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Is a woman’s life pointless without children?
Posted 2/10/13
no it wouldnt be pointless their are still houses that need cleaning and dinner that needs cooking
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Posted 2/10/13

FlyinDumpling wrote:

So another argument (yes, again) I've encountered. I told someone I didn't think I'll have children in the future nor do I want to. So in response this person said, "How do you know you won't want to have children in the future?" I don't know, but as of right now these are my feelings. Also, I just don't think I'll be a good parent. While talking, the girls around me acted like what I was saying was unreasonable. As if they couldn't believe their ears.

"Why wouldn't you want kids? what would you do when you get old?"
OMG JUST WHAT WOULD I DO??? Play with my iCane or something -____-"""
"but that's soo......"
Empty?
"yeah"

Apparently my life is meaningless if I don't bear children. My life is not centered around having kids, that's not what I envision for my future, and I don't believe that's my sole purpose in life. I know it's not as close minded as I'm making it out to be, but it's either you want to, or you don't. ...and I don't. So what I got was "yeah, but still......" It seems to me that people think: you can get an education, get a job, and achieve all your dreams, find your soul mate ...but you better have kids in the end, because that's just how it is


Yes absolutely it's pointless, that's why you should get back into the kitchen and make me a sandwich, shoes and socks are optional.

Seriously though.

If you really want to save humanity, or really believe you are an 'environmentalist' and ESPECIALLY if you life in 'the first world'. Having kids, bringing more people into the western oil sucking carbon producing lifestyle is.. well it makes all your blue bins, and careful sorting of garbage or driving a Mini... a pointless exercise in alleviating guilt.

however... as to meaning in life? Isn't that for you to decide?


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Posted 2/10/13

sizzlingmochi wrote:


1mirg wrote:


is a womans-life pointless without children?


I never read anything so, sexist.

OMG she didn't replace 'woman' with 'person'! Everyone else got the message. Little late on board don't you think?


Actually i've heard people tell men that their lives are pointless unless they father children. so actually... putting person in. might change the nature of the question. however i don't think it's sexist to ask a question specifically about woman if that's what the OP wants to know.


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Posted 2/10/13 , edited 2/10/13

Oldthrashbar wrote:




Well, of course the person you choose to have children with is a person you are willing to share happiness with! So you get the best of both worlds. And children are like little happiness generating machines. I'm not saying you need children to be happy. All I'm saying is... why not? There is nothing to lose!


Most people that choose not to have children do so specifically because there is something to lose. I can't back this up, but there is a perception that raising children takes time -- time that could be used doing something else. And while it's definitely not impossible to become say, a world-renowned physicist and raise children, it seems as though you could spend more of your time on physics, and thus be a better physicist. Hell, maybe we'd have quantum mechanics all figured out by now if physicists didn't have children. That's a bit of an extreme example, but you could see how having children might get in the way of one's life goals, and some goals can do a whole lot for humanity and for yourself. On the extreme side, I feel like helping all of humanity might be more enjoyable than having kids, and on the more moderate side, I can see that reading, or spending time with friends, or whatever might be better than kids. I've seen people lose friends because of kids, and it's not like they hate each other or anything -- they just stop seeing each other. You (and maybe I) might think that having children beats that, but are you ready to say that friendship is undeniably less enjoyable than having kids? Granted, most of the time people just keep their best friends around -- you usually don't end up losing everyone you like chilling with, but if someone wants to keep all of them, I don't see anything wrong with that notion. At any rate, I get your drift, and I'm mostly in agreement, but one thing that I wholeheartedly disagree with is that having kids is better than not having kids. I sincerely believe that there are better things out there for some people, and that it's not unbelievable or in any way insane to think that you might be happier without kids. I've definitely thought it before.
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Posted 2/10/13

Why the rage splurge? aren't you suppose to be an understanding adult?

But because I have children
-After you just said you were inexperience, it's one or the other. I'll even let you decide.

