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Spreading the Hate
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19 / F / HK
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Posted 9/27/12
I don't know about you guys, but I have (shamefully) made some of my bestfriends by bonding with them while hating on someone else (I'm a bitch, I KNOW, but we had reasons).

But it's true people do stand together when hating on someone or something and thus, if done on a bigger scale, groups are made, things are done and all to express their hate. I mean, think about War. There is the initial uh, stimulus, propaganda from the government, and even if the mass does not agree with a war, there are always powerful individuals who take charge and get enough support to start a war. And if people are willing to fight to the death, they obviously believe in what they do. And when the war is over, the mass is happy and yay it's all fine and dandy.


I could totally go all philosophical right now, but I believe it has more to do with society than with human nature and all that good stuff.

My point is, that why do people do this? I do this, I'm just many of you people have (although you may not want to admit it or maybe you haven't noticed).
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21 / M / Australia
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Posted 9/27/12
So, you make hater friends? You can't make friends by talking about fashion or somethin?
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24 / M
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Posted 9/27/12

ahriinvision wrote:

Hate is just as much of a human emotion as Love...
If the theory of relativity is correct, then the equal and opposite reaction to Love is Hate
But in such a way that the opposite to Gravity is Lift, they both have the power to do the same thing.
They can bring people together and break them apart.

At least, that is what I believe..


wha....
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26 / M
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Posted 9/27/12
It's mob mentality or something. Everyone is mean anyways, it's just when other people are doing it you feel more ready to put your own hateful attitudes out there and make someone feel horrible. Making friends by doing this probably isn't the best idea, since those friends probably are jerks anyways and will gladly insult you behind your back when other people are doing it.
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17 / F / Australia
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Posted 9/27/12
What I guess I was trying to say is... Why only question why people make friends while hating?
Just as many people make friends with a common love.
By what definition do we decide Hate is the odd emotion to make friends from?
Granted they probably are not great friends, but still...
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27 / M / Indianapolis, Ind...
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Posted 9/27/12
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22 / M
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Posted 9/27/12 , edited 9/27/12
There's actually a very good, practical reason why such a great deal of bonding is done through the exclusion of another and it has to do with shared interests; ultimately, your only aim as a human being is to survive and to reproduce - the issue is that resources are limited so people have to form groups in order to secure these resources for themselves and their group as a whole. Those who fail to form groups tend to be at a huge disadvantage, not only socially but economically also. On a larger scale, multiple groups will often join together if it is to their mutual benefit etc. etc.

The importance of all this is in how these groups are held together; the individual finds a group to ensure his safety against everybody else, groups band together to ensure their safety against all the other groups or even go to war against another to eliminate a common threat. The point is that a necessary component of one group setting themselves up as the one or the object (it is impossible, given human perspicuity to imagine oneself as anything other than the object) is that everybody else becomes the other or the subject. Whether conscious or not, every identification you make with a group of people who share interest X sets you up against groups of people who share opposing interest Y. Talking about somebody you and another person have a common dislike for is no different from basically every other social interaction you've ever engaged in throughout your life, it just happens that sharing an active dislike for another individual or group helps you to bond fairly quickly because the instinct to group together to defend against threats is one that has been deeply entrenched within the human psyche as a result of natural selection because of how useful it is when responding to selection pressure.
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Posted 9/27/12
Why disliking the same things (Or people.) spells friendship?

A new study shows what teenage girls have known for decades–being mean can be a surefire way to make friends.
It may seem counterintuitive, but ask anyone who’s made it through high school and they’ll likely agree. A shared dislike of something — and especially of someone — is a great way to bond with a potential new friend.

People(Mainly girls.) readily connect when they have a third entity to jointly demean. This could be someone they both know or a random celebrity; even if the hatred isn’t strong, the kinship could be deep.

To be honest I have made some friends just because we hate someone, and that isn't something I'm proud about. Which is why I stopped trying to gain friends by doing that. I mean, there are other better methods on making friends.

For example :

Spend more time around people. Join an organization or club with people who have common interests(Other than hating on someone, if possible.). Make eye contact and smile. Start conversations. Join a sports team. Meet your friends' friends. Be a good listener. Be reliable. And other stuff you could do to make friends, rightly.

