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WOMEN AND GIRLS why are you so hard on your self when it comes to the way you view your body?
Posted 9/10/12 , edited 9/10/12

a619ko wrote:

Straight up...

I care a lot about how I look and about how people around me look. I keep my self fit and healthy.

I'm not going to lie and say sugarcoated things such as...

"Oh, you shouldn't put so much make up on, you're beautiful with out it"
or "Oh, don't lose weight, you already look nice how you are."
Because I'd be lying.

I know it's coming off wrong, but this is just the 'light stuff'. And I don't want to get deep,tbh it's just, I'm a lust(sex)crazed male close to my 20's and I could honestly care less about your "inner" beauty then how "hot" you are on the outside.



Maybe it's due to my age...Maybe I'll grow out of it and find my self a nice girl to be with. Someday, not today though, nor tomorrow...I'm just going to enjoy my life as a young stud and get the addiction out of my system. Otherwise I'd end up having a mid life crisis later.



Thank you for your honesty, but even though you think this way does not mean we all think that way.
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Posted 9/11/12

a619ko wrote:

Straight up...

I care a lot about how I look and about how people around me look. I keep my self fit and healthy.

I'm not going to lie and say sugarcoated things such as...

"Oh, you shouldn't put so much make up on, you're beautiful with out it"
or "Oh, don't lose weight, you already look nice how you are."
Because I'd be lying.

I know it's coming off wrong, but this is just the 'light stuff'. And I don't want to get deep,tbh it's just, I'm a lust(sex)crazed male close to my 20's and I could honestly care less about your "inner" beauty then how "hot" you are on the outside.



Maybe it's due to my age...Maybe I'll grow out of it and find my self a nice girl to be with. Someday, not today though, nor tomorrow...I'm just going to enjoy my life as a young stud and get the addiction out of my system. Otherwise I'd end up having a mid life crisis later.



I would prefer a person who was honest with me than one who lied simply because they didn't want to hurt my feelings. I think it's how tactfully you can say such things that really makes a difference.
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23 / F / United States
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Posted 9/11/12 , edited 9/11/12
Because standards are high, humanity is shallow, and competing with the glossy photo shopped centerfolds of your average magazine is a bitch.

Also if you don't like the way you look, that's on you and you should either accept the way you are or change it. For instance I haven't been feeling like my tone, sexy self lately so I decided to go vegetarian and hit the stair stepper. Ladies lets face it we all feel better when we don't have to do the "duck hobble" to get into our skinny jeans and unless you have the metabolism of Micheal Phelps your going to have to put forth a little effort into watching what you eat and moving your ass off the couch. It's really that simple.

As far as image issues outside weight concerns sometimes the universe kicks our asses with genetic deformities. Big ears, Big noses, man chins, acne, crooked teeth, one breast bigger than the other what have you it all boils down to the same thing. Not everyone can be a supermodel no matter how hard you try. So you can either hide your flaws under pounds of makeup, hair dye, and uncomfortable clothes or you can grow some balls and work with what you have.

Amen.
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Posted 9/11/12

magicuser360 wrote:


marcel20 wrote:

As a guy I see women on tv shows, in real life and even on crunchyroll forum post saying how their too tall or short, or hate their legs, thighs, feet, hips and the list goes on and on down to every last deatailed part of their body's. I was dating a girl who was a model, nothing wrong with her at all from where I was looking, but she told me that she is ashamed of her toes and I asked why and she replied "their too fat" and no matter what I said she still thought that her toes were fat and they realy realy weren't .

Ladies no matter how you think you look a guy will find something sexy about you and THATS IS ALL THAT WE NEED to be attracted to you....I know media and magizines hold you to unfair standards of Beauty, but if guys were held to such a thing the magizine company's and media wouldn't make any money due to the fact that we don't realy give a damn what they think so why can't it be that way for you?,even if we tell you your beautiful?? I am in no way trying to beat you down, but I just want you to know that every one of you are beautiful in some way to some guy....and that he will be happy with just you and all of you even your so-called fat toes so believe in YOUR own beauty and back it up with confidence :)


Where on earth do guys like you LIVE?

But hey...People should love themselves for all they are and aren't; and people should love others for who they are, not who they want them to be.


oh we are here, and i agree with the OP i have meet women who really seem to want to drive not only themself nuts but me as well, i just usually, if a woman says "I'm i heavy" I simile and say "yes" then she gets mad and pulls away but i stop her and simile "Yet right now the weight of one person is all i need." Another one "Is my but fat?" I will simile and say "yes" Then she get mad at me, then i smack it and say "but that why i like it"

Really Magicuser is just how you word it, because in this day and age it really hard for a woman to well be a woman without feeling insecure same goes for men as well.

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19 / F / Texas
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Posted 9/11/12
Yeah sometimes we get carried away and want to look perfect, but I can say from experience that having this attitude can only end up ruining you.

My first relationship was with this really handsome guy who I enjoyed being with. He even introduced me to his parents saying, "Didn't I tell you she'd be pretty." When he said that I wanted to run away. I hated myself back then I was so insecure that afterwards I wanted to break up thinking that he must be planning something, or that he was laughing at me on the inside. So I broke up with him and I haven't tried another relationship since. I was so paranoid it was just disturbing. Not only did I ruin myself, but who knows how he is doing right now. I pray everyday that he is with another girl and that he's happy.

I learned afterwards that there needs to be a balance. Being obsessed with our looks is almost like an addiction. You just want to fix everything and be something we're not, but it's always enough. Just putting in the work and time from being careful to what you eat and taking that 30 minute walk everyday is okay. As girls it's probably tougher since to look our best we sometimes have to put money from getting our hair done every month to paying for body hair removal. As Kyandy mentioned there is a lot more work done behind the scenes to look what guys consider natural and beautiful.

