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Why do guys prefer video games over Real Life relationships
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41 / M / Utah
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Posted 10/25/12
Video games don't walk out on you.
Video games don't sleep with your friends.
Video games don't lie to you.
Video games don't lie to your friends to betray you.

And all the other $^&# girls have done to me over the course of my life. A female friend of mine, who knew all the crap things girls have done to me, gave me a sticker that reads "Girls are no substitute for a Playstation" and I proudly display it next to my computer.

If girls didn't want to be treated badly and ignored maybe they should try being nice themselves for a change.
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F / West
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Posted 10/25/12
He isnt "my guy" he is a friend, and let me amend the original thread by saying, why do "some guys" I didn't mean to imply that all guys do this. I think a lot of you are making valid points, without bashing me in your replies, as some are choosing to do.
My posting was stated in a questioning way, and that is what i sought, opinions on the matter.
I think if he continues on this path, it will be even harder for him to socialize in the outside world. We try to draw him out, , invite him to participate.. etc.
Like I said he is a sweet guy, but all he has and seems to want is his video gaming.
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23 / M / California
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Posted 10/25/12
Some guys are just like that, it may be an addiction, it may be something more idk, maybe get him to see a therapist.
52119 cr points
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21 / M / Tiphares
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Posted 10/25/12
There really isn't anything for me to add on because it would just parallel others' posts on the subject matter but have you tried approaching him from a gamer's perspective?
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29 / M
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Posted 10/25/12
Because of people like you, Naicisum, I always thought I was missing important things. Not that I played video games all the time, but I did things I did alone. Everyone said that I have to socialise etc. till I FEARED missing that "important" things. Then I jumped over my social phobias and did it ... and it was boring. The bad thing is that all I did before was spoiled for me by the statements everyone made about it. I thought it is bad and that I have to do the good things. It was spoiled and it stays spoiled, even though I don't anymore think that it's bad. Nice...

I did not say that it wouldn't be better for CalifCat's friend to socialise etc. It probably would be good for the most people like him. But don't just say that it is good for everyone, and don't bash their lifestyles. That was directed at the general public, not especially at you Naicisum.

I don't want to begin a philosophical discussion about reality and what matters, but Naicisum, your "reality" is not a iota better than, for example, the video game worlds. An occupational career? - it can be your everything but it's nothing. Relationships? - they can be your everything, but they are nothing. As long as you can see something as your everything - good for you. If you come to the conclusion that it was to no avail - that's the worst thing you can experience. Somewhere out there is someone who can talk your life into nothing, Naicisum - you would believe him and get a major depression. You are doing this to people whose everything is gaming (you even insult them openly by the way). If you say, you know right and wrong in matters like this (it's not about ethics and harming other people), you make a fool of yourself. The world is a huge place, and if someone wants to play games, let him do that - it's his life, and it's not worth less just because you make him want believe. If he uses games as an escape AND wants a change, try to HELP him, meaning that you are partners on the same level, not a teacher that knows better. Tell a child not to play adult video games, and it probably won't obey. Talk with it on the same level, and you have a chance - it has a chance.
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21 / M / Tiphares
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Posted 10/25/12

Luchsen wrote:

Because of people like you, Naicisum, I always thought I was missing important things. Not that I played video games all the time, but I did things I did alone. Everyone said that I have to socialise etc. till I FEARED missing that "important" things. Then I jumped over my social phobias and did it ... and it was boring. The bad thing is that all I did before was spoiled for me by the statements everyone made about it. I thought it is bad and that I have to do the good things. It was spoiled and it stays spoiled, even though I don't anymore think that it's bad. Nice...

I did not say that it wouldn't be better for CalifCat's friend to socialise etc. It probably would be good for the most people like him. But don't just say that it is good for everyone, and don't bash their lifestyles. That was directed at the general public, not especially at you Naicisum.

