Loyalty and Trust
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26 / M / Trudging on throu...
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Posted 12/5/12
What is the distinction between loyalty and trust?

Recently I came across this quote that really got me thinking:

“Trust can never be earned; It is a gift—given unconsciously.”

Do you agree?

Can you earn trust with loyalty?

Can you trust someone and not be loyal to them?

Can you be loyal to someone without trusting them?


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17 / Morioh-cho
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Posted 12/6/12
In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.
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38 / M / Charleston, SC
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Posted 12/6/12
I disagree with that quote.

I'm 36 married and have 2 children. My wife and I have been together since we were 20. In 16 years A LOT has happened. And there are many times that we both have had to choose to trust the other. And when someone that you choose to trust comes through and does what you trusted them to do you allow yourself to give them some credit.

Absolutely trust can be earned with loyalty. It's one of the pillars of trust. My wife still has sex with me after all this time because I've been loyal. I EARN her trust by being a loyal husband.

I personally could not be loyal to someone I did not trust.
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Posted 12/6/12 , edited 12/6/12

Bleidkhord wrote:

In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.


Unfortunately, this is true.

To me, loyalty is the physical decisions made, while trust must come from the heart.

If this is so, then it shows that loyalty can be bought. However, it also shows that trust cannot.

What do you think?

diodrin wrote:
I disagree with that quote.

I'm 36 married and have 2 children. My wife and I have been together since we were 20. In 16 years A LOT has happened. And there are many times that we both have had to choose to trust the other. And when someone that you choose to trust comes through and does what you trusted them to do you allow yourself to give them some credit.

Absolutely trust can be earned with loyalty. It's one of the pillars of trust. My wife still has sex with me after all this time because I've been loyal. I EARN her trust by being a loyal husband.

I personally could not be loyal to someone I did not trust.


That's a great point. If you're loyal you should be able to earn people's trust, right? But how can you be sure that they trust you? Because they said so?

The other question that I should have asked earlier is, what does trust mean to you?

Is it just an expectation? For example, could you call it trust if someone puts a gun up to your head and threatens to kill you--and you believe them. Is that called trust? Could you say that you trusted your attacker?

Just wanted to put it in different perspectives...
Posted 12/6/12 , edited 12/6/12
Trust: putting faith in another person.

Loyalty: trusting another person enough to serve them and be served by them.
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29 / M / Las Vegas
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Posted 12/7/12

Bleidkhord wrote:

In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.


You say "in these days" as if there were ever a time when most people were truly loyal. Being profit driven and self serving isnt a new concept. Its been around since the first group of people decided to coexist. In my honest opinion, most people who are loyal are usually loyal out of ignorance. Similar to how a dog would be loyal to a master who keeps him in a cage for most of his life. They simply dont know any better.

I believe that loyalty and trust are given unconsciously (ignorantly), out of sheer apathy or out of necessity.
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17 / Morioh-cho
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Posted 12/7/12

CLarose wrote:


Bleidkhord wrote:

In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.


You say "in these days" as if there were ever a time when most people were truly loyal. Being profit driven and self serving isnt a new concept. Its been around since the first group of people decided to coexist. In my honest opinion, most people who are loyal are usually loyal out of ignorance. Similar to how a dog would be loyal to a master who keeps him in a cage for most of his life. They simply dont know any better.

I believe that loyalty and trust are given unconsciously (ignorantly), out of sheer apathy or out of necessity.


I can't really remeber,but there were some people in the middle ages in europe and the japanese islands that would die for their lords in battle or to have him escape.

As they say THESE DAYS,chivalry is dead.
Posted 12/7/12
Loyalty comes with trust. If you cant trust someone loyalty will never come. But if you trust someone enough you will be loyal to them. I have 3 loyal friends, they only become loyal if you know them long enough and there is a big massive trust between you's. I am glad to say that loyalty does exist in this world when I used to think it didnt.
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38 / M / Charleston, SC
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Posted 12/7/12

qweruiop wrote:


Bleidkhord wrote:

In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.


Unfortunately, this is true.

To me, loyalty is the physical decisions made, while trust must come from the heart.

If this is so, then it shows that loyalty can be bought. However, it also shows that trust cannot.

What do you think?

diodrin wrote:
I disagree with that quote.

I'm 36 married and have 2 children. My wife and I have been together since we were 20. In 16 years A LOT has happened. And there are many times that we both have had to choose to trust the other. And when someone that you choose to trust comes through and does what you trusted them to do you allow yourself to give them some credit.

