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Why do people engage in self-destructive behavior?
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23 / M / Hughesville, Penn...
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Posted 1/2/13
Why is society so focused on the abuse of alcohol, drugs, and casual sex? I do not understand why people willingly engage in these and similar activities. Do they provide enough utility in order to make a shorter and more painful life worth living? I would hope so, because there is no reason why this culture should take precedence over one based on love.
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34 / M / The Void.
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Posted 1/2/13
Because they are confused.
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28 / M / Bay Area CA
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Posted 1/2/13
Crutches for some or just how people choose to live their life. I did a lot of drugs not so long ago, it's not exactly the optimal thing to do with your life but it has its moments.

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25 / M / Sydney, Australia
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Posted 1/2/13
I can't answer for the other two (alcohol and drugs) because I've never done them and don't have the urge to.

But I engage in casual sex because of curiosity and a natural urge to do it. It's not because I want to self-harm.
Yes, I do feel dirty and cheap afterwards... but some days I get that urge to want to touch another person... like to hug them or kiss them only. But if I say that, nobody will want to meet with me... so I have to say I want sex as well.

And if you're wondering why I never look for a relationship, the answer is simple, relationship is hard to find while sex is easy to find, just one text message, and the next minute I'm in a cheap motel with someone.

I'll probably end up like Bridget Jones, 30 and singing "All by Myself".
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20 / F / ireland
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Posted 1/3/13
Casual sex is is safe if you take all the precautions you should (things can go wrong) and like the above said, it's a natural urge.

Alcohol is a big part of socialising, where I'm from anyway. It loosens people up and distracts them from the drudgery and boredom of adult life.

Drugs I don't know about, maybe people like the buzz but I see way more negatives than positives as far as drugs are concerned. Probably the same as alcohol
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23 / M / Hughesville, Penn...
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Posted 1/3/13
Just because you are hard-wired to have sex doesn't mean you should devote your time to pursuing opportunities with random people or view pornographic content. There is no need for this destructive behavior that leads to rape and unwanted pregnancies. If we as a society care at all for women, then we need to discourage this crude behavior and emphasize that sex is not a right, but a privilege.
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23 / M / Guess
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Posted 1/3/13

lordseth23 wrote:

Why is society so focused on the abuse of alcohol, drugs, and casual sex?


1. Because it's fun.

2. Because it's fun.

3. Because it's fun, and it feels good.



I do not understand why people willingly engage in these and similar activities.


Because we aren't stiffs.


Do they provide enough utility in order to make a shorter and more painful life worth living?


Better than utility- it provides pleasure.


I would hope so, because there is no reason why this culture should take precedence over one based on love.


What do you mean 'based on love'? Hedonism=/= want of love,
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23 / M / Hughesville, Penn...
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Posted 1/3/13

longfenglim wrote:



I would hope so, because there is no reason why this culture should take precedence over one based on love.


What do you mean 'based on love'? Hedonism=/= want of love,


A culture based on exercising the highest levels of empathy, which does not include this uncivilized behavior.
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23 / M / Guess
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Posted 1/3/13 , edited 1/3/13

lordseth23 wrote:


longfenglim wrote:



I would hope so, because there is no reason why this culture should take precedence over one based on love.


What do you mean 'based on love'? Hedonism=/= want of love,


A culture based on exercising the highest levels of empathy, which does not include this uncivilized behavior.


Yes, a culture based upon a highest levels of empathy- we empathise with each other's need for sex, which is why, as two consenting adults, we decide to engage in it.

But since it is uncivilised and uncultured behaviour, how about this:

We engage in consensual pre/extra-martial sex while playing the entire Ring Cycle in the background, after getting drunk off our arses on Champagne, Cognac, whatever, and, after some Marijuana and LSD, discussing James Joyce's Finnegan's Wake.


I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm- bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthurnuk!
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Posted 1/3/13
Well, anything out there can kill you in this day and age, but people seem to be solely focused on the above mentioned (drugs, alcohol, and casual sex).

The modern generation seems to be stuck on this "YOLO" thing as seems popular in a few songs. But to each their own.

I drink and have been drinking for a long time. When I was younger, I abused the stuff. Nowadays I moderate and enjoy it a lot more responsibly. Should a day come where my doctor says no-no, then I'll reluctantly put it down and call it quits but until then I will continue to indulge myself.
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23 / M / Hughesville, Penn...
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Posted 1/3/13 , edited 1/3/13

longfenglim wrote:


lordseth23 wrote:


longfenglim wrote:



I would hope so, because there is no reason why this culture should take precedence over one based on love.


What do you mean 'based on love'? Hedonism=/= want of love,


A culture based on exercising the highest levels of empathy, which does not include this uncivilized behavior.