If you can't man up enough to handle raising a child then... you're a shit person.
-reword: "if you don't raise a child, you're a shit person"
I hate to see that day when you beat your child with a bat because they said they don't want children

Simple. It's not actually that hard!
-How old are your kids? It's like you're saying
"well, taking care of a child means taking care of them when they are babies....forget about when they become teens with even more complicated issues and them not wanting to hear advice from their too-old-to-understand-father"

Oh no!! How much of MY time are they going to take? How much of MY life do I need to sacrifice for them?
-You seem to be assuming that I don't want kids because of the time it will take out of my life.

Everyone thinks they are so entitled.
-I am not entitled, so therefore I should have kids? pfft

Many people find themselves old and alone because they chose not to give a little bit of themselves to a child.
-You need to give everything of yourself to a child (most of it anyways). If you half ass it, as claimed here, it will reflect in the way they act. If there is a department that's lacking....it will affect the child and sometimes certain circumstances prevents this from being accomplished. This is the point where you ask them for their understanding...and whether they will accept it will determine everything else. Also as they get older, problems get more complicated and unforeseeable. A small mistake can cause huge consequences. I am a prime example....since i still considered myself a child to my parents rather than a full grown adult. You too, weren't you a child once or did you not have any hardships as one?
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Posted 2/10/13
There are happy people without children, be it a man or woman.
Although I'm not a parent, I'm sure that having a child or adopting one is an indescribably happy feeling.

However, your life isn't pointless unless you want it to be. It's the same thing for any human to be pointless UNLESS they do something, so this "pointless" title won't be crowned on your head if you do something that gives you worth.

For example, my little 3rd grade self that played Runescape everyday was pointless.
mipegg 
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Posted 2/10/13

PhyongHwa wrote:



Geez. This is one of the many reasons why I homeschool my kids, so they can be kids and not be pressured to be mini adults. At that age all you should be thinking about are all the toys you want, not having kids.


You think? 12 is an age where lots of kids are going through puberty, with the crazy hormones and emotional changes its not unreasonable to expect them to be curious about their own bodies, sex, children etc. Atleast, I seem to remember thinking about that kind of stuff when I was 12-ish
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Posted 2/10/13
Lol, what the ef is wrong with people.
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Posted 2/10/13 , edited 2/10/13
Of course it isn't, not that many people seem to agree to that. I've told people I have no interest in bearing children or raising them, but most people just say I will eventually, because "everyone wants to bear children". It's as if people don't even believe there's a life outside of children, I couldn't imagine how they treat those who can't bear children.
Honestly, I can't believe anyone thinks having a child is easy. I don't have children, but I watch children because parents just don't have the time to between working all the time just to support their child. Watching children is absolutely stressful, and far from easy.
I, personally, have no interest in children; I don't believe it makes my life meaningless, if anything it gives it more of a meaning when I have more time to work towards my own dreams.
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Posted 2/10/13


I wouldnt worry too much about people arguing having children is a necessary for a fulfilling life, or that everyone wants to have children. Birth rates in developed countries are no longer growing at the same rate as they were before, some of them are actually negative. Many young couples are no longer interested in having children, whether it is the right thing to do or not is irrelevant, it is their decision to make. Having children will not always make life more fulfilling, and having children to improve your life, to me is the wrong reason to have children. Having children because you are expected to do so, or because its just how it is, to me is not necessarily a good thing. you are taking care of a living thing, it is not a decisions that should be taken lightly because it is what you are expected to do. From the moment you choose to have a child, your entire life will change for the rest of your life.

You should have children because you are willing to dedicate your life to them, not because you believe it will improve your life.
As for someone's purpose in life being solely having children, i think that is rather asinine. Life does not have an inherent purpose, people make their own purpose in life and give their own lives meaning.

I have no interest what so ever in having children, my parents and grandparents are very aware that they will most likely not have grandchildren or great grandchildren coming from me, and quite frankly it has never been an issue with them.