Absolutely trust can be earned with loyalty. It's one of the pillars of trust. My wife still has sex with me after all this time because I've been loyal. I EARN her trust by being a loyal husband.

I personally could not be loyal to someone I did not trust.


That's a great point. If you're loyal you should be able to earn people's trust, right? But how can you be sure that they trust you? Because they said so?

The other question that I should have asked earlier is, what does trust mean to you?

Is it just an expectation? For example, could you call it trust if someone puts a gun up to your head and threatens to kill you--and you believe them. Is that called trust? Could you say that you trusted your attacker?

Just wanted to put it in different perspectives...



I wouldn't call the gun situation Trust. I would call it belief. Do I Believe that he'll shoot me? I wouldn't trust him because if he'll commit murder then he may lie. Heck he might lie about shooting me!

To me trust means that I feel comfortable enough to tell you personal things, let you watch my kids for a while, or pass out drunk on your couch. And that may seem simple, or in jest but it's not.
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Posted 12/7/12
Trust nobody and stay loyal to every friend even with no faith thats just how I am
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29 / M / Las Vegas
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Posted 12/11/12

Bleidkhord wrote:


CLarose wrote:


Bleidkhord wrote:

In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.


You say "in these days" as if there were ever a time when most people were truly loyal. Being profit driven and self serving isnt a new concept. Its been around since the first group of people decided to coexist. In my honest opinion, most people who are loyal are usually loyal out of ignorance. Similar to how a dog would be loyal to a master who keeps him in a cage for most of his life. They simply dont know any better.

I believe that loyalty and trust are given unconsciously (ignorantly), out of sheer apathy or out of necessity.


I can't really remeber,but there were some people in the middle ages in europe and the japanese islands that would die for their lords in battle or to have him escape.

As they say THESE DAYS,chivalry is dead.


If that's how you feel about chivalry then you're wrong. It's not dead. There are still plenty of people who risk their lives for their fellow countrymen, and their leaders. Don't the military, police and firemen do that on a daily basis? I think you're just trying to convince yourself that times are different than before without really looking around... It's easy to miss things when you only see what you want to see.
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17 / Morioh-cho
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Posted 12/11/12

CLarose wrote:


Bleidkhord wrote:


CLarose wrote:


Bleidkhord wrote:

In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.


You say "in these days" as if there were ever a time when most people were truly loyal. Being profit driven and self serving isnt a new concept. Its been around since the first group of people decided to coexist. In my honest opinion, most people who are loyal are usually loyal out of ignorance. Similar to how a dog would be loyal to a master who keeps him in a cage for most of his life. They simply dont know any better.

I believe that loyalty and trust are given unconsciously (ignorantly), out of sheer apathy or out of necessity.


I can't really remeber,but there were some people in the middle ages in europe and the japanese islands that would die for their lords in battle or to have him escape.

As they say THESE DAYS,chivalry is dead.


If that's how you feel about chivalry then you're wrong. It's not dead. There are still plenty of people who risk their lives for their fellow countrymen, and their leaders. Don't the military, police and firemen do that on a daily basis? I think you're just trying to convince yourself that times are different than before without really looking around... It's easy to miss things when you only see what you want to see.


But what war are they fighting for?
I don't want to see young men and women die while old men argue.

And im not talking about our side,that's what we have bombers for.
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Posted 12/11/12

Bleidkhord wrote:

But what war are they fighting for?
I don't want to see young men and women die while old men argue.

And im not talking about our side,that's what we have bombers for.


When it comes to the military, that's how it's always been. Men and women dying for another's ideals that they may or may not even agree with. That's what "loyalty" is my friend and please believe that some of them "trust" that what they are doing is right and just.


Bleidkhord wrote:
In these days,true loyalty is hard to come by.
If your wallet is big enough,you can do anything,even buy loyalties of others. Sad i know.

I can't really remeber,but there were some people in the middle ages in europe and the japanese islands that would die for their lords in battle or to have him escape.

As they say THESE DAYS,chivalry is dead.


As far as firemen and policemen go, they are the definition of chivalry. The knightly code is something along the lines of "to protect others who cannot protect themselves." Isn't that what they do? So chivalry is very much alive.
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25 / M / The heart of Linc...
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Posted 1/7/13
I believe that is pretty much the truth.

Though sadly some people are easily bought for their loyalty.

Yet you can trust people, even if they are not loyal because a villain, you can always trust to be evil at the core.
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38 / M / Charleston, SC
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Posted 1/7/13
Can you be said to be loyal if that loyalty has a price?

Loyalty to money maybe. But truly loyal? I think not. No loyal person could be bought. It defies the definition of the word.
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