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Post Reply Can men and women be "just friends"?
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Posted 3/27/13

scottRabara wrote:

I've gone back and forth on this with a couple of my friends and to the irony of my own thoughts and philosophy on the topic, the majority of people that I have spoken with happen to women.

But I feel that women and men can't be "just friends". Close friendships between women and men always have one end wanting more than just friendship whether it be hidden or known. My explanation for the men-women friendships that are strictly platonic is that one point in time one of them had an attraction for each other and by attraction I mean physical or emotional.

I bring this up solely because I'm kind of in this situation that has been happening for more than 3 months.. To put it bluntly: I'm interested in this girl that has a boyfriend. How we became close is both of our faults because we are past the level of "just friends." She refers to me as her best friend, but we both know deep down that we're both attracted to each other. And now that her boyfriend is back in town (he went 3 hours north for college and had been gone for 9 months. So the last 3 months he was gone, that when me and her had met and started getting to know each other) I haven't talked to her since.

The friendship started out as a friendship, but as we spent more time together and got to know each other and eventually, let each other gravitate towards one another things got out of hand. And now.. I believe that I can't be her friend anymore solely because I believe that women and men can't be "just friends." And it sucks because she was my best friend.

But enough about that, what do you guys think on the topic? I'm interested in what everyone has to say.


yea, and? Of course they can. I'm not going to give you my long philosophy doctrine on this, but I will tell you it's completely possible.
And what does it matter if you want more? Having more means nothing. You should be happy with what you have now and be content with that.
If later on things change course and you guys want to be in a relationship then buy gum, go do it!

You know what they say right? The best marriages are when the husband and wife are best friends.
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27 / M / Toledo
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Posted 3/27/13
I get along with females more than I do males and there isn't always attraction there beyond simple friendship so I would say yes.
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19 / F
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Posted 3/27/13
I've known one of my friends since first grade. We're seniors now.
Never been anything weird between us, even as we got older.
We're great friends, live near each other, always chill.
So yeah, I suppose they can be.
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Posted 4/6/13
There is most likely to be some attraction between the two, whether one-sided or not but yes, there can be just friendship. That is, if you're over the age of 20 and your mind isn't always thinking about sex and love.
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Posted 4/6/13
That's totally possible.

I've had/have quite a bit of female friends. I can't say I've ever had a "crush" on most of them. And they were really good friends, so I think it would be possible.

Pheromones don't make you attracted to every female in existence, and vice versa.
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Posted 4/6/13
Sometimes..but it rarely works.
Posted 4/6/13
one person wants more and ruins the vibe with inappropriate behavior the type dripping with desperation which is both irritating and selfishly designed to be noticed
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102 / M / The Milky Way Galaxy
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Posted 4/6/13 , edited 4/6/13
It's possible, but most of the time it doesn't work out. There are usually some feelings involved and the friendship will either advance to a relationship or fall apart because of them.
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20 / F / Planet Earth
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Posted 4/6/13
I dont see why not, I have had quite a few male friends
Posted 4/6/13
Yes, it's possible. I have gay and straight male friends.
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16 / F / BC Canada
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Posted 4/6/13
Yes I think they can, as long as they behave in a way that is friendly only and not flirting with each other they can be ...
Posted 4/6/13
Sometimes... It depends. Just don't fall in love I guess.
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20 / F / Philippines
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Posted 4/10/13
COME ON. Of course men and women can be just friends. It's people's problems if they put malice in the friendship.

But in the case of broken-up couples, I still think they can be friends depending on the situation.
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23 / M / Maryland
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Posted 4/12/13
Yes its possible but if you get too close the temptation to see if youd work as more thsn friends gets too strong and kills things.
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23 / F / Sexual Chocolate
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Posted 4/12/13
Most of my friends are guys, but i'm sure some people would assume that's cheating in my case. I'm friends with other homosexual women as well, some of them share a mutual attraction with me, we choose not to act on that though because it'd mess up a number of things not the least of which being our friendship.
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18 / F / Amsterdam, The Ne...
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Posted 4/21/13
Most of my friends are men, and that's fine with me because girls.... Well, for example:

If you're irritated by your male friend you can just say 'Dude you're such an ass...' and they'll be like :' lol, ok.' And you can get on.
With girls you can't say that because they'll f**king nag about what you've said and fight with you untill it's okay with them, three years later when you fight again they will bring it up again.
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