end.
It sounded like police.
As I walked in a single hall, it was completely deserted of students. Of course, class was still going on... but for it to not be even one student? It didn't make sense, students here always asked for passes just to get out of class. Then another hall, then another, then another... I went back to my classroom.
I walked to the window, for some reason having a queasy feeling to my stomach. I almost couldn't catch my breath at the sight;
Their were students piled all over on the school grounds, surrounding the Gymnasium building.
Where a boy was standing on top of the roof, his arms in the air. Attempting to fall.
I wanted to shout, yell, scream for him to stop. But I couldn't even move, and my intuition was screaming for me to do the right thing.
And that's when the classroom door shut, and I most definitely left it open. There stood a figure, no, a person, a boy.
“Are you Nato?” It just sort of slipped out, I glared furiously at him, unwavering.
I wanted to take a desk, and throw it at him. And I probably could, too. I had strange upper strength for a girl.
I don't even know why I had to ask, how could it not be that bastard from my past? Golden hair. And that annoying childish like face... he could easily look so innocent to anyone. But I'm no fool.
Just as I was about to open my mouth and repeat myself again, I heard him say,
I inwardly gasped to myself. No? No...? Not only is he a bastard, but a lier too!
This wasn't going anywhere, I was wasting time... and the boy on the roof wanted out of this world. But here stood the boy I had been searching for - Nato. Mr, Striped Carnation himself.
I gritted my teeth, clenched my fists, about to attack him like a wild animal. I couldn't hold it in any longer.
“No matter what lies you babble, I won't let you keep doing what you’re doing to this school anymore!” My heart was crying out, "You’re tradition ends here!” I was shouting, I wanted everyone down their to hear it, I wanted to undo this unjust curse that this school held.
It seemed like a lifetime of my burning glare on his sad looking expression... which boggled my mind. Sad expression?
He made a swift movement behind his back, something I was too late to stop. He pulled out a knife.
Now, I sort of felt scared and at a disadvantage. But then something weird happened- he aimed the knife and it went past me, through the window. And my intuition told me that's what he was planning all along. I looked behind me too long to realize he was right behind me when I faced him.
“The knife should thwart him of his decision for a bit- but not long enough. Don’t worry, it didn’t hit him, just went past him.”
I looked at him with wide-eyes. Just what the hell was going on? Since when was he an expert knife thrower? The look on his face- it was odd to me, and the way he looked at me almost made me believe his intentions were good, almost.
But this was my chance. His face was so close now, I could punch him right in the face! But... I didn't. For some reason I felt a sense of calm.
“I am his twin brother...”
I heard him mumble, and it was like everything I thought I'd known about Nato was just a joke. A twin brother?
“My name is... Hato. It is nice to meet you.” I winced at that sad attempt of his smile.
Awkwardly, I burst into a laugh and slapped him across the face, he landed to the floor.
“Don’t mess with me, you little faker!”
I was panting by the time he landed on his knees to the ground, looking so pathetic it made me smile. “You’re NOTHING but a coward!”
I bent down and grabbed him by his shirt, lifting him up to meet my face. “Please believe me...! I...” I didn't let him finish, because the look on my face was probably making him pee his pants.
“Why should I even take a moment to listen to you!?” I couldn’t stop this anger from spilling out of me, it was uncontrollable to a point that I thought of going insane.
“Because... do you really think the real Nato would let you slap him? I am not my brother... please believe me...”
Interesting, interesting! More, please?
Goodbye, mofos! XP
Maybe it was my intuition again, or I was listening to my heart- god how I hated that phrase. But something told me he was speaking the truth. I sighed, with that letting him go.
I still didn't trust him. I was still so confused about this twin brother thing.
“Umm...” I barely heard his small voice, he was looking to the floor, almost afraid to look me in the eye. And I wouldn't blame him.
“Could you... could you do it again?”
I stared at him, tilting my head. “Huh...?” This definitely couldn't have been Nato, unless this was all some deception...
I looked down at him, I knew he could feel my glare. My fierce glare that kept his head down and his voice low. “Do what?”
Slowly, but steadily, he was picking his head back up. His eyes were watering, I almost felt bad for this kid. I didn't know what to say. Why did he look so scared? So... guilty.
“Slap me. I deserve it... more than once. For everything I've done...” His head went back down, he started sobbing. I don't know why my heart immediately ached for this stranger... I felt like crying with him, I felt like laughing at myself. Somehow, he reminded me of a brother I never had.
I watched him take his wrist to his nose numerous times before I said anything,
“Stand up.” I commanded him, it took him moments to stand up and look at me eye-level.
“I'm not gonna slap you again.” I said finally, he sniffed, looking past me.
“Please go. Time is running out for him...”
I had almost forgotten. How could I have forgotten? Why did this "Hato" character put the weight of that boys life on me? What made me so special? The random questions popping in my head were only a distraction, I bit my lip.
“Go!” By then, he was literally pushing me out of the door. I stumbled forward and tried to say something- but I was found looking at the closed door in dismay. He had whispered something to me before he slammed that door and locked it.
“Please, try to keep an open mind.”
What exactly did he mean?