Yes, a culture based upon a highest levels of empathy- we empathise with each other's need for sex, which is why, as two consenting adults, we decide to engage in it.

But since it is uncivilised and uncultured behaviour, how about this:

We engage in consensual pre/extra-martial sex while playing the entire Ring Cycle in the background, after getting drunk off our arses on Champagne, Cognac, whatever, and, after some Marijuana and LSD, discussing James Joyce's Finnegan's Wake.


I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm- bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthurnuk!


That isn't empathy, it is inhuman.
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23 / M / Guess
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Posted 1/3/13 , edited 1/3/13

lordseth23 wrote:


That isn't empathy, it is inhuman.


No, it is more human than some artificial anti-natural code of chastity, indeed, it can be said to be a Biological Imperative that we mate, and mate as much as possible. And it is more empathetic that I understand their pain of not being able to have sex and join them in it, then to not understand their pain, and then campaign to outlaw extra-martial sex.
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23 / M / Hughesville, Penn...
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Posted 1/4/13

longfenglim wrote:


lordseth23 wrote:


That isn't empathy, it is inhuman.


No, it is more human than some artificial anti-natural code of chastity, indeed, it can be said to be a Biological Imperative that we mate, and mate as much as possible. And it is more empathetic that I understand their pain of not being able to have sex and join them in it, then to not understand their pain, and then campaign to outlaw extra-martial sex.


It isn't a problem if every boy was mature enough to understand the consequences of sex. Until this happens, it is wrong to support a culture that promotes rape and teaches boys to look at a poor, defenseless girl in Ohio as a sex toy. Seriously, how can you not see fault in this?

http://www.cnn.com/2013/01/04/justice/ohio-rape-online-video/index.html?hpt=ju_c1
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23 / M / Guess
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Posted 1/4/13 , edited 1/4/13

lordseth23 wrote:


longfenglim wrote:


lordseth23 wrote:


That isn't empathy, it is inhuman.


No, it is more human than some artificial anti-natural code of chastity, indeed, it can be said to be a Biological Imperative that we mate, and mate as much as possible. And it is more empathetic that I understand their pain of not being able to have sex and join them in it, then to not understand their pain, and then campaign to outlaw extra-martial sex.


It isn't a problem if every boy was mature enough to understand the consequences of sex.


Of course, boys like you, good Children, know that we shouldn't be using these evil Devilish things known as Contraceptives.




Until this happens, it is wrong to support a culture that promotes rape and teaches boys to look at a poor, defenseless girl in Ohio as a sex toy. Seriously, how can you not see fault in this?

http://www.cnn.com/2013/01/04/justice/ohio-rape-online-video/index.html?hpt=ju_c1


And casual sex is not rape in that one does not involve consent while the other does. No one is disagreeing with you that rape is bad- rape is horrible- casual sex, however, is not rape.

Let's mark it in red:

Casual Sex is not Rape


Thus, if we lived in a culture that says 'rape is alright', then you may have something, but no one is saying rape is alright. In fact, not only is no one saying rape is not alright, people are actually saying that it is wrong.

Casual Sex is not rape, it is alright because it is consensual- you know, the thing that rape isn't.


But you know, your problem is that you need a few pints of beer, a little bit of Marijuana, and a night of hot, consensual Casual Sex.
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31 / M
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Posted 1/5/13
All the world's ills are not solved by sex, drugs, and rock & roll. And I think that's the OP's entire point. Rather than focus on one's own personal predilection for abusing illegal substances and engaging in random acts of carnal pleasure, one might instead turn an eye toward the actual issue.

People use both alcohol and drugs as a method of escapism. It's a self-destructive escapism because it breeds dependence and eventually leads one down the road to death. And yes abusing any drug, even marijuana, can eventually kill you. Whether it's the drug itself or your own impaired judgments that do you in is beside the point. I can list a great many people, a lot of whom were public figures, who killed themselves because they just couldn't get enough drugs or couldn't put down that damn bottle.

Casual sex is just as dangerous, even when you take all the precautions in the world because you can't hide from the psychological damage it does to you. While it might be fun to get your willy wet every now and again, living a life of casual rendezvous starts to degrade your sense of self worth. Whether you realize it or will admit to it, it begins to slowly rip away your ability to project and accept true intimacy. You begin to grow cynical of people for whom you engage in these one night stands with. You start to agonize over who else they might have slept with and whether or not you've just become a fuck toy to someone else.

All of these problems, I believe, stem from the lack of standards and character that has been allowed to perpetuate because of people who pretend to be 'free-thinkers' but in fact think of nothing but themselves and what the world can do for them. Personal responsibility is nigh extinct, and that's where the problems of excess start, when people think themselves immune to consequences.
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