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Mars vs. Venus
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30 / F / Battle of Ikemens...
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Posted 6/17/07 , edited 6/17/07
Joke #1:

A college professor asked his students to punctuate the following sentence:
A woman without her man is nothing.

The men responded with:

A woman, without her man, is nothing.

The women responded with:

A woman: without her, man is nothing.

Thus the communication breakdown between men and women is explained!


Joke #2:

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

edit to below: ...post those Men vs. Women jokes here...that's not too hard to understand isn't it...? the point is just to have some fun and laughter while taking a dig at the opposite sex...
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Posted 6/17/07
wtf is the point of this?
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22 / M / Cliff of Hope
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Posted 6/17/07

blacque wrote:

A college professor asked his students to punctuate the following sentence:
A woman without her man is nothing.

The men responded with:

A woman, without her man, is nothing.

The women responded with:

A woman: without her, man is nothing.

Thus the communication breakdown between men and women is explained!


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.



i don't get it
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M
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Posted 6/17/07
All of us who have posted are starting a new argument, while she had the last word in the argument.
Mars vs. Venus ? How bout just "Earth", done deal.

yeh.... I love women
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27 / F / US
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Posted 6/17/07

blacque wrote:



Joke #2:

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.




That is very true actually.
Guys should just take the silence after the storm and leave it.

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27 / M
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Posted 6/17/07
Blac >.< god damn it you shouldn't open this particular gate to hell!


Magikwok wrote:
That is very true actually.
Guys should just take the silence after the storm and leave it.

But that... is just being spoiled of women to think such.
Posted 6/17/07
lol i get it you have to use the commas and stuff to get it though..without it it sounds the same
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30 / F / Battle of Ikemens...
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Posted 6/17/07
whoa...i just opened this thread so that you people can post those Mars vs. Venus jokes for everyone to have a good laugh and enjoy...but it seems to be escalating into a real battle of the sexes ne....?

why dun u all juz post the jokes and sit back and have a good laugh...?
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27 / M / idk,Illinois
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Posted 6/17/07
men are more successful then women at suicide xD
lmao
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Posted 6/17/07
^ actually i read on some news site that studies show women attempt suicide more then men, but your right, men are more successful
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Posted 6/17/07
well, i wouldn't go that far jay, more like indecisive
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28 / z
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Posted 6/17/07

mushroomjay wrote:


cbisram wrote:

^ actually i read on some news site that studies show women attempt suicide more then men, but your right, men are more successful


If you're attempting suicide, and you fail you're a fucking retard.


Or you're a woman.


LOL

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M / PLANTS
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Posted 4/5/08
this sucks
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27 / M / Columbia, Maryland
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Posted 6/17/07
Anyway, I'll just poke some jokes at the expense of women. Please don't kill me. I got these off a website.

Joke #1

A man is walking down the beach and comes across an old bottle. He picks it up, pulls out the cork and out pops a genie. The genie says "Thank you for freeing me from the bottle. In return I will grant you three wishes." The man says "Great. I always dreamed of this and I know exactly what I want. First, I want 1 Billion dollars in a Swiss bank account." Phoof! There is a flash of light and a piece of paper with account numbers appears in his hand. He continues, "Next, I want a brand new red Ferrari right here." Phoof! There is a flash of light and abright red brand-new Ferrari appears right next to him. He continues, "Finally, I want to be irresistible to women." Phoof! There is a flash of light and he turns into a box of chocolates.

Joke#2

What if God's a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I'll never know why.
(Adam Ferrara)

Joke #3

Woman inspires us to great things...and prevents us from achieving them. (Dumas)

Joke #4 (last one)

Harvard scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoeostrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women.
To test the theory, 100 men were fed 8 pints of beer each within a
1-hour period. It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects:
1.) Gained weight
2.) Talked excessively without making sense
3.) Became overly emotional
4.) Couldn't drive
5.) Failed to think rationally
6.) Argued over nothing
7.) Had to sit down while urinating
8.) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong
Posted 4/5/08
Don't get it .. Mar vs venus . Wow i thought its the battle between two aliens ..
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