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Posted 2/10/13
Don't worry about it. If you dont have a natural desire to have chilren, then please dont. In fact take all necessary precautions (eg.. birth control) to ensure you dont. Please save space on this small planet of ours for children who will be loved and appreciated.
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Posted 2/10/13
That group of people doesn't represent everyone's opinion and far from any sort of baseline opinion either...
I have plenty of friends who doesn't want kids and they don't get questioned for that.

I could even go as far as saying that it's what our goverment want us to desire.
An education, productive citizen that shuts up, pops out offspring so that the cycle can repeat it self, but I guess it all depends on how you look at things.
Posted 2/10/13 , edited 2/10/13

wtfbbq68 wrote:


thefinalword wrote:


wtfbbq68 wrote:


thefinalword wrote:

there are certain stupid people ( usually the ones roaming around wal-mart )
that don't need to be having kids.


Assumptions. And how would you know? If you're the retarded looking loser in your picture, you seem to lack the capabilities to have kids (let alone get laid). And since I assumed you can't have kids, that makes you worse off than those wal-mart bozos who do have kids. Thus you are a burden on mankind for being unable to carry on the species.


Uh oh, I touched a nerve with you.
you must shop at wal-mart.



Never shopped a day at wal-mart, nor will I ever step foot in that slave factory. But here you go with assumptions again. I'd probably touch a nerve of yours but, your sensory organs are too small, similar to the rest of your external organs, you wouldn't feel it. Am I right?
Tl;dr? You're overcompensating for something you lack, by looking down and generalizing on a group of people whom you observe shopping at the same place you shop too.

This game of assumptions is boring.


then keep your mouth shut.
You'll be less inclined to think you're tougher than you actually are
e-thug. What's funny is you yourself make derogatory statements about Walmart
yet you play the captain save a hoe position if it's someone else. You sit there with your
own hypocritical statements when you yourself have assumed things
from the beginning. You don't know me so you're assumptions of me are wrong.
You're an ant compared to the things I've already accomplished in my life.

Let me ask you, did you work on something that had a Oscar awarded to it?
Well I did, you're a child compared to me.

I just took it easy on you kiddo.

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Posted 2/10/13
I get pressure from family and friends from time to time about having kids, and media has pressure built in along with an idealized vision of being a parent. But that doesn't mean a woman's life has no meaning if she has no kids. I'm a firm believer in "just because you can doesn't mean that you should".

I had decided a long time ago that I would probably not have kids, and now that I'm older I am back and forth on the subject. I actually think I would be capable of raising a child pretty well at this point. But in the end I decide that I most likely will not for a few reasons. The biggest of which is that I'm still selfish in some ways.

For example, my friends at work were all talking about if they were pregnant and they knew their baby would be disabled, they would still have the child and do what they had to do. They would be OK with it. If I knew I was going to have a disabled child I can't say that I would be OK with it. I know from experience that having a child with special needs puts a lot of stress on the whole family, including the child in question, and I can't say I'd want to put everyone through that. So with this, I consider myself too selfish to even try.

Some people give the reason that having a child will insure someone will care for you when you are old. There is no guarantee that your child will be there for you when you are old. They'll have their own lives when they are adults. Who is to say they will be in a position to help you when they are older? Who can guarantee your child will outlive you? No one can, and it's not enough reason to convince me.

There are more reasons but this post is already too long I think some people have children simply to give their lives instant meaning, however that is not the only way that you can give your life meaning! Like many have already said before, life is what you make it. Don't succumb to societal pressure to do what they want you to, do what you feel is right for you.
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Posted 2/11/13

mipegg wrote:


PhyongHwa wrote:



Geez. This is one of the many reasons why I homeschool my kids, so they can be kids and not be pressured to be mini adults. At that age all you should be thinking about are all the toys you want, not having kids.


You think? 12 is an age where lots of kids are going through puberty, with the crazy hormones and emotional changes its not unreasonable to expect them to be curious about their own bodies, sex, children etc. Atleast, I seem to remember thinking about that kind of stuff when I was 12-ish


At 12 I was thinking about making money (babysitting) to buy candy, junk food & music.... and I still played with toys.....but that was back in 1983.
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