I don't want to begin a philosophical discussion about reality and what matters, but Naicisum, your "reality" is not a iota better than, for example, the video game worlds. An occupational career? - it can be your everything but it's nothing. Relationships? - they can be your everything, but they are nothing. As long as you can see something as your everything - good for you. If you come to the conclusion that it was to no avail - that's the worst thing you can experience. Somewhere out there is someone who can talk your life into nothing, Naicisum - you would believe him and get a major depression. You are doing this to people whose everything is gaming (you even insult them openly by the way). If you say, you know right and wrong in matters like this (it's not about ethics and harming other people), you make a fool of yourself. The world is a huge place, and if someone wants to play games, let him do that - it's his life, and it's not worth less just because you make him want believe. If he uses games as an escape AND wants a change, try to HELP him, meaning that you are partners on the same level, not a teacher that knows better. Tell a child not to play adult video games, and it probably won't obey. Talk with it on the same level, and you have a chance - it has a chance.


Saying all this, what specifically is your view on life? Plain and simple.
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24 / M / 3D world
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Posted 10/25/12

CalifCat wrote:

Are they socially incapable of forming something meaningful with a real girl?


Whoa girl dont say something like that just because you met one or a couple guys like that, makes me and other guys feel bad y'know?
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23 / M / Texas
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Posted 10/25/12
I used to be like that always put videogames and anime over parties and forming relationships. I was shy didn't know how to talk to girls let alone my friends sometimes because they would talk about girls so one day I got looked at myself in the mirror and said " I don't give a fuck anymore". I started to become more open with my feelings and socializing became easier and easier but in turn I ended up turning my back on anime for five years. I still rather stay home than go party because I am just not a party person. You can't change him its up to him wether he wants to change or not.
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20 / M
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Posted 10/25/12
i really wouldnt know because i would never do it but the only reason i could think of is the lack of effort
Posted 10/25/12
The internet, and gaming, make it easy to hide behind a screen. No one is looking at you, judging you, and your fears and phobias are not as strong because in a sense that screen is a mask.

However one shouldn't stay behind a screen all the time, it's not healthy. I'm not saying go out and be a social butterfly but ultimately they are missing out on life and other people.

I only say this because I speak from experience. I was in his shoes at one time. I still am in a sense.
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28 / M / Los Angeles
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Posted 10/25/12
I don't know about other guys but for me personally it isn't that I prefer games over girls, just that games are more accessible at the moment.

What I mean is that between 13 - 21 years old there wasn't more than a two week period where I wasn't dating someone. I finally took some time off from dating and just to enjoy myself but three years later now and I'm finding it challenging to get back in the game. All of my friends are guys and my class is made up of 14 other guys.

So basically it's just tough finding a starting point for a relationship when I'm not all that desperate to find one.
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27 / M / in a world where...
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Posted 10/25/12 , edited 10/25/12
i play games over dating girls because at least games i understand. no one has the right to tell me if it's right or wrong to choose games over relationships
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F / West
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Posted 10/25/12

darkness815 wrote:


CalifCat wrote:

Are they socially incapable of forming something meaningful with a real girl?


Whoa girl dont say something like that just because you met one or a couple guys like that, makes me and other guys feel bad y'know?


I didn't intend to make anyone feel bad...and I will state again, I don't mean ALL guys. I almost think if he had a choice, he would go live inside the video game world instead of the real world. I just know that the only time he shows enthusiasm or feels motivated it has to do with a video game. Does someones mentality about the real world change over time because they are so immersed in their gaming?
I mean of course I know it's a form of escapism, or a hobby or just plain fun..but it's different when its all you have and all you want out of life, isn't it?
Posted 10/25/12
Because video games don't judge me :'(
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24 / M
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Posted 10/25/12
Easy. He has already filled his closet with waifus for his harem and there is no room for you.

Joking aside, there are a multitude of reasons for this. Scared of saying the wrong thing, escapism from a cruel world, you being a girl (harsh to say, but valid), doesn't know how to start a conversation, communication is easier online, etc. etc. Any multitude of things could be the reason. Just...don't confront him directly about it in a accusatory manner or belittling attitude. We inverts tend to pick up on tone and emotion better then most males.

But it does sound like he has a problem if you have to pull him out just to eat and shower. Cutting back would be recommended.

Finally, take this tip. You are asking this on an thread in a ANIME STREAMING SERVICE website. You've got your foot in the door in regards to relatability on nerdy/otaku hobbies. That alone should make you 20% cooler in his eyes.
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