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What if women went up to guys they liked rather than waiting to get asked out?
Posted 7/18/12

marcel20 wrote:


negan wrote:


marcel20 wrote:


Flamzeron wrote:

If more girls took the initiative it would make things easier on the guys.


I agree...maybe not all the time, but just a little more would help alot.


Help you get laid?


LoL no...wow you really got me really laughing out loud .....well it might end up being part of it. Ya know when things work out well...it happens, but it isn't the only thing...plus i'm the relationship and progressing to marriage type.


Smoove... (for when the response is too epic that 'Smooth' just isnt' enough)
Posted 7/18/12

perotin9 wrote:

Would help me a lot. I can tell when a girl is flirting with some guy, but there have been many instances where someone was flirting with me but I was totally not getting the clue. There was this one time however where the girl made it very obvious but I was in a position where it was VERY inappropriate for me to proceed.


that happen to me once this woman was flirting with me like 100% FLIRTING!! with her husband next to her at my job...I wanted to disappear so bad that day.
Posted 7/18/12

marcel20 wrote:

LoL no...wow you really got me really laughing out loud .....well it might end up being part of it. Ya know when things work out well...it happens, but it isn't the only thing...plus i'm the relationship and progressing to marriage type.


So, would you cheat on her if a cute little Asian girl was all over you?
Posted 7/18/12 , edited 7/18/12

DangerousYams wrote:


marcel20 wrote:


negan wrote:


marcel20 wrote:


Flamzeron wrote:

If more girls took the initiative it would make things easier on the guys.


I agree...maybe not all the time, but just a little more would help alot.


Help you get laid?


LoL no...wow you really got me really laughing out loud .....well it might end up being part of it. Ya know when things work out well...it happens, but it isn't the only thing...plus i'm the relationship and progressing to marriage type.


Smoove... (for when the response is too epic that 'Smooth' just isnt' enough)


The sad thing is that I was being honest Ive had plenty of opportunity to mess with alot of girls, but I grew up very strict and conservative so that I'm not interested in messing with women I don't know very very well, so I end up being a tease most the time because my personality doesn't match the way I look.
Posted 7/18/12

negan wrote:


marcel20 wrote:

LoL no...wow you really got me really laughing out loud .....well it might end up being part of it. Ya know when things work out well...it happens, but it isn't the only thing...plus i'm the relationship and progressing to marriage type.


So, would you cheat on her if a cute little Asian girl was all over you?


no, once I have a girlfriend....all doors are closed for me...I grew up with a distinct respect for marriage that no amount of alcohol, nor how hot the girl was would make me cheat and that's 100% honesty the thing is me picking the right one that wont cheat on me.
Posted 7/18/12

MissTayee wrote:

Ya I just did that. Ya.... that didn't turn out so great. He wasn't looking for a relationship. Oh well. At least we're still friends.


Darn I wish it worked out. I like your round about response about it all...you deserve a great guy plus you have good confidence in yourself to do something like that. Kudos
Posted 7/18/12

kajisawa wrote:


Men are like that totally have a self gratifying ego when you asked them they seems to view you as nah your so easy and if you do not mind them if they hit on you or court you they will most probably said your playing hard to get. geee well findings suggest that men only like it when you approached them if they like have a feeling for you also or they think you look hot and pretty besides that the hell with them hey they are men, things that will not kill them will only make them MORE MEN so let them try or die hard approaching us girls. Us female will just play it cool and believe me it feels good when a man ask you out and court you specially if he is sincere and not some one hit wonder boom i out here after like i got what i want player type


Yes your right it does feel good when were approached by women...mostly because its not too common and it does boost our ego when it happens, but like you said you like the feeling of men approaching you..you are a very cute woman, so i' m sure a lot of guys hit on you all the time. Isn't it OK for us guys to feel that just once in a blue moon? not every day or month for that matter, but just once in a while. If I ever met you and you asked me out I'd say yes, not only because your attractive, but also while on a date I can find out what your really about and if your some one that can draw my interest past your looks. Also if we met and I asked you out...when you seen me face to face you would feel nothing but sincerity.
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Posted 7/18/12

marcel20 wrote:


Catz1297 wrote:

My pride keeps me from doing that. For 3 freaking years I've been contemplating whether I should tell him or not since the guy I like is excessively shy when it comes to this stuff, but in the end, I've decided to keep on waiting.

Plus I'm scared he'll reject me. I've invited him to events with friends a few times in the past but he's always said he's busy... so I'm pretty sure that's a sign that he's not interested, but then again his friends and mine are not the same so he might feel uncomfortable (yes, I'm making an excuse for myself) <=== so shouldn't that indicate that I'm "going up" to him?


BUT....
I've always wanted a romantic "will you be my girlfriend" proposal... but I think that'll never happen :(

I think that girls won't ask the guy out 1) because of their fantasies and 2) because we're a lot more cautious... we think more... so there's always the possibility of him rejecting you and the world finds out, everyone laughing at you... etc...

A missed chance is a missed chance, that is FATE. But a ruined reputation is your near future. You can't mess up that.


wow three years...you are very patient . I hope when you actually ask him that it works out for you.


IF I ask him. Which I probably won't. I need a guy that would take the initiative~
Posted 7/18/12 , edited 7/19/12

Kira0309 wrote:

that is the problem with men these days, they are all wussy cowards that dont know how to man up and grow some balls. Most women dont want a guy that wont take the lead. If your not man enough to go after the women you like then your not worth the effort no matter how much we like you.



