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Is it OK to like more than one person at the same time?
Posted 12/20/12 , edited 12/20/12
Depending on the situation i guess , if it manages to get serious who knows you might get unlucky : /
but the only thing i know is to make the right decision and avoid breaking someone heart .
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Posted 12/20/12
I think this question in general is difficult to answer since it is difficult to explain a specific quantity of love/like/attraction so the scope of the question is not always clear, i.e. you could mean loving your family, in which case I would say yes, or loving your partner, in which case no.


Keha7 wrote:

Johnny Depp - "if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second."


That is a genius quote.

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31 / M / So Cal
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Posted 12/20/12
Socially, it depends on where you live and your locally accepted practices.

We've been trying to phase out polygamy for a while now, but evolution takes time.

So, since it's still ingrained in the human race, embrace or deny, it's up to you.
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25 / M / Eastern Townships...
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Posted 12/20/12
Well, there's always going to be the usual flood of people saying it's wrong and impossible.


But there's a few things I'd like to bring up for your consideration. Firstly, is the value of love dependent on it's exclusivity? Basically, is the love you feel for someone reduced by the love you feel for another? Does a parent love a child less because another child comes into the picture? If the value of love isn't dependent on exclusivity, then yes, you can love two people at once. Or three. Or 15.

Secondly, we have to consider that not all loves are made the same way. The love you feel for a lover isn't the same as the love for a friend, or a brother, or a parent, or a soulmate (if you believe in the concept). So before jumping headfirst into this, some introspection is necessary.

Polyamorous relationships (as opposed to traditional polygamy which usually settles a gender-centric hierarchy) depend largely on a romantic philosophy of non-ownership. You can't own your partner, they don't owe you anything, and you need to be able to internalize this. If you can't help but get jealous when they talk of someone else, when they touch someone else, when they love someone else, then polyamorous relationships probably aren't for you. And it's not fair to start a relationship with "I can date many people but you're not allowed". Also, if you follow through with this, they need to be aware of each other, and ok with eachother being with you. This probably won't mean they'll be interested in being together, and threesomes are probably still out of the question, but yeah, it could work.

I don't think them being friends is absolutely bad thing. If they both agree to do this, then it might actually benefit their friendship, because they'll be sharing the experience with you. This one, I say with some experience.

Ultimately, there's not much that is "wrong" when it comes to how you feel. It may be incompatible with others, but that doesn't make it inherently wrong. It's all personal, in the end.

I think the Johnny Depp quote really works for situations in which you're already in a relationship, and you fall for someone else. In that context, I tend to agree - If you feel the need to move on to another, don't stay in a stagnate relationship simply because it's long standing. Even Rome fell.
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Posted 12/20/12

Keha7 wrote:

Johnny Depp - "if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second."

Enuff said.


Great quote.

I think if you love someone you want to be with that person but the human mind is annoying even when you know you love that person your still going to get attracted to other people you just have to realize with who you really want to be.
A crush last for about 2 weeks dont choose the wrong person.
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Posted 12/20/12
It's normal
Always aim for the good harem ending
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27 / M / Seattle
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Posted 12/20/12

chantillychan722 wrote:

Just being curious! I'd love to hear your opinion! Yes/No/Depends and Why for your post. おねがい! (Please! )
ほんとうにありがとう! :D


Yes, though my logic goes against conventional thought.

It's okay to like and date more than one person at the same time, so long as everyone involved consents to and is okay with it. There's nothing rational that says relationships need to be confined to two people, but relationships are build on trust and honesty, so being anything but up front about it is not okay. You also have to make sure that you give adequate attention and affection to everyone involved, because playing favorites doesn't engender much trust.

I'm not suggesting that you should do so (because you should do what works for you, which this may not), but should you wish to attempt this sort of relationship, I would suggest not moving forward if anyone in the arrangement shows any apprehension about things. That's often a sign that things are unlikely to end well.
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16 / F / shioshishio ♥
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Posted 12/20/12
Sure it is.
I just find it awkward to like more than four people. ._. . To me if you like more than four people that's not even...
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25 / M / California
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Posted 12/20/12

Keha7 wrote:

Johnny Depp - "if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second."

Enuff said.



pretty much says it all. gj
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22 / Male
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Posted 12/20/12
well why not?
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21 / M
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Posted 12/21/12 , edited 12/21/12
Yes,Why not?I like more than one person. That's cuz I like my friends and I don't have just one.I don't hang around anyone I don't like.

In the intimate since. Well there will always be the one person that I love overall( hence I'm not in a relationship with them). But it doesn't mean I would feign liking someone else because I like the said person more.I like people for their mentality.If I like it. Then I like them as a person in the same.I don't really draw attraction to anyone from my sexual preference just cuz I like them.


It makes me laugh when a girl draws a whole nother level of meaning to it when I say "I like you."
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23 / F / Sexual Chocolate
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Posted 12/21/12
It can work, although it takes a weird mix of personalities to pull it off.

I used to work with a guy who was in a relationship with a girl and another guy and all three lived in the same house. Evidently the 2nd guy was bi and the first guy (my coworker) had this weird "if it's with you it's okay" thing going with the 2nd dude and both had feelings for the girl who had feelings for both of them. I went on a double date (I guess that's what you'd call it) with one of my exes and the three of them once and the three really did seem to be together. That was one of the rare occasions when me and my date weren't the ones getting odd looks in a restaurant.
Posted 12/21/12

Keha7 wrote:

Johnny Depp - "if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second."

Enuff said.


Source of disappointment. There's no universal rule, don't fool yourself.
Posted 12/21/12
Eh.
I guess its ok.
You're the only one who really is gonna know.
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25 / F / Seattle
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Posted 12/21/12
"You can't help who you like."

:P
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