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Feeling Inferior to Younger Siblings?
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Posted 6/30/12

iLoveBoobies wrote:

Do you have younger siblings?

If you do, do you ever get the feeling that you are somehow inferior to him or her? by inferior I'm talking about loosing to him or her at certain things such as academics, sports, popularity, and such.

I have a younger brother and let me tell you, I HATE him. Well I don't really hate him but I'm Incredibly JEALOUS of him.

Here is a quick description of my younger brother:
Smart: Got straight A's in every subject ever since 3rd grade. Got a 4.3 GPA on his last report card.
Tall: I am 5 feet 8inches tall, and my younger brother is 6 feet tall. (I wish it was the opposite).
Popularity: Let me just say that he has more friends in his Freshman year of high school than I do in my entire life.
Studious: He studies like a nut job. In fact, he's studying right now as I'm writing this post. His GPA proves it.
Humorous: Whenever we have a conversation, I'm always the one laughing.
And so much more that I'm having trouble putting down on words.

The point is, I want to be like him!!! He is like the opposite of me WITH the exception of looks, because I do think I look a little bit better than him . (conceited much? Hell NAW.)

I don't know, but I get really annoyed when he's doing his homework and studying and all I can do is go on CR and rant about it. Have you watched the new anime called Space Brothers? If yes, then you must have heard this quote: "An Older Brother Must Always Stay Ahead of His Younger Siblings" Maybe not word for word but you get the idea. The older child should always be the perfect child But not in this case I suppose.

Sometimes I just wish I was the younger brother. =P



HAHA! XD ok, just think that your little brother is Alphonse and you're Edward Elric ;D (FMAB) lol... Anyways, from my point of view, maybe the others already said this to you, you are you... And maybe, you haven't noticed, but I'm sure you have special traits your bro doesn't have (if you not know them yet, do some brainstorming, find them and then, work them out!). In my case, my bro is taller than me too, we have the same amount of friends, but in my case... I'm a bit introvert :3, also, about school... both we have good grades, the only difference is that I was good (in my times from highschool) in subjects like Science and Biology and well, he is quite the opposite to me, because he likes math :3 (I guess that's why I'm a med student lol ). Anyways, I know you got the point xD, don't be jealous and just be proud of your bro, do not think that way, and don't care what others think about you because in the end, whenever you need help, your bro will be there for you and vice versa.
P.S. Sorry for my bad english xD.
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24 / F / Behind You
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Posted 7/1/12
my little sister is 17 and shes taller than me, smarter than me, has more friends than me, and is outgoing like i wish i was. so I'm not going to lie over the years i might have possible built up a little resentment towards her. but unlike her i now how to hide my feelings so if you asked my family about it they would have no clue how i feel. i hate that i feel this way but as the older sibling you just feel like your suppose to be better than the younger sibling so they can look up to you not the other way around.
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Posted 7/1/12

negan wrote:

"Hard work overcomes anything", only works in shonen anime. His brother has what we call talent. Although, I'm sure your definition of talent is different than mine so I insist in not turning this into an argument.


Even if his brother has "talent" (whatever that means), are you saying he should just accept that his brother is better than him and those are the cards he was dealt? You make me sad...
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Posted 7/1/12 , edited 7/1/12
Why is it that almost all the youngest children have to be the studious type. I'm the youngest among our siblings and I say I'm the only one among them who takes studying so seriously. Actually, my older sister has an inferior complex towards me but I always told her not to be because there are a lot of things that she is good at. I always make her see and realize what those good points are.
Posted 7/1/12 , edited 7/1/12

jujukid wrote:

Even if his brother has "talent" (whatever that means), are you saying he should just accept that his brother is better than him and those are the cards he was dealt? You make me sad...


