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Should the wife or husband name the child?
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29 / F / Australia
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Posted 3/29/13
I would flip a coin.
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24 / M / In My Most Cheris...
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Posted 3/29/13
Both it took two to make the child and it takes two too raise the child, equality is one key to a healthy relationship and family
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31 / M / So Cal
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Posted 3/29/13

HikariHaru wrote:


BearSol wrote:

Depends on your religion.

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
1 Timothy 2:12

The Koran has a similar one, as you'd guess.

In short, if you're Muslim or Christian, the man names the child.
If you're, basically, anything else, you discuss it civilized-like.


Not necessarily...my friend is Muslim and her mom named her.. that might apply to a christian but not for sure to a muslim.


If you follow the Koran, you're Muslim. If you don't, you've got your own thing going on, albeit based on it, which I think is a far greater thing.
All people should follow their selves.
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Posted 3/29/13

OmnileoneS wrote:

I would flip a coin.

So your child would either be named heads or tails?
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26 / M
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Posted 3/29/13
Both decide... If all else fails, just make sure she has twins and then each gets to name one.
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20 / F / Parallel Mooniverse
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Posted 3/29/13
Both parents should come together and decide on a name. That should be their fist decision together as parents in my opinion
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28 / F / California
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Posted 3/29/13
I think both the wife AND husband should come to an agreement to name their child. Yes, the wife carries the child for 9 months, it obviously took the husbands "help" to make the kid. Thats just my opinion though.
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21 / M
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Posted 3/29/13
In my opinion, both.

I wanna name my kid something funny...Like Seymour and last name Wiener.
He'd probably get torn in school, but whateves.
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27 / M
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Posted 3/29/13

PhyongHwa wrote:


PhyongHwa wrote:

.



mojojooo wrote:
That's deep. Very deep. You almost convinced me there.

But in my ancestral tradition, the child is named after an ancestor. Or we give them a name that we want them to become, or something out of experience concerning them. We also believe that a name determines the child's... sort of... destiny. Like their personality & attitudes. For example my african name means Child of the Rainstorm. I was named after my aunt who was born under a tent (meant for childbirth) in the forest during a heavy rainstorm. In our ancestral traditions we honored The Earth, so all aspects of nature have different meanings for us.


With my parents, my father named all 3 of us. The names weren't bad, except my mom wasn't happy that she had no input (my dad was chauvinistic /overbearing), not even being able to choose a middle name for us (we have none). My eldest sister has the same name as my mom ("triad"), and the rest of us just have a random name (old fashioned type name). ("To bind", & "foreigner") They ended up divorcing after 25 years of marriage and numerous (my father's) affairs.

With my kids, my husband & I attempted to name our first son, but we couldn't agree. I really wasn't a stickler for the name I wanted, and I kind of liked the name my husband picked, so we went with that....We couldn't agree on a middle name. We even left naming him for the last minute, but we couldn't agree ....so he didn't get a middle name. We figured he could give himself one if he wanted to in the future, although it will cost him ($$$). His name means "victory of the people".

With the 2nd kid, I had a combo of being unhappy that I couldn't give our 1st the name I wanted especially after experiencing all I had to go through for the pregnancy and natural childbirth (no time for drugs). (This kid almost died twice, once before birth and once after birth.) I named the 2nd kid the name I intended for the 1st one, and just like the 1st child we didn't give him a 2nd name (same reason as the 1st time). His name means "small", which is ironic, 'cause he turned out to be super tall and towers over us all.

The 3rd kid (best pregnancy & childbirth ever) I named the male version of my beloved grandmother's name who had died about 2 years earlier. I figured we weren't going to have any daughters (I was right), and that this would be our last kid (wrong) . His name means "strong".

With our last son I went through some unbelievably hellish stuff (life & death, physical & mental pain beyond imagination) to bring him into this world alive. His twin had died really early during the pregnancy too. That is the reason he is the only one to have a middle name (in honor of his lost sibling). His 1st name means "warrior"/"fighter" his second name means "twin".

My husband didn't really care much about naming them unless the names were too unusual (which they weren't). After him witnessing all I had to go through (pregnancy/watching the births), he agreed that I should be the one to name them all after the 1st kid.


