7256 cr points
Send Message:   21 / M
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I work at subway. We had enough chicken strips for a foot long and a six inch, so we had three little containers left. A customer came in asked for two foot longs of that specific chicken, I told them sorry we only have enough for one foot long. So he looks at me and ask so what are you going to do with the rest.
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"Is the Pink Panther a cat?" - My brother, after just watching a clip of the Pink Panther.
I stared up at him and blinked, then he realized what he just asked and slowly crept out of the room.
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13038 cr points
Send Message: 21 / M / West-Central Florida
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(Random scene from my sophomore year in high school)
"Mrs. Kubuske?"
"Yes, Courtney?"
"Do spiders have hands?"
*Que 21 simultaneous facepalms*
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8312 cr points
Send Message: 17 / M / Illinois
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Long time ago in middle school, we were going over a powerpoint on Japan, and the teacher was talking about how they had to plant rice on the mountains because there was so little arable land, and then this girl raised her hand and she said;
"Wait, so the mountains are made of rice?"
I literally face-desked......
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43691 cr points
Send Message: 84 / M / Region Unknown
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(math class last year)
Teach- howd you get that answer?
Friend- i divided by zero (totally serious)
Teach- Thats not possible
Friend- yea it is look i did it right here *shows paper*
*everybody facepalms/ lays head down*  |
2204 cr points
Send Message: F / Montana US
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My sister's friend will not eat at school because she says she is a vegetarian. She walks home everyday from school to eat a pepperoni hot pocket. *facepalm
My sister is a smoker, so she set up a smoking room. She says that the smoke cannot leave that room, so it will not get to her kids. *pounding my head against the wall.
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124289 cr points
Send Message: F
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14 cr points
Send Message: 26 / F
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"...he was just found dead in a facility training locker room."
"Was it fatal?"
"Yes"
"How Fatal?"
"Completely."
" I want to talk to him now."
"He's dead!"
"AGH!"
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8262 cr points
Send Message: 15 / M / Canada
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Me:*goes in the washroom*
"some guy runs to the Urinal*
Guy:Checkmate bud
^(You'll get this of you're a guy)
Me:*Goes inside a toilet*
Guy:Damnit!, that's one smartass.
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9344 cr points
Send Message: 19 / F / New York
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sounds like the words of someone who hates their life
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97 cr points
Send Message: 13 / F / World that Never Was
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(this was actually me )
me: "Hey have you seen any of my hair ties anywhere? I can't find one."
mom: "Umm, maybe you should look on your wrist"
me: -looks down at wrist-
"ohhh...." |
92 cr points
Send Message: 31 / M
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Had to re-buy 'we sold our souls for rock and roll' by Sabbath a while back. I'm listening to it in the car with my mother and she asks me in all seriousness, 'I thought you bought a black sabbath cd?'
'I did'
'but this sounds like Ozzy'
......astounded silence on my part.
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1115 cr points
Send Message: 16 / M / Your Dreams
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My dear, 13 year old cousin- "Can I get a cheeseburger with no cheese please? And don't put any salad on it either."
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beastlydude96 wrote:
My dear, 13 year old cousin- "Can I get a cheeseburger with no cheese please? And don't put any salad on it either."
That reminds me of what I said when I was at a restaurant. I said "I'd like ice tea, please, no ice." Hehe
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8699 cr points
Send Message: 17 / F / Somewhere in the...
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when i was in my world history class some guy ask out loud " who is the 16th president of the united states?" and some girl just blurted out GEORGE WASHINGTON !!!!, and the whole class just looked at her and said. Damn you a dumb ass!!!!!!!!! You dumb ass hell!!!!!!!!!!! LOL that was the stupidiest thing i ever heard it was so halarious on how they reacted to that.
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Random Topic: Dumbest Things you ever heard someone say 