Friendships require a lot of tolerance and it boils down to how much you are willing to give and take.

But anyway, to answer your question is, probably, because we just want to have friends; instantly. And what better way of doing that other than finding a strong interest you two could relate with? Like hating someone, or something. Hate is a really deep and strong emotion in my opinion, and so is anger. So if you and your friend hate and is angered by someone or something, it's easy to make a long conversation, which will lead to many other conversations; that will lead to a lasting friendship.

That's what I think. But I'm not that sure, as of why humans do this tactic to gain friends.... :\
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M / Philippines
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Posted 9/27/12 , edited 9/27/12
nah its human nature its the sense of belongingness
if you are a hater then you will likely group with haters
if you are peace makers you will likely group with peace makers
and so on

as they say tell me who your friends are and i will tell you who you are
i guess the hate/prejudice/shunning exist to defend a groups identity/meaning

P.S. now i wonder what Naruto's solution to all the Hate of Sasuke and the whole ninja world
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Posted 9/27/12 , edited 9/27/12

ckmox wrote:

nah its human nature its the sense of belongingness
if you are a hater then you will likely group with haters
if you are peace makers you will likely group with peace makers
and so on

as they say tell me who your friends are and i will tell you who you are
i guess the hate/prejudice/shunning exist to defend a groups identity/meaning

P.S. now i wonder what Naruto's solution to all the Hate of Sasuke and the whole ninja world


People aren't so easily defined. There are such a huge number of factors that go into determining the makeup of your social circle; your propensity to be either positive or negative is only one of them. In reality, you select who you associate with by subconsciously (and sometimes consciously) assessing the relative weight of characteristics that are either pros or cons for you and adding the pros and cons up for people to see whether they come out positive or negative overall.

To give a simple example, I value a good sense of humour but I abhor prejudice so if I met somebody who was incredibly funny but was also a neo-nazi, I would have to assess whether I valued a good sense of humour more than I valued my moral and ethical stance on equality and would find that I value the latter to a far greater extent, meaning that I would be unable to associate with them. In actuality, no matter how many positives were weighed up against the single factor of somebody being a neo-nazi, the equation would still be infinitely negative, as that person would stand contrary to my firmly held moral beliefs. My point here is that I know people who are 'haters' and people who are 'peace makers', in the sense that some, including myself, tend to be critical of the things we dislike more than we are positive about the things that we like and vice versa for the 'peace makers' but that by no means that criticism and praise are mutually exclusive activities to each group, they just engage in them to different extents and both activities are necessary for social cohesion. It also doesn't mean that 'haters' and 'peace makers' must dislike each other's respective propensity to criticism or praise; personally, I'm indifferent - if everybody was constantly praising everybody, there would be no variation and it would be a very, very boring world.

Edit: I don't think that Naruto actually does or will have a solution to the perpetuation of hate in the ninja world; philosophically, the point of this whole arc seems to have been that Madara has the solution, but in applying it would take away the option to act immorally i.e. would remove free will in its entirety. Without the ability to choose to act or not to act, no action can be deemed moral or immoral; everything just is, which basically makes life completely pointless. On the other hand, Naruto's ethics are formed as a result of his adherence to his personal moral code, even when this adherence is to his detriment and it would seem that his solution is to essentially lead by example and continue to strive for a perfect world, even if achieving perfection is an impossibility.
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19 / M / California
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Posted 9/27/12
Haha, I do the same sometimes.

There is this one kid in my group who is really annoying, and I didn't like him at all.

But he kinda grew on me; like a tumor.

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M / Philippines
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Posted 9/27/12 , edited 9/27/12

xShigenarix wrote:

People aren't so easily defined


ye i know, their is rarely absolute measurement to anything
since life is about tendencies/chances due to the various factors that add/decrease probability

so im just saying here the most likely cause (maybe quantified as 40-60 percent chance of happening to be more objective)

EDIT:

and about Naruto well the opposite of Hate is Acceptance or even Forgiveness so lets see if how Kishimoto can make that out
Posted 9/27/12
I approve of this message.
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20 / M / ZA WARUDO or Stra...
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Posted 9/27/12
lol at gravity having an opposite.
Posted 9/27/12
No wonder. I'll try this hate thing and gossip thing and maybe I'll gain some girlfriends.
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