Hard work won't simply fix everything miraculously like you seem to be claiming. His brother already has two head starts, one being time itself, and the other is his talent. Talent being the ability to enjoy and make certain tasks just flow, like studying. If he decides to start studying and changing himself to turn into the equivalent of his brother, he's likely to be his brother's shadow his entire life. Which ultimately is a sad life (and if I were in his shoes, I'd rather make you sad now than spend my life in a miserable manner). Unfortunately for him, the best he can do in this situation is to take a lead of his own life, become independent, and move away from everything that's dragging him down and build a happy life on his own. If there's one thing that we all have trouble creating regardless of intelligence, that's a happy life. At that moment, he'll truly not give a single fuck about his brother's life anymore.
Of course there are plenty of paths, like the one you suggested. But in that case he should prepare himself to be a shadow for a very very long time to come.

A short answer would be yes, he should accept that his brother is better, and focus on his own life. There's always someone better out there, he was just unlucky to have a someone that close by.
Posted 7/1/12
Its the reverse opposite im the youngest and I feel inferior to my older brother =/
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Posted 7/1/12 , edited 7/1/12

iLoveBoobies wrote:




Well your certainly not more mature, coming in here and ranting about him....

Being good at school, being tall and being innovative with jokes isn't what determine your worth as a human.
Those things exist in some people and dont exist in others! they cant be the criteria for determining who's best.
What determines it is something else, something that exist in all human and all human are capable of doing, except they dont...



scent08 wrote:

Why is it that almost all the youngest children have to be the studious type. I'm the youngest among our siblings and I say I'm the only one among them who takes studying so seriously. Actually, my older sister has an inferior complex towards me but I always told her not to be because there are a lot of things that she is good at. I always make her see and realize what those good points are.


It's because we have more responsibility, we know better.....
we see the mistakes they made/make in life and we're obliged to do the right thing.
we know we should be serious about study when they're okay about taking it easy
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Posted 7/1/12
Well... I'm the oldest and I don't want to be conceited but I am smarter, more popular, and better looking than my siblings. It's really not as great as you'd think. My brother blamed me for his "chronic depression" and it kind of made me feel bad knowing that no matter how hard my brother tries and no matter how long he studies, I can master same material in a fraction of the time and without as much effort. I'd much rather my siblings be successful. Unless you have a severe disability that prevents you from being smart, popular, etc., you should put effort into bettering yourself rather than being jealous.
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Posted 7/1/12

negan wrote:

Hard work won't simply fix everything miraculously like you seem to be claiming. His brother already has two head starts, one being time itself, and the other is his talent. Talent being the ability to enjoy and make certain tasks just flow, like studying. If he decides to start studying and changing himself to turn into the equivalent of his brother, he's likely to be his brother's shadow his entire life. Which ultimately is a sad life (and if I were in his shoes, I'd rather make you sad now than spend my life in a miserable manner). Unfortunately for him, the best he can do in this situation is to take a lead of his own life, become independent, and move away from everything that's dragging him down and build a happy life on his own. If there's one thing that we all have trouble creating regardless of intelligence, that's a happy life. At that moment, he'll truly not give a single fuck about his brother's life anymore.
Of course there are plenty of paths, like the one you suggested. But in that case he should prepare himself to be a shadow for a very very long time to come.

A short answer would be yes, he should accept that his brother is better, and focus on his own life. There's always someone better out there, he was just unlucky to have a someone that close by.


When did I say he should turn into his brother? He said that he wanted to be better at school and stuff like his brother. Hes never going to be his brother but he could still be better than him. I'm not sure why trying to improve yourself means having a depressing life. It sounds like you want him to run away from everything that makes him sad instead of facing it. That's pretty sick. :(

What I'm trying to say is that he should focus on his own life. He wants to be better at certain things so he should focus on improving them. There's nothing miserable about working towards a goal. It can even be fun a lot of the time.
Posted 7/1/12 , edited 7/1/12

jujukid wrote:

I'm not sure why trying to improve yourself means having a depressing life. It sounds like you want him to run away from everything that makes him sad instead of facing it. That's pretty sick. :(


You're very quickly at accusing me. How about acting your age for once?