I disagree entirely. As a father myself and have been a "spectator" as you say, the act of child birth shouldn't give the woman ALL the say in names, especially since it is something the child will have to live with forever and the father will have an effect on that child's psyche. If done right he will have spent just as much time in raising the child as much as the mother. People will judge not just the child, but the parents for anything that child does. So the father should have a say in the name of the child that will represent him and the childs mother in the future. Also the father doesn't give the child his last name. It is a last name shared by husband and wife and can be which ever you want it be after marriage. A child is also not a gift. He/She should be the culmination of the love that the mother and father share with each other.

As for my application in this, I am a single father with custody of my kids. I'm not saying that I wouldn't love my children if they were named some of the names my ex came up with, but I would have attempted to get a name change as soon as the divorce was through so my kids didn't get picked on for having dumb names.

I also don't mean to play down the dangers involved with child birth. A good friend of mine almost lost his wife and daughter due to complications during child birth. All I really want to say in the last 2 paragraphs is that actually birthing a child shouldn't give you automatic rights to everything important regarding said child. The father (hopefully) will be just as active in raising the child as the mother and should have equal rights in all decisions. If I offended in anyway, I apologize as it wasn't the intention of my post. Just my thoughts on the matter.
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Posted 3/29/13 , edited 3/29/13

PhyongHwa wrote:


PhyongHwa wrote:

.







mechlior wrote:
I disagree entirely. As a father myself and have been a "spectator" as you say, the act of child birth shouldn't give the woman ALL the say in names, especially since it is something the child will have to live with forever and the father will have an effect on that child's psyche. If done right he will have spent just as much time in raising the child as much as the mother. People will judge not just the child, but the parents for anything that child does. So the father should have a say in the name of the child that will represent him and the childs mother in the future. Also the father doesn't give the child his last name. It is a last name shared by husband and wife and can be which ever you want it be after marriage. A child is also not a gift. He/She should be the culmination of the love that the mother and father share with each other.

As for my application in this, I am a single father with custody of my kids. I'm not saying that I wouldn't love my children if they were named some of the names my ex came up with, but I would have attempted to get a name change as soon as the divorce was through so my kids didn't get picked on for having dumb names.

I also don't mean to play down the dangers involved with child birth. A good friend of mine almost lost his wife and daughter due to complications during child birth. All I really want to say in the last 2 paragraphs is that actually birthing a child shouldn't give you automatic rights to everything important regarding said child. The father (hopefully) will be just as active in raising the child as the mother and should have equal rights in all decisions. If I offended in anyway, I apologize as it wasn't the intention of my post. Just my thoughts on the matter.




Nah, no offence taken. I recognize that you come from a different generation (I'm 42), culture (race/religion), history, situation (married 22 years), and different gender than I. I'd be surprised if we agreed. What matters is what the two spouses agree on. If you look closely at the last few things I wrote, you'll see that my husband agreed with me, so it all worked out for us that way.
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F / Earth
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Posted 3/29/13

HikariHaru wrote:


BearSol wrote:

Depends on your religion.

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
1 Timothy 2:12

The Koran has a similar one, as you'd guess.

In short, if you're Muslim or Christian, the man names the child.
If you're, basically, anything else, you discuss it civilized-like.


Not necessarily...my friend is Muslim and her mom named her.. that might apply to a christian but not for sure to a muslim.


No, not true for Christians either, at least for the most part. There are so many different forms of Christianity, just like there are different types of Muslims/Islamic religions.
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27 / M
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Posted 3/30/13

Arkthethird wrote:

Seems hot when you put it that way


I ignored the possibility of lame humour.
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20 / M / Canada
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Posted 3/30/13
One picks a female name and one picks a male name then it's all up to chance
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21 / M
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Posted 3/30/13
Plan A: Work together to find a name you both agree on.
Plan B: Rock-Paper-Scissors.
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21 / F / I'm Lost
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Posted 3/30/13
Both should have a say, obviously, since both parents are rising the child. If one parent HATES the other's name choice, it's not really fair to pick it, heh.
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