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Spoiler Alert! Click to show or hide It's really difficult for me to explain.
Basically, when my family asks me for a gift, I tell them straight out what I want.....but I'm really not expecting them to get it for me.
What they end up doing, however, is getting me a gift, that is usually way more expensive than the item I requested.
For example, last Christmas, (and the Christmas after that,) I asked for a bookcase. They got me an xbox360 last year instead. This year, they got me an ipod.
I understand that these are really amazing gifts, and all, and I really do appreciate my parents getting it....but I just....its not what I wanted. Or needed. And really.....WHAT adult parent gives a bad ass gadget to an adult child?
I feel like, I can live without an ipod, and an xbox. I can just wait until somebody gives me a job, then I'll probably save up for those.....but, the bookcase?I honestly, REALLY need it. My room has been in disarray for almost 2 years now, due to all these books that I've tried to keep in their small space, but no matter what I do, they always end up where they shouldn't be. I've got stuff underneath my bed, and in a few months, I won't be able to hide any more stuff underneath there. My closet is a tornado...I cleaned it a month ago, but it still ends up a mess.
And I guess the reason why I have a lot of resentment towards this issue is the fact my parents are strict, yet they're always trying to spoil me. They always insist on buying me things, even when I tell them not to, or to take over my tasks when I want to handle it myself....and then they always want me to stay home. IT makes me wonder if they're trying to guilt-trip me. Basically saying, if I made a mistake, they'll give me this long lecture of how they're always sacrificing everything for me and this is how I repay them. It's like, they intentionally do these things so that I feel guilty later. I try to tell them I can handle things on my own, but we always end up arguing and next thing you know, my chore is their chore.
I'm not gonna deny...this sounds like a very spoiled post. But I have been spoiled for a long time, and technically, I'm getting very tired of it. Every time I get something nice, I know I'm sacrificing more of my freedom. I basically feel like a well-cared for pet in a cage....sure, I get fed and stuff, but I can't really go out.
I guess what I'm trying to ask......how do you people feel about getting expensive gifts that you don't need?
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play it cool look happy then go to your room later in day and have stupid sarky comment about it but most times am pretty cold and tell people up fount shop buying me expensive stuff i will never use so now i just get given cash all the time or get asked of items i need and such
there's no point wasting mounys if your not going to use it
kinda the best thing to say is
sorry but i will never use it and its wast of cash if am not going to use it
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5108 cr points
Send Message:   25 / M
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About the same way i feel about gift cards instead of cash.
Why are you buying me something that makes me shop in 1 place instead of anywhere and can expire?
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5663 cr points
Send Message: 16 / F
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I get extremely upset when people buy me expensive gifts as opposed to just money or something cheap that I need. I'd much rather get things which I need over things I desire, and I hate seeing people waste money like that.
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AsakoNatsume wrote:
play it cool look happy then go to your room later in day and have stupid sarky comment about it but most times am pretty cold and tell people up fount shop buying me expensive stuff i will never use so now i just get given cash all the time or get asked of items i need and such
there's no point wasting mounys if your not going to use it
kinda the best thing to say is
sorry but i will never use it and its wast of cash if am not going to use it
Sad thing is....I do end up using it. xD Both for my enjoyment, and so that my parents don't get upset that i don't use them..... however, I'm pretty sure that if I hadn't have gotten them, I would have been okay with it.
But yeah, I agree, I'd rather just get cash or items I specifically need. During my birthday last year, my parents got me a camera that I never asked for. What do i need it for? My phone is the only camera I need, and it even has its own effects and filters. -__-
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MaskedFrog wrote:
About the same way i feel about gift cards instead of cash.
Why are you buying me something that makes me shop in 1 place instead of anywhere and can expire?
There are some cards that I do enjoy, like Starbucks. xD But this is probably due to the fact I never really shop in those places, so the fact this person gave me this gift card for one specific please made me remember it existed, lol.
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TheDreamHare wrote:
AsakoNatsume wrote:
play it cool look happy then go to your room later in day and have stupid sarky comment about it but most times am pretty cold and tell people up fount shop buying me expensive stuff i will never use so now i just get given cash all the time or get asked of items i need and such
there's no point wasting mounys if your not going to use it
kinda the best thing to say is
sorry but i will never use it and its wast of cash if am not going to use it
Sad thing is....I do end up using it. xD Both for my enjoyment, and so that my parents don't get upset that i don't use them..... however, I'm pretty sure that if I hadn't have gotten them, I would have been okay with it.
