This is my first time starting a thread but here goes anyway...

What's the stupidest lie you've told and thought there is NO WAY this person will believe this crap!

Mine was when I was a teenager. I told my friend that Green Day's tour bus broke down in front of my Dad's house and they came to my door to ask to use the phone. I went on to tell her that they stayed and played a couple songs for me then gave me backstage passes to their next show. I didn't think she actually believe me since I was saying it in a totally sarcastic manner. It wasn't until she started telling other people my lie that I thought, oh my god how stupid is this girl? Who on earth would believe that lie? I told everyone else that I was just kidding when I told her that obvious lie... I never told her though!

Like I said, this wasn't really meant to be a lie, it was in response to her telling me and obvious lie about her meeting Coldplay and them taking her out to dinner.

So...
What was your lie and why did you tell it?

Was it like mine, meant to be a joke?
or
Was it meant to cover something up?
or
Was it just for the hell of it?

i don'r remember when but I once told a buddy of mine that the tentacles in some hentai shows were real. He acted like he didn't believe me but i noticed that he put up a question on wiki answers so he really did question whether they were real. What is really funny is that the trolls came to my aid and told him they were real. LOL

I was very young and still quite happy to be a thief stealing small things from various locations. I was in a...um...religious building and decided that I would practice pulling money out of a donation box. Something I never did before by the way. So I wasn't really expecting any success but then to my surprise I managed to snag a wonderful $50 bill. Of course then I had a problem. I wasn't working at the time for anyone other than my family who obviously paid me and I was quite well known for spending money the second I got it. I had no real way of spending the money since my parents would have to take me to the place and walk with me inside the place to spend it so I had to either come up with a lie or put the money back. Due to me posting in this thread I am sure it is obvious which path I chose. I decided to tell my mom that I found the bill folded up in the coin return of the pop machine as it was the only somewhat logical place that my stupid brain could come up with at that age. She believed it but my happiness was crushed when I was told I could only spend it on clothes but oh well. I believe that was one of the last times I ever stole something that wasn't digital.

Telling people my brother was adopted....
and people actually believing me.

I'm such a mean person, I know.

i can't lie. the guilt in the end kills me. so i choose not to. i dont even remember the last time i lied.

I have upon numerous occasions actually told people that I knew what I was doing. . .

I told my friend over the phone that i got my whole body covered in tattoos. (knowing i dont even want one) he believed me and asked where he could get it done for cheap. that was just something i said because he is really gullible.

I told a boy I couldn't have sex with him 'cause my Dad made me wear a chastity belt every time I left home. So he said if I only had to wear it when I left home that he could sneak into my house when my parents were sleeping.. I have a hard time just saying no..

I do this quite often myself ^_^

i lie often, often jokingly. but the one that gets people believing is when i do racial jokes of myself.

Back when I was in college me and a buddy of mine convinced a group of freshmen that you were actually supposed to pull condoms all the way up and over your balls. A year later we were at a party and overheard a group of people discussing this and telling other people to try it. Good times.

God exists?

Sir, I have to ask.. what reason did you give them as to why you were hanging from a telephone wire with your pants on fire?

Wait.......whut?

About 35 years ago when I lived out in the Pacific Northwest I would take weekend trips with a good friend up to British Columbia to photograph freight trains out in the high country. We usually camped out overnight in rugged areas only tolerating the public for warm meals (eateries) and restroom facilities (rest areas). It was the visit to the latter at a highway rest area that we encountered a tourist who was obviously lost and disoriented. He asked us if we knew which direction Vancouver, BC was. I must add that this part of Fraser River Canyon back then was traversed by just one major highway and the only two directions you could go by car were east and west. My friend could have easily pointed the correct direction to the man but it was obvious from his breath and demeanor this gentleman was still recovering from an inebriated state of intoxication.

My good friend Dan, not one to ignore the plight of this traveller in need, decided to test his cognitive skills or recall. He looked at the guy straight faced and asked "Which way did you come from?". The old guy thought for a moment, staggered to the rest area entryway, and pointed east. My friend didn't miss a beat. "Did you see Vancouver in your travels coming from that direction?" The old guy gave both of us a cursory glance, scratched his chin with his right hand for a moment, glanced skyward, and replied a rather sheepish "No?" "Well," Dan intoned, "it must be that way", inferring the opposite direction while pointing with an arm gesture toward the west. I wish we had taken a picture of that look of bedraggled perplexion the old bugger gave us. At first I thought he was going to hit us for being dipsticks. But no, his cranial wheels slowly moved toward enlightment, his facial muscles beamed and revealed a smile, and he thanked us for being so helpful while staggering back to his car.

This could have been a fun lie. My friend could have pointed east. This slightly inebriated Indian could have remained confused and wound up back in Kamloops again but that, thanks to my friend's wry sense of wit, didn't occur.