I pushed through the crowd of people, trying to get a better view from up above. When I tried to get closer, the police told me to back away and let them handle their business. Naturally, I ignored them. What could they do but scream in their bullhorn and yell stupid meaningless words? This boy was clearly troubled and needed a friend.
So I guess that had to be me. “Hey! You up there!” I was putting my hands around my mouth, making myself loud and clear without even a bullhorn. The police officers looked at me, I gave their looks no second thought, I know they only thought of me a little child.
I felt the crowd around me grow louder and more antsy, I had heard car doors slam in the background, it was probably some of the students parents trying to 'help.' This probably was making news as we speak. I yelled again,
“WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU WOULD MAKE SAD IF YOU JUMP!?”
I was scared for this boys life, terrified.
I felt a pair of hands from behind touch me, I barked back and looked at them, “Don’t touch me-!”
“But it’s us, Yutifa... your friends.”
Calette and Dedee.
I froze, eyes as wide as could be, the realization of knowing my friends were beside me made me a little calmer. But I was still so scared. “Oh, you guys...”
They looked to each other, then to me, I knew those expressions. They were hiding something from me. “You remember Yutifa... remember that day we saw those two couples in the garden?” Dedee was saying, Calette was stiff.
“Yeah?” I was quiet, while everyone else around me were in a frenzy. Dedee and Calette were looking up toward the boy.
“Well... the one carrying the rose back then, that’s him up there...” Calette had said this, and when she did, I could hardly believe it. I didn't want to believe it. It was a lie! It had to be! Why couldn't I have known it was him before?
I remembered how happy she was.
“Oh, Teito! I’m so happy!”
And Teito... it didn’t make sense.
I felt my heart pounding, my hands shaking. A Mothers screaming, yelling, and everyone gasping.
He’s falling. He’s falling. He’s falling. He’s falling. He’s falling. He’s falling.
Sorry it takes me a while to update guys *O*
I remembered most of all; how my eyes stung after the breakup. We didn't last that long, just a couple of weeks. Noa and I. But I tried to stay strong, I really did. And I really didn't want to. All that ever entered my mind were the constant word, Why?
It was just like any other morning, I walked into the classroom we were in together, but he wasn't there. But there was something on my desk. A Striped Carnation, and a card.
“I’ve just been informed of the meaning of this Striped Carnation. You should look it up.”
- Your Ex Boyfriend, Noa
That was his handwriting and everything... I stared so long at that piece of paper, re-reading every single word until it made sense to me.
The small cubicle of the room seemed to suffocate me in, the walls seemed closer... and I felt so confused. What did the Striped Carnation represent? It felt like a bad omen to me at the time, and I was just too young to get my heart broken so fast.
I didn’t really have any friends to help me through this... all I kept holding onto that night close to my chest was: N’s card.
I made friends with him, didn’t I?
I wanted to see him again.
I wanted to talk to him on the phone, his number was on the card.
I wanted to go back to the place where I first met him and talk some more.
I missed him?
On a nice sunny day, I asked my parents to take me to that same park. They didn’t ask why; they just smiled. My Mom always knew if something was bothering me, but she didn't push it.
We arrived at the park ten minutes later, and I found ‘N’ seated at the same bench I had seen his parents with that one day. “Is he a friend of yours?”
My mother had asked, bending down to meet my face, she patted me on the head and smiled. “As long as you’re happy, I’m happy.” She had always whispered to me in my ear. And this time was no different.
“Yes. He’s my friend.”
My parents watched me run up to the boy I had no idea I would hate so much in the future - and I sat next to him, too scared to come close to him. I was still so shy after Noa.
“So, things didn’t work out.”
I shook my head.
It all happened too fast, like a blow of wind. A blow of wind that flew me across the air, and somehow managed to catch Teito, with only a few scrapes and bruises in the aftermath. I was relieved, I felt thankful toward God. But this all seemed so surreal- which was exactly what made me a hero today.
I didn't even feel like that was me in my own body, I hardly deserved a red cape, or this commotion surrounding the both of us. But maybe this would make people respect me more around here; just maybe.
I tried to say something to him, he was slowly moving and rubbing his muscles, his Mom next to him, but he payed her no attention. It took moments for my voice to come out, “A-Are you okay...?” I looked at him closely, he seemed mad... outraged. In his face, not paying attention at his wounds at all. I tried to open my mouth, but he spoke over me.
“Why did you have to save me!? I didn’t ask for you to save me!”
He ran off then, just ran off without even a thanks. His mom followed screaming his name.
I was dead speechless, the world around me seemed to suffocate me in those words, I didn’t ask for your help.
I clutched at my head, which seemed to give me a headache in return. “I just... I just wanted to help....” I heard myself mumble morbidly, at some point, I think my eyes almost started watering. But when I looked up to look around me, everyone was smiling, holding their outstretched hands to me.
I gazed at one in particular, gazing hard at his hand. “Now it’s my turn to tell you to stand up.” he was smiling like an angel to me.
I felt a small smile form in my lips, I took his hand, and stood next to Hato and everyone else, who cheered me on.
“Umm, Hato... you can let go of my hand now...”
“Oh, right... s-sorry.”