Although I learned this after I was home schooled. Some guys can be cruel and really make a girl feel ugly, and I think it's such a huge disadvantage nice guys have. Most of my friends have already branded all men to be jackasses only looking for sex, and all it took was one rotten guy to do that. So thanks for those kind words marcel20. I hope your message can get across to those that read it. I know it did to me.
Posted 9/11/12

crazyfirefly wrote:

Because standards are high, humanity is shallow, and competing with the glossy photo shopped centerfolds of your average magazine is a bitch.

Also if you don't like the way you look, that's on you and you should either accept the way you are or change it. For instance I haven't been feeling like my tone, sexy self lately so I decided to go vegetarian and hit the stair stepper. Ladies lets face it we all feel better when we don't have to do the "duck hobble" to get into our skinny jeans and unless you have the metabolism of Micheal Phelps your going to have to put forth a little effort into watching what you eat and moving your ass off the couch. It's really that simple.

As far as image issues outside weight concerns sometimes the universe kicks our asses with genetic deformities. Big ears, Big noses, man chins, acne, crooked teeth, one breast bigger than the other what have you it all boils down to the same thing. Not everyone can be a supermodel no matter how hard you try. So you can either hide your flaws under pounds of makeup, hair dye, and uncomfortable clothes or you can grow some balls and work with what you have.

Amen.


Amen indeed.
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24 / M / England
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Posted 9/11/12
Beauty products etc make money on people's misery creating something that simply doesn't work

People both men and women need to love themselves for who they are not hate themselves because of something designed to make you insecure.

The company Dove did an advert for UK tv stating something about many young girls feel insecure for their own body and then shown the audience a product that will take it all away.
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33 / F / North Pole
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Posted 9/11/12
It's normal to be hard about self tor women...

Here's my 2 cents.
I'm 30, I have lots of younger girl friends, so when i go out with them, of course the guys will hit on them.
I'm chubby, no1 likes chubby chix! They all go for thin tall girls (if i was a guy Id do that too).
My legs are short and not pretty... So wearing a dress, i look like a potato sack, pretty funky!
My nose is huge, like I could be Pinocchio's sister.... How can I be happy with that on my face?
My hips are large (and i don't mean fat, it's really the bone's structure) Its like 2x timers Jennifer Lopez's ass!

I could go on and on like this.
I do exercises, i keep a smile on even if i'm dyin inside.

So you cannot expect someone who isn't spoiled physically by life to be happy about how she is...
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Posted 9/11/12

VanillePink wrote:

i keep a smile on even if i'm dyin inside.


I've been there before.
Posted 9/11/12 , edited 10/5/12

VanillePink wrote:

It's normal to be hard about self tor women...

Here's my 2 cents.
I'm 30, I have lots of younger girl friends, so when i go out with them, of course the guys will hit on them.
I'm chubby, no1 likes chubby chix! They all go for thin tall girls (if i was a guy Id do that too).
My legs are short and not pretty... So wearing a dress, i look like a potato sack, pretty funky!
My nose is huge, like I could be Pinocchio's sister.... How can I be happy with that on my face?
My hips are large (and i don't mean fat, it's really the bone's structure) Its like 2x timers Jennifer Lopez's ass!

I could go on and on like this.
I do exercises, i keep a smile on even if i'm dyin inside.

So you cannot expect someone who isn't spoiled physically by life to be happy about how she is...


The way I look totally at life is like this: what ever that is going to happen will happen in our lives even with change sometimes we end with the same outcomes...But we DO have a CHOICE on how we react to a situation, either you suffer the whole time through an ordeal or you make the best of what you have and ride it till the wheels fall off. I can guarantee you that making the best of it will make you alot happier person and at the end of the day you won't regret NOT taking a chance at it.Plus there are plenty of men who only love women who are chubby, haven't you heard of websites and dating services dedicated to this? Maybe you can go to other places without those group of friends SOMETIMES, finding the right one is sometimes like war...there may need to be strategy involved and there are plenty of men who would love jennifer Lopez times 2 . I don't have all the answers I agree, but I do know that every woman and man is desired by someone even if they don't believe it themselves it doesn't change the fact that its true.
Posted 10/2/12 , edited 10/5/12

Axerith wrote:

the dude says he dated a model, and he's talking about all women being beautiful. you don't think that's extremely hypocritical of you? go date the proverbial "beached whale" that is beautiful "on the inside" then come back and teach us a thing or two, kthxbye.


ummm... yea that's a childish argument....the point I was making is that she was a model, what others might call perfect, but yet she still was very insecure about her toes; it shows women who look at models as perfect that the "model woman" whom they seek to be, also has issues about her body("common ground"), and that they aren't soo different from what society would consider to be the unattractive woman.
Posted 10/2/12
I don't understand what you guys want girls to be like. It's who they are after all. Would you rather be stuck with a narcissist or a low self-esteemed girl? To me either way, she is still a person with emotions, so it doesn't matter.
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Posted 10/2/12
Girls don't need perfume in my opinion, actually I don't really even like the smell of most perfume... too strong..... If you want a man to salivate over you, don't smell like flowers, smell like BBQ!... though watch out for stray dogs then.....
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24 / F / Utah
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Posted 10/2/12
It's true, yesterday I heard a girl throwing up in the school's women's bathroom (it definitely sounded deliberate) and it just made me sad that people who feel they're fat/ugly need to resort to such measures just to feel loved/lovable. I mean I'm fat and I hate myself for it, but to feel it to that extreme that you harm yourself in such a way is very sad. I guess it's just the world we live in though.
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31 / F / U
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Posted 10/2/12
This pretty much sums up why right here
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