But yeah, I agree, I'd rather just get cash or items I specifically need. During my birthday last year, my parents got me a camera that I never asked for. What do i need it for? My phone is the only camera I need, and it even has its own effects and filters. -__-
so true there ^^ a phone to days is good camera i must say ^^ and is wast cash i guess just hard to by gifts to day because most people have what they need like years a go you be so happy you got a new hammer
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MountainMew wrote:
I get extremely upset when people buy me expensive gifts as opposed to just money or something cheap that I need. I'd much rather get things which I need over things I desire, and I hate seeing people waste money like that.
That's how I feel as well. I usually don't even tell people what I want, because I'm afraid they're going to think I'm some selfish brat, or they're going to ACTUALLY get it for me, lol. I'd rather get the luxury items on my own, so it could save other people the trouble. Other than that, when people pester me what I want for my birthday, I usually just tell people to get me stuff that I usually need, or to just surprise me. I even told my parents that one of the cheapest places you can find a bookcase is Wal-mart.
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9044 cr points
Send Message: 26 / M / Gotham City
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I can understand the frustration, but I guess it'll be hard for you to understand where your parents are coming from until you have your own children. Their life is probably dominated with fear - fear that you aren't getting the best opportunities in life, that you're not getting the luxuries in life other parents are able to give to their children, and the fear that if they don't exert enough control over you going out and such that something bad can happen to you.
Sure, your parents are extreme on one side of the spectrum - giving their child TOO much, and being TOO involved in their child's life. On the other end of the spectrum, they could be depriving their child, and having no presence in their child's life.
All I can say is that you should talk with them.
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2734 cr points
Send Message: 19 / M / Connecticut, USA
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If someone holds me in such high regard that they are willing to spend high amounts of money on me, I can't feel bad. Don't confuse this with being spoiled however.
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22566 cr points
Send Message: 18 / F
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i feel bad about them wasting too much on me that i end up using it just to let them see that im not wasting it  |
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Banned
31426 cr points
Send Message: 32 / M / The Universal Con...
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I would be thankful for it since I can sell it for money and buy something that I want.
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5520 cr points
Send Message: 20 / F / Germany
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To me it means they love me |
2934 cr points
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I always see gifts as an obligation... so I feel pressured to give something of equal value back. Not my parents though.
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9981 cr points
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Spoiler Alert! Click to show or hide TheDreamHare wrote:
Spoiler Alert! Click to show or hide It's really difficult for me to explain.
Basically, when my family asks me for a gift, I tell them straight out what I want.....but I'm really not expecting them to get it for me.
What they end up doing, however, is getting me a gift, that is usually way more expensive than the item I requested.
For example, last Christmas, (and the Christmas after that,) I asked for a bookcase. They got me an xbox360 last year instead. This year, they got me an ipod.
I understand that these are really amazing gifts, and all, and I really do appreciate my parents getting it....but I just....its not what I wanted. Or needed. And really.....WHAT adult parent gives a bad ass gadget to an adult child?
I feel like, I can live without an ipod, and an xbox. I can just wait until somebody gives me a job, then I'll probably save up for those.....but, the bookcase?I honestly, REALLY need it. My room has been in disarray for almost 2 years now, due to all these books that I've tried to keep in their small space, but no matter what I do, they always end up where they shouldn't be. I've got stuff underneath my bed, and in a few months, I won't be able to hide any more stuff underneath there. My closet is a tornado...I cleaned it a month ago, but it still ends up a mess.
And I guess the reason why I have a lot of resentment towards this issue is the fact my parents are strict, yet they're always trying to spoil me. They always insist on buying me things, even when I tell them not to, or to take over my tasks when I want to handle it myself....and then they always want me to stay home. IT makes me wonder if they're trying to guilt-trip me. Basically saying, if I made a mistake, they'll give me this long lecture of how they're always sacrificing everything for me and this is how I repay them. It's like, they intentionally do these things so that I feel guilty later. I try to tell them I can handle things on my own, but we always end up arguing and next thing you know, my chore is their chore.
I'm not gonna deny...this sounds like a very spoiled post. But I have been spoiled for a long time, and technically, I'm getting very tired of it. Every time I get something nice, I know I'm sacrificing more of my freedom. I basically feel like a well-cared for pet in a cage....sure, I get fed and stuff, but I can't really go out.
I guess what I'm trying to ask......how do you people feel about getting expensive gifts that you don't need?
consider it lucky... you must work hard or be very lucky.....cause that kind of stuff don't happen to everyone
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