Say what? You are aware a lot of guys receive rejections in front of their friends and rivals in pretty much every occasion prior to college, right? With that said, it's not simply about growing balls; its about saving frickin' face when getting turned down. Let's think: you qualify for a driver's permit at age 16. Thus the soonest you're ever able to arrange for a private date that you don't have to get driven to by friends or family you're still in high school. Unless your next door neighbors, logically this dictates a proximity issue in which case you have school, after school job or club (if you share something mutually) or club/school trips or the walk home. That's not a lot of options for privacy. In this day and age, I suppose you could text, facebook, twitter, skype, Cisco Telecommute or e-card your intentions to your object of affection but I've not really seen that go over well in quite a few personal experiences. Women relish face to face contact. Maybe not all but certainly very many do.

Additionally, sticking with the high school scenario, unless the guy's preferred girl is a complete loner she's normally surrounded by her girlfriends at 90% of all the times he's bound to see her except, MAYBE between classes or on the walk home. That is a massive compounding factor, because technically you aren't just seeking the approval of the girl. You're seeking the approval of the girl and ALL HER FRIENDS. If even one of them doesn't like you, its' bound to go south in a hurry. This is true even in later years at clubs, bars (it's girls night... excuse) parties what have you. Next, guys will sometimes resort to idiotic moves we think look cool either during or before we ask you out a lot of times not for your sake so you think we're totally awesome and the job is in the bag but for our sake so we don't bitch out in the first place. Everything from drag races, to cranking iron, or slamming down 3-6 shots of liquid courage if your drinking age, anything to ignite or squeeze out every last ounce of testosterone to just get the job done. Which, as many women testify actually amounts to us shooting ourselves in the foot.

Last, approaching a woman for most men seems like a simple formula. Find girl, lock eyes, smile, approach DIRECTLY. You know what that definitive drive says to the rest of the room once he gets off his ass and takes the first 3 steps? "Man making a move, let's watch for the flames... " and suddenly every damn pair of eyes in 20 feet is now glued to the most interesting event of the last 10 seconds. Most important of those courage sucking tractor beams homed in on your every move is literally, any other guy who is interested since the natural response by rivals is to turn your eyes into laser beams and look for signs of weakness. It may seem like nothing to you since you literally hold all the power as to how the whole event turns out and no one thinks less of you or thinks you're a chump or a loser if the guy that asks you out is shot down. But for the one putting himself in front of not just you but anyone and everyone in the vicinity's direct line of fire, it's not simply about being a man, it's much more like the scenario: Death... or Cake? (and occasionally we end up being the guy that gets told...) Sorry-- we're all out of cake. So I'm going to part with a fun analogy and a serious plea: instead of sitting around like a princess waiting for your knight in shining armor to notice you locked away in one of the hundred thousand damn towers in the land all with princesses' waiting for the same thing, why not give us a break and be the one princess to let the rope ladder down? It would be a welcome change to battling the dragon, scaling the ruins and climbing the 100 flights of stone steps worn smooth with age...

Just sayin'


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Posted 7/19/12
I like the points DangerousYams brought up. I can relate.

I may look pretty calm and collected approaching cute women at a bar or nightclub, but even with a lot of practice it's never truly an "easy" experience. I still get the "jitters" from nervousness, and sometimes a bit self-conscious and insecure.

"Is she going to be receptive to my advance?"

"Is she going to like my jokes?"

"Are her friends going to make it difficult for me?"

"What if some better-looking guy interrupts midway and cock blocks me?

etc. etc.
Posted 7/19/12
There was this guy I really liked at my job and I gave him my number out right after we had been talking for a few days. I told him to text me sometime and we'd hang out. Two days later I asked him to the movies. He ended up telling me he really liked me the night we went out, but some things happened T__T and I guess it just wasnt meant to be.

A while ago I let a good guy slip away by waiting around for him to do everything and he eventually got with someone else. It makes sense and its not fair for the guy. So I made sure I at least put forth more of an effort with this last guy. Now I'm not stuck with that gross, "what if" feeling. lol
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Posted 7/19/12 , edited 7/19/12

marcel20 wrote:


MissTayee wrote:

Ya I just did that. Ya.... that didn't turn out so great. He wasn't looking for a relationship. Oh well. At least we're still friends.


Darn I wish it worked out. I like your round about response about it all...you deserve a great guy plus you have good confidence in yourself to do something like that. Kudos


Later I realized I really didn't like him all that much. In a romantic way. Plus he was 18. I think I'll stick to older guys xD. But at the same time I've asked other guys out. A few guys I dated as well were ones that I asked. I'm too impatient to wait for them to ask.
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Posted 7/19/12
i have had that happen to me a few times where i had lied a girl and i was ganna ask her out and she beat me to the punch
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Posted 7/19/12

SlimShadyDogg wrote:

Oh how i wish girls would do this. Im 18 and still cant properly ask out a girl. I even have a hard time talking to them unless we're friends (which is hard because you have to talk to them to become friends, then you get friend zoned).
Im kind of the shy type so it really sucks







Tell me about it...
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Posted 7/19/12
Yea, I asked a guy out once and got rejected in the face.

I felt absolutely crappy and told myself that I'm just gonna wait next time.
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