Everyone should aim for self improvement. In fact, even if we don't want, we're always doing it. What's wrong and sad is to do it with the purpose of being better than someone else. People should become better for themselves first, this is the part where selfishness is actually good, and you'll be required to present plenty of it if you ever get in a romantic relationship. You didn't tell him to become his brother, you told him to live as a shadow.
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Posted 7/1/12

negan wrote:

You're very quickly at accusing me. How about acting your age for once?

Everyone should aim for self improvement. In fact, even if we don't want, we're always doing it. What's wrong and sad is to do it with the purpose of being better than someone else. People should become better for themselves first, this is the part where selfishness is actually good, and you'll be required to present plenty of it if you ever get in a romantic relationship. You didn't tell him to become his brother, you told him to live as a shadow.


Whats wrong with becoming better at something than someone else? I am not even sure why we are arguing. My original point is that instead of being jealous of someone and accepting life, go improve yourself. And try to have fun with it.
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36 / M / The Void.
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Posted 7/1/12
I don't feel like that anymore. They feel like my equals.
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27 / M / Somewhere
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Posted 7/1/12
me too have a younger brother... he has a skill or pluses that I dont... but I have a plus that he dont... so If I feel jealous of him then I just take it out by doing anything I like.. like this one...

No humans are perfect, so we just help each other to overcome our imperfect
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Posted 7/1/12
my brother is 2 years younger than me. hes an idiot but he thinks he knows everything. but im jealous of him because he has owned several cars while i havent owned a single car and he has moved out before me. I have moved out but that was for a limited time for a job. he also has a girlfriend which he intends to marry while iv never had a boyfriend, iv never kissed and im a virgin. some of the things hes done he was stupid to do, such as buying cars and moving out. his first car he got before he could drive and he had to sell it anyway. he buys crappy cheap cars that he cant afford and break down. im trying to save for a nice car. He moved out but because he couldnt really afford it in the first place my mom has been paying for most of his rent which isnt fair. we only hear from him now if he needs money. i hate him but im still jealous cause hes growing up and im going no where.
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Posted 7/1/12

brrooEy wrote:


scent08 wrote:

Why is it that almost all the youngest children have to be the studious type. I'm the youngest among our siblings and I say I'm the only one among them who takes studying so seriously. Actually, my older sister has an inferior complex towards me but I always told her not to be because there are a lot of things that she is good at. I always make her see and realize what those good points are.


It's because we have more responsibility, we know better.....
we see the mistakes they made/make in life and we're obliged to do the right thing.
we know we should be serious about study when they're okay about taking it easy


Hahahahahahaha!!!

I'm sorry, but when I think about myself and my younger brother in relation to THAT sentiment, I just had to laugh XD

I have to say, I think my family is backwards. I'm the oldest and my brother always seems to be jealous of me or to hate me for no reason. Not to be mean or anything, but I am more responsible than he is, I take the blame for a lot of things he screws up and I make sure to keep myself in check. I keep my grades up (though I will admit I am not "studious" -- never study a day in my life) while my brother consistently fails classes, gets into fights at school, disrespects authority, ect. He had to go to anger management classes once! I worry about him. He's going into high school next year, and if he keeps up that attitude I think he'll be there for more than four years...

As to other aspects, well, of course my bro is a lot taller than me. But he's freakishly tall! He hit six feet when he was 13! And I think we have about the same popularity level. My bro is a bit more "social" than I am (he plays sports and is always out of the house with friends), but I think I have a bit more likable personality Once again, I'm not trying to be mean! Just honest! I also have a way better sense of humor, I think. But that isn't a fair comparison -- everyone has different tastes for humor.

Anyway, it doesn't matter how you compare to your siblings. You shouldn't really compare at all! Different people will have different specialties and things they excel at -- for example, my brother is a lot better than me at sports, at video games, he's stronger than me, he's more assertive than me, he's definitely not afraid to speak his mind like I can be. Instead of competing, you should try to look more at your own good points instead of your sibling's. At the end of the day, they're still your